Diaper Discipline, Child Abuse and Secrets

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Diaper Discipline, Child Abuse and Secrets

by Darlene Barriere – Webmaster
(Kamloops, British Columbia, Canada)

The following article was written in response to a comment made on my Ask Darlene page Is diaper discipline child abuse? The comment by MJ dated July 15, 2008 titled How would a child know DD (diaper discipline) is child abuse? suggests that being made to keep the discipline a "secret" is a measuring stick for whether or not the discipline being imposed is actually child abuse. For my visitors who are not familiar with the term "diaper discipline," it refers to the practice of placing an older child—in many cases, an adolescent child—in diapers for disciplinary purposes.

I agree that being made to keep "secrets" is a red flag for child abuse. However, when it comes to discipline that involves any type of humiliation—diaper discipline and spanking, for example—most older children would be secretive of their own volition. A parent wouldn't have to insist that a child keep such a secret; the child would do so willingly in order to avoid scorn and laughter from their peers and possibly family members as well. Older children in particular feel deep shame when such disciplinary methods are incorporated, and as such, would be unlikely to disclose even what would be considered by society as appropriate discipline. The fear of being ridiculed is too great. What 11-year-old would openly state that s/he had been spanked as punishment the night before, never mind tell anyone that s/he had been forced to wear a diaper, and risk the teasing and mockery that would accompany such an admission?

Furthermore, although the authorities and child protection agencies might view the use of diaper discipline on a fully continent child, especially an older child, as inappropriate, they would not necessarily recognize it as child abuse. There is an important distinction to note here. Much as it should be, it is not illegal to put a continent child in diapers for the purpose of discipline. There would have to be an extreme case for diaper discipline to be considered child maltreatment in the eyes of the law. And it's unlikely that victims of such maltreatment would be willing to disclose and face not just private, but also public humiliation.

Child abuse of all types is still significantly underreported. And worse than that, some of the most insidious forms of recognized child abuse are still ignored by those in charge of protecting children: emotional abuse in particular, of which diaper discipline should be considered. The system tends to turn a blind eye toward the effects of emotional abuse because these effects are not so obvious, and because overworked and understaffed agencies must prioritize their caseloads. Typically, case workers are more prone to act on child abuse situations where the child is considered to be in "immediate danger." And even when a child is in clear and present danger, action is not always taken, as we all too often hear about on our local evening news. Children continue to die at the hands of their parents, even when agencies have been made aware of the abusive home situation beforehand.

To summarize, when a child is compelled to keep the method of discipline being imposed upon him/her a secret, that is a red flag; and as such, should be taken into account when determining whether or not child abuse is present. But that in itself is not enough to conclusively state that child abuse is indeed present. With regard to diaper discipline, it is doubtful that a fully continent child would willingly disclose such an embarrassing form of so-called discipline. Parents wouldn't have to swear the child to secrecy; the mere thought of repercussions from friends and family members of such a disclosure is enough for any child to voluntarily keep quiet. It is for this reason the issue is far more complex than whether or not keeping secrets is an accurate measure for whether or not the discipline being imposed is child abuse.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

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Diaper Discipline, Child Abuse and Secrets

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Jul 23, 2008

Secrets
by: Anonymous

As a kid, I didn't EVER have to be told to keep any "secrets." My parents would have encouraged me to tell, because they knew others would only tell me that I deserved everything I got, and of course I believed that myself. I was too embarrassed and humiliated at the type of "discipline" incorporated, usually belt-whippings to the point of severe injury, sometimes near unconsciousness. It was bad enough when the evidence of those injuries sparked a teacher to ask me questions. Rather than lie, I said nothing. I just put my head down in shame. I blamed myself for the serious bruising, the cuts, the abrasions, the inability to sit or lean back at my desk without tears, the neck and back injuries, injuries that even 45 years later continue to remind me of the physical abuse I had to endure at the hands of my not so loving parents.

Dec 12, 2008

diaper discipline
by: Anonymous

Without arguing semantics, I experienced diaper discipline on numerous occasions. I should qualify that by saying I was also a bedwetter. Of 6 kids there were 3 wetters with diapers used as the management tool. As one might expect, parental frustration led to extended diaper time. While this tactic proved to be a waste of time in regards to eliminating the wetting, it was continued as a control mechinism. Since the sight of a diapered older child in our house was not uncommon, the shame effect was present but minimal. However, the long term effects are inarguably potent. The memories of defacating in a wet diaper cause anxiety. I don't believe the lasting effects inhibit or prevent me from functioning normally. But the memory remains a bit disturbing.

Feb 06, 2009

Put in diapers
by: Anonymous

I was a bed wetter past the age of 13 and wore a dispsoable diaper to bed every night. I have the memories but they were all good ones. My parents used diapers as a problem solving device vs. discipline. However, if I had an accident, like during the day, I was put in diapers which was more often when I was 6 to 7ish. If you treat it as discipline then its a bad thing, if you use diapers for problem solving and explain to the child why they are wearing diapers again then to me its not a bad thing. I was actually glad to wear a diaper at night because to me its much better waking up in a wet diaper than wet bedding and pajams.

Mar 18, 2009

A (Slightly Long) Teenager's Veiw On This Whole Situation.
by: Amayafalls

NOTE: I AM NOT A VICTEM OF DIAPER DISCIPLINE
...I'm fourteen and the idea of diaper discipline deeply disturbs me...
I have allot of pride in myself;humiliation is one of the scariest things to me.
Every time I hear of this topic I don't see how the severe emotional trauma I would suffer as a result of such treatment,if that were the case,could not count as child abuse.
If my parents tried anything of the sort my first instinct would be to run blindly away.
The word suicide also springs to mind.In all seriousness.
Please believe me when I say I am not the kind of person to consider such things,in fact I yell at my best friend who is a frequent self-harmer quite often.So I put up a red light on any topic that would even make me CONSIDER such a ghastly solution.
As for the parents who think they are RIGHT to put their child through this,how dare they think they have a right to do that to any person!Physical abuse will heal;it is every scaring moment that will stay with a person for the rest of their life.
Such as this whole topic,having to urinate among other things within the confines of a diaper and then ask for a new one?And be changed by someone else?That is disgusting.Some parents make their children go to school like that!
For anyone who cares,this woman and in fact all the women on this site who think they are worthy of dominating anyone are quite sickening...How can this not count as child abuse?
It comes down to the parents inability to control a child as they should be controlled,and instead resort to humiliating them to make the parent feel better,if you dig deep enough you find it's the parents own insecurity and doubt of their own authority that brings this about.A friend once said to me in an unrelated topic:
'If you give an adult a little bit of power, they go mad with it...'
Without sounding arrogant,in many cases it's a true enough statement.Some adults find it hard to stop themselves if they are given the power to do this kind of thing to a child,they are too sadistic to admit its wrong and delight in the misfortune of the victim.They go as far as indulging in it and enjoy watching the child suffer to a point where it stops being punishment for what the child had done,and becomes entertainment for a sick parent.I don't know anyone who counts as a child or teen who would even consider destroying a person in such a way,we fight,spread gossip,say mean things and certainly embarrass each other...But deep down we would never do anything to the extent or level of humiliation and we would feel sorry for what we did do if something bad came from it.None of the parents I've read about involved in this are even the slightest bit remorseful.
Truly Frightening.
PS:That was not a knock at adults in general;just the offenders and the sadistic who is could apply to.
PPS:This whole comment may not even be meant to be posted here,but it seemed like a good idea at the time...

Apr 20, 2009

D.J.
by: Anonymous

I have posted my experiences with this discipline. Reading about the possibilities of suicide or the thoughts there of, by a teenager expressing their concerns about diaper discipline.This really strikes home, I did attempt suicide as a teenager and was institutionalized for months after.All of my therapies were approved with the consult of my mother the loon who drove me to this attempt on my life.With the approval of my Doctor I was put in diapers in hospital with the recommendations of my mother.The abuse that drove me into hospital was basically endorsed and reinforced by the hospital.A lot of the clinical therapists that read in on my case did petition to child services on my behalf but there was nothing illegal or detrimental about diapering your child no matter what age they are.Now the laws have changed since the early 1960s but are people really getting involved and making the calls when children are in peril.I survived but look at the suicide rates in Canada for teenage kids, they are alarmingly high and growing.This may not be just caused by diaper discipline but what other horors are these children enduring? As an intelligent society we really need to stop and look and make the concerted effort to protect our childern.Love your fellow man includes their children as well.

Apr 21, 2009

To DJ:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Oh, D.J., not only did your mother deprive you of dignity and respect, she regressed you without any consideration for either the short- or long-term consequences to your psyche. And she did it with the complicity of a medical doctor and the hospital where he had privileges. It is shameful that such practices could ever be considered legal. Even today, diapering a child would not necessarily be considered illegal per se. And even if such practices were reported to Child Protective Services, by the time something were done about it, the damage would have already been done. Yes, we have laws against child abuse, and diapering an older child for discipline would be—and should be—classified as emotional child abuse...but the fact is, emotional child abuse of any kind is the most difficult to prove and thus do something about.

D.J. I agree with your comments wholeheartedly. As a society we all too often forget that children are people too. That children deserve to be treated with dignity and respect, even when they need discipline. Society's mindset has to change; because if it doesn't, as long as we continue to accept that violence and degradation are acceptable in the name of "correction", our children will continue to be in harms way.

Thank you for your thoughtful post, D.J.

Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Apr 21, 2009

diaper discipline
by: D.J.

Darlene thank-you for answering my little rant over the two pages of this topic. When I entered into counselling I thought I was the only child ever to be forced into diapers under the guise of discipline. Over the many years and the many different types of therapy, including electric shock therapy, I have learned that this was common.I have found some good information here and of coarse we have the entries of the fetish thrill seekers. None the less thank-you for the reading materials in all of the posts.My friend still would like me to try one of her diapers on to see that they won't hurt me, but as I said a little more therapy first.Thank-You again.

From Darlene: You're welcome, D.J. But at the risk of starting a communication that I cannot keep up (I have more than a dozen submissions in queue, awaiting my attention) I want to be very clear about something...I am VERY careful not to allow this, or any other thread on this site, to become a haven for fetishists. Obviously I cannot stop visitors from reading material on this site. Nor can I control how that material will be used. But it is important to note that I have deleted dozens of inappropriate posts on the issue of diaper discipline alone.

It must also be noted that fetishism IS an effect of this type of child abuse. And while I recognize that your friend was not disciplined with diapers and was not abused, but rather diapers were used as a "tool", one cannot ignore the fact that having gone through the diapering she went through, she WAS left with a diapering fetish. Parents need to be aware that diapering of older, toilet-trained children can and does leave children with a diapering fetish that carries with them through adulthood. When parents are aware of such things, perhaps they'll think twice about what they impose on their children, even when their motives are pure and not humiliation-based.

Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Apr 26, 2009

Don't underestimate stupidity... but it's the key
by: Adult Baby

Hi, Darlene.

Let me tell you upfront I'm a so-called "infantilist". I hope you don't hate the entire AB/DL community because of a couple of scumbags.

It's all fun and games for them, and they all know who they are as infantilism is easy to detect to a trained eye. But one needs to know about that fetish to expect it. The majority of [normal] people don't. It's not mainstream like foot worship, latex, BDSM, etc. Strangers walking into those sites would not know they're talking to "fake" parents, but to any person with an average IQ it's pretty obvious those are freaks. You may know nothing about infantilism, so you won't be able to tell what kind of freak, but you'll definitely feel you're talking to a freak.

I'd have stopped right here and called those DD sites nasty, but harmless, but... Never underestimate human stupidity. Simpler, less educated parents with lower IQ are vilnerable to this "prank", just like they may easily become victims of other pranks and frauds.

One would say, that people cannot possibly be THAT stupid. Drive on the freeway observing someone doing something unbelievably stupid, and the chances are the next day you'd be stunned by something 10 times dumber. There's no bottom.

I'm gald they at least have some deterrents in place like the additional sign up effort, so most people would just pass. But stupid people can also be determined. Also what about sickos and their hidden sadistic side awaken by the DD idea? Sadly many of them have children. We cannot deny stupid and sick people their right to procreate and multiply. So while the chance of that stupid or sick parent finding his way onto the DD site, signing up, accepting the idea, and implementing it is slim, the statistics will eventually win and it will definitely happen. This is why those sites should be closed.

The only weapon that can be used against them is not surprisingly, the stupidity. They play pranks on unsuspecting parents, so you can also play a prank on them. It'd be messy, but that's the only way to get them. They're not breaking any laws, so you can't go after them until something really happens. Stupidity works wonders in American courts. Fake your stupidity, "punish" some kid and have him(her) take you to court. Then you'll have the right to point fingers to your "advisors" and after the discovery who they are (ABDL, and not real parents) it's pretty much a walk in the park. maybe I'm being naive. I don't have any legal experience. And I understand no parent would subject their kids to that, but that's the only way to get them. Or wait until it happens for real and persuade the child to press charges.

Good luck shutting up those bastards.

May 28, 2009

My story about daipers and abuse
by: Anonymous

When I was around 7 years old my mom had a boy friend and visited us and eventaully lived with us for 9 years. He was extremely awful to me, he would put me in diapers until I was 12 and have pleasure punching or beating me to the ground. I also remember that he sexually abused me . He finally left before my 16th birthday but the damage had already been done. I was afraid to tell anyone until I was 19 (I'm now 22) and nobody believed me. My therapist tells me that I may have multiple personalities but I don't beleive him. The diapers that I had to where were pretty shaming because I thought I was old enough to wear underwear. My teachers would ask me about the bruises and cuts I had and said that I skateboard and I'd fall off. He would enjoy inflicting pain on me and it just made it worse, because now I have made suicide attempts. My mother wasn't helpful because she knew but he couldn't have him leave because he'd helped to pay the bills. She would sometimes yell and throw objects at me if I talked about it. But diapers can be a sign of something like abuse if they are over 10 years old, but it's not an absolute sign. I really don't remember my life before age 15.

Jun 06, 2009

Is this an example of abuse?
by: Anonymous

***Removed by Darlene Barriere - Webmaster in order to eliminate duplicate content***

Post can now be seen at Is diaper discipline child abuse? In order to read the post, you'll have to scroll down to the date June 9, 2009.

From Darlene: Anonymous, I am no longer able to answer questions from the thousands of visitors I received each day. However, I will point you toward a page on my site where I answered this question some time ago: Is diaper discipline child abuse? There you'll find my reply and more than one hundred responses in the comments section.

Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Jun 29, 2009

Scars from youth.
by: Anonymous

My discipline was at the hands of my mother. I had misbehaving, I was about six or seven at the time and just liked being the center of attention. Mother was an R.N. at the local hospital and did alot of community work in our area. Mother had warned me a number of times to act my age and stop my misbehaving or I would regret my actions. Well the warnings fell on deaf ears so my mother would always say. It was Saturday morning and mother had her babysitting training classes at the Community Center. She taught all the younger teenage girls the basics of babysitting. On the way out the door with all of her teaching stuff and supplies mom said your coming with me. Off to the community we went why I do not know. Upon arrival mother said come with me to the dressing room behind the stage. In the confines of the dressing room mother informed me that I was to be the model for the training session today.You want to act like a baby we are going to treat you like a baby today. All I can remember was I started to cry and did for most of the class that day. Mother being a Nurse had all the larger than normal diapers and baby pants required to dress me as a baby.I was drug out in front of about 20 teenage girls and used as a baby diaper model for their babysitting training classes. I was diapered and rediapered so many times I lost count. A lot of theses girls were older sisters of all of a lot of my friends from school. From that Saturday on I hung my head in shame, I also acquired a new nick name from the girls that spread through the school. Mother thought the change in my behavior warranted the drastic measures she had taken. From that point on this became my usual punishment for any infractions of the rules. Mom would diaper me and haul me outside to show everyone I was acting like a baby again. She always threatened me with diapers and babypants at school if I didn't behave. This never came to pass but there were a few diapers only at the park for misbehaving.Mother would diaper me and force me into my sisters stroller and walk me down to the park.

Dec 12, 2009

Mother enjoyed humiliating me
by: Anonymous

My mother and my father too would drag me from outside into the house when I was 5 years old because while playing I sometimes wet myself a little bit. My brother or sister would tell my parents and before I knew it I was dragged into the house and my pants and underwear were pulled off me and I was pushed onto the hallway floor where a towel was put down and my parents would diaper me in front of my younger sister as if to demonstrate to her how to diaper a baby. I was made to sit in my room with only a T- shirt and diaper on. I was told that if I wanted to play with my friends I would have to wear the diaper and I was forbidden to take it off the whole day.This happened several times before I entered grade school. As an adult years later my younger sister would tell her friends that I was her baby brother.

I believe this treatment caused fetish issues in me many years later. I still remember having baby oil rubbed on me by my father and putting baby powder all over my bottom while my siblings watched. Once I was in day care as a child and I stood by watching as a 2 year old was being diapered on the carpet. The daycare woman turned to me and threatened to put me in diapers too if I continued to watch. I turned and ran in horror. Now as an adult I think I would like to have let her do to that to me. I have a warped sense now that I would enjoy the whole ritual of being diapered.

Dec 17, 2009

You might think this doesn't happen
by: Anonymous

But it does. It has happened to a lot of us. Hopefully, it is slowing now because medicines have been developed to help with bedwetting and stuff, but you know there are tons of whackos out there.

Jan 16, 2010

Diapered for bedwetting
by: Anonymous

My stepsister started to wet her bed at age 5 after her parents divorce. She would wet the sheets pajamas etc. every night. Sometime around 8-9 she was reintroduced to a form of diaper called Staydry Panties. She continued to wear these nightly till she was 13. It did not seem to have had any bad effects and surely made her more comfortable with a much less smelly room.

From Darlene: Anonymous, I thank you for your comments, but I must point out that this thread is about diaper discipline, not using a padded pullup pant as a result of bedwetting. Although if done as a means to humiliate and undermine the development of the child, this too is emotionally abusive, but it doesn't appear to be the case in what you described. Diaper discipline is when a parent chooses to discipline their older child by putting them in diapers in order to treat them like a baby, and hence, regress them (very emotionally abusive). In this thread, posts should reflect the diapering for discipline phenomena and/or the effects of such. I do thank you for your understanding, Anonymous.

Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

Jan 22, 2010

Inspired by You
by: Amber

Darlene, I want to thank you for your help on educating me on this horrific topic, I am planning on reading ur book and I am not done researching this subject. This has honestly inspired me even more to follow through with my dream career. When I finish college and higschool I want to be a pcsychologist who specializes in abused women. I am 15 and when I get older I want to help fight this for the helpless children who are stuck being punished/humiliated this way, I do what I can to help now but there's not much I can do yet, jus listening to victims of abuse and talking to them. Or helping friends/family with problems.
Thank you, again,
Amber

From Darlene: I am so glad that you've learned so much about this topic through my site, Amber. I am so proud of you for deciding that you want to make a difference in the lives of others by going into a field that will indeed provide all kinds of help for victims of abuse. I have no doubt that you will achieve great things in whatever field you chose to go into. Always remember, when you do something to help another, whether it's in a line of work, as a volunteer, or just "because", you will reap the rewards in ways that cannot be measured. Today, you were that reward for me, Amber. Thank you for writing and sharing how I have inspired you, because today YOU inspired ME.

Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

May 07, 2010

Imposed Diaper Wearing - Child Abuse?
by: Anonymous

I suppose the most determining factor would be the intent/motivation for the parent's behavior and the manner in which the "diaper" was applied?

When I was a child I had a life threatening Brain and spinal cord infection which left me with partial loss of muscle control on my left side and which also affected my bowel and bladder control. I had been "toilet trained" for five years when the illness took place.

On medical orders my mother, a nurse, followed my daily bowel and bladder activity. If there were indications that not all was well, I would get an enema and/or my fluid intake would be increased.

This continued for several years until my nervous system, somehow, recovered some control.

I was often diapered and made to wear plastic or rubber "protective panties" to insure that I would not be embarrassed by and "accident". I did not appreciate my Mother care taking in this manner and sometimes would make a fuss about having to be diapered like a baby. I knew two other children in our neighborhood that had similar problems but for different reasons. My Mother had arranged for me to meet another boy (one year older than I) who wet the bed. Apparently, his sister did also. I spent the night at his home and there his Mother and he told me about his problem. I was relieved to learn that I was not the only child in our town to have such a problem.

My Mother was always patient and calm when tending to my toileting needs. Yes, it was embarrassing to have my Mother give me enemas and diaper me, but she often assured me that she knew how embarrassing it must be for me and said she understood how I must feel. I believed her.

One summer an Aunt visited for a whole month. When she learned of my periodic diapering needs, she insisted that she could and would help. I was not at all comfortable having my Aunt diaper me. I had no reason to trust her. Her first attempt at diapering was a disaster for all concerned. In frustration she ending her efforts with several threats of "further punishment" and stated that I should be "ashamed of myself" for having to wear diapers and for putting my Mother through such a hardship. My Mother found me in tears when she arrived home an hour later. She asked and I told her what had occurred. There was angry word between the adults in the house and my Aunt left two days later.

Anger, threats and shaming are the abusive element of the story above. I felt bad about my Mother having to care for me in that manner. I would have never been able to live with the guilt if there had also been shaming and threats added to the experience.

The other thing my Mother did which obviated any potential abuse from the situation was that she carefully explained what she was doing and why and made sure that I understood and agreed that it was necessary or better that it be done.

May 07, 2010

To Anonymous re your comment titled "Imposed Diaper Wearing - Child Abuse?"
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

This thread is about diaper "discipline", not imposed diaper wearing. There is a HUGE difference between what you described and what is being referred to here. Diapering for discipline is exactly that, diapering a child that is toilet trained (and older children, including teenagers) to shame, humiliate and control behaviour and has nothing whatsoever to do with toileting. It is age regression which can have a severely detrimental effect on the emotional needs of the child/teen; THAT'S what makes it child abuse. THAT'S what makes it totally inappropriate.

Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

Jun 01, 2010

I went through diaper discipline
by: Steve Danish

When I was 6 or 7 or so my mother put me back in diapers and forced me to go to bed wearing them. She told me that If I was going to act like a baby I was going to be treated like one. Starting with being put back in diapers. She said as soon as I learned to act my age she would let me out of diapers. I was terrified that people would find out that I was put back in diapers. Needless to say because of the shame and utter humiliation I changed my attitude real quick. So I would be allowed out of diapers. It does work wonders but the trauma of being put in diapers has lasted up to this day. Its similar an nature to, (not to sound like a terrible person and diminish this in any way) but similar to a girl being raped. That is what diaper discipline is like to a child. Because that is what you are doing to a child by putting them in diapers.

Jul 03, 2010

My story
by: Lei Mi

I was abused with diapers and other baby items for almost a year by my foster parents, a 'punishment' for my regressions. My father had died in a car accident and my mother, unable to mentally cope with the loss, had been committed to a mental health facility. I was ten at the time I went into a foster home.

Like may children who suffer severe loss and trauma, I began wetting the bed at first, and displayed other immature behaviors, such as thumb sucking and crying easily. My foster parents were at first patient with me, but when I began day wetting as well, they lost that patience.

At first, I was only diapered for bed, but several weeks later, my foster mother began diapering me during the day as well. She also implemented baby items, such as pacifiers, baby bottles, baby toys and the like. She told me when I acted my age, she'd treat me my age. She pulled me out of school and home schooled me, which I suppose was a good thing. I didn't have to go to school in diapers and 'baby clothes'. Ann, my foster mother, was a pretty good seamstress and had made me all manner of baby style clothes to wear, like short dresses, pants with snaps and shirts with baby show characters (like Elmo or Barney). My foster father even helped in the 'punishment' by building a humongous crib and converting an old barber chair into a high chair for me.

My abuse lasted for just shy of one year, and ended when my Mom was released from the hospital and regained custody of me. She was appalled at the way I'd been treated, and reported my fosters to the authorities. They were not arrested for it, but I did learn they were not allowed to foster children anymore.

Because of the way my foster parents treated me, I have never been the same. I am now twenty, and in college. Outwardly, I am a happy well-adjusted woman. Inwardly, however, I am still that 'baby' they created. I often wear diapers whenever I feel alone or stressed. The duality of my life often drives me mad. I feel ashamed and afraid someone will discover my baby side, and go to fearful lengths to hide it. To do this, I often avoid parties or dating, and do not live in a dorm. The only person I know knows is my mother, and it's bad enough knowing she knows.

For anyone who thinks diaper discipline is a good thing, consider what it will do to that child in the long term.

Lei Mi

Aug 13, 2010

Good parents do make mistakes
by: ADHDExample

This site addresses Child Abuse, and there's much appropriate anger in people's comments; but I'd like to propose the idea that what some label as Abuse might sometimes just be an accident, and that what damage occurs is sometimes self - inflicted angst due to our lack of cultural tolerance.

I'm nearly 55 years old now, and still have to fight nearly every day the old compulsion of a diaper fetish. It was probably caused by a misstep, not malice, and I feel not so much guilt as much as I fear telling anyone that might know me.

I've lately uncovered the likely trigger for this impulse, and as frustrating as it has been, I bear no associated ill will toward my parents; I imagine that no parents could possibly realize all the implications of little 'slips' they might make.

My folks had always been loving, and devoted to their five kids. They were also a bit young, in their early twenties, and may have 'slipped' just once during one of those random, crucial developmental moments in the child's brain. I was a very sensitive boy of about 4 - 5, long out of diapers, and can still remember being 'double diapered' by two angry parents on our old ironing board for having 'dirtied' my pants. One can hardly expect overworked parents to have kept a perfect record of patience, especially with a child with an as-yet undiagnosed ADHD.

Some doctors believe that shame or anger, triggering adrenaline, can invoke the storage of latent 'seed' memories which become part of a person's sexual development. This stuff can apparently be buried deeply; Having temporarily forgotten the triggering incident, I found in my early teens that I desired diapers, as a 'feels good' kind of thing, years before my first sexual experience, at the age of 17 - Some time after which, intense longing came to be associated with the visual trigger of seeing diapers, or even thinking about them.

Who can have forseen that such a long, latent, invisible process could eventually emerge from an event - One that my folks have probably already long since forgotten and certainly would not then have understood? I never associated the trigger with sex, nor understood this thing myself until after I was married with three kids in my late forties.

Life is messy. People's development is chaotic. Although a tragic accident can certainly happen when an overworked commuter falls asleep at the wheel, the poor driver may have been negligent, but can't be accused of deliberately trying to kill anyone.

I can hardly justify any resentment, just because some random chance, and our cultural norms, have left me frustrated by craving a pleasure that I can't practice.

Aug 17, 2010

My parent "tried to help."
by: Anonymous

I am older than dirt now. I collect Social Security and I am male. This site is a blessing. I relate to several categories. 20 years ago the internet didn't exist - at least not for me. Thank you for this site. I was in therapy and am now surviving just fine.

As for diaper discipline, I would wet my pants in the first grade. Our house was two blocks away. So I went home and changed. One time I went home and mother didn't have any of my "regular" clothes cleaned - at least that was the story. No under wear and/or jeans. So I was diapered and wore a small shorts (plastic pants showed). My mother tried to "help" me adjust things so nothing showed. I was told, " Well it was just for the afternoon." I cried, then was taken back to school. I ran home and almost was hit by a car. No secret had to be kept. For many years I fell for the act of having no clean clothes and my mother trying to help me cover things up. I learned to know better.

Thank you for this site. It is a blessing.

Oct 03, 2010

diaper discilpine
by: Anonymous

I am a mother of 3 children and a step son. My hands are tied when it comes to my setp son so I turn to you for advise and help. I believe my step son's Mother is doing diaper discipline with my step son. He come's to us 2 weeks in the summer and every second weekend we never have him in diapers. Our step son told me that his mom puts him in diapers at night time and he doesn't want to wear them. He has no problm at our house and I feel that the mother is just lazy if an accident was to occur to clean it up. He is 5 years old we potty trained him when he was 3 and he is doing great at our place. I brought this situation to his mother and her qoute was " I pick my fight wisely and I am not willing to pick this fight I don't want to do laundy and clean beds so this is what i do put him in diapers." Up untill he just turned five she was still giving him a bottle aqt night and sleeping with him to. I am worried because this conversation with his mother was when he was 4 I provided the mother with a pee mat and told her now she willn't have to clean a mattress if he does wet the bed. How ever I learned to day that his mom makes him wear diapers still I asked him why he don't tell his mom that he does'nt want to wear them he said he is scared she'll be mad. I sasked him how he feels wearing diapers ande of course he said Sad Very Said What Do I do I don't want to see him at the wrong point in live being a teenager. He is a very uneducated boy already in kindergarding he doesn't know how to count past 5 and doesn't know his ABC. I am so worried for his health and well being to get thought life, I called Child services and they say It is a father mother disput and they willn't get invovled.

Jan 13, 2011

@ anonymous (Oct 3)
by: Anonymous

My advice would be to continually reinforce the child's self-importance. Let him know that occasionally adults do not make the best decisions and that there is nothing wrong with him. Let him know that even if he doesn't need diapers that wearing them is OK. If he is going to be put in them anyway then I think it needs to be reinforced that wearing them is not the problem. I wouldn't advise getting into the details of whether he is subjected to abusive tactics as he will not be able to comprehend that. I suspect that his academic performance is directly linked to his self-esteem - which certainly will suffer from being put back in diapers. All you can really do is provide a positive environment where he understands that he is good and worthy and normal. Try everything to help him see himself in a positive manner.

Regarding picking battles - this is one to pick. The potential long term ramifications are brutal. However - if that is fruitless then the other option is as explained above - reinforce his self-worth as much as possible.

Jan 25, 2011

diaper punishment
by: Anonymous

I was put in a diaper as a punishment for messing and wettiing myself when I was around 5 years old. While it was only for 1 day I remember it to this day. I don't remember if the punishment worked but I will say the humiliation has lasted to this day. I still think about what happened and remember wanting to be put in a diaper until my early teens.

Feb 05, 2011

diapered for wetting the bed
by: Anonymous

I was about 6 or 7 when i was put back in diapers for wetting the bed at a baby sitters house.I was taking a nap,and woke up wet. The lady babysitter was not mad at me,but said she was going to have to diaper me so i could finish my nap.Then she preceded to the other room.When she returned,she had two cloth diapers,diaper pins and baby powder.At this point i started to cry.She said she was sorry and held me and comforted me until i stopped crying.Then she folded and laid the diapers on the livingroom floor.She then layed me on the diapers and powdered my diaper area before pinning it on me.She also used snap on plastic pants over my diaper.Then she said,there nice and dry for the rest of your nap.

Feb 06, 2011

diaper discipline
by: Anonymous

My father died when I was 8 years old.My mother had to take a job, and hired a retired nurse friend to move in and take care of me.
She was very strict and thats when I started wetting my bed.She immediately put me in diapers,and said you will have to wear them during the day too, until you get over this nasty habit.
This was before they had disposable diapers and plastic pants.so I had to wear thick, cloth diapers that she pinned on me,and strong rubber pants.I just hated them,because they were hot and bulky and their outline was clearly visible under my shorts.
Mother thought that having to wear them in the daytime was unnecessary but the nurse prevailed saying it was good disciplne and also prevented me from touching myself down there.
This lasted for three years,until mother retired from her job and fired the nurse.

Mar 06, 2011

Diaper Discipline
by: Judy McNamara

My son is 6 years old, turning 7 in November. He started grade 1 this year. He was born with hypospadias and because of this has a problem controlling his bladder. We explained his condition to his teacher and asked her to remind him to go to the toilet on an hourly basis, which is done at home successfully. The first couple of weeks at school we were told that he is coping well and has had no incidents. Recently we were informed that he is wetting his pants two to four times daily. On Friday I received a note from his teacher telling us to put him in pull-up diapers as the situation has become intolerable and has become progressively worse and she is concerned that it is not only affecting him but also the rest of the class. He has been home since 1pm on Friday afternoon, been to a birthday party and has been playing with friends during the weekend. We have had no incidents and he has not wet himself at all. He often goes to the toilet without any prompting from us. When we think he has not been, we just ask him "Is it time?" and he then goes to the toilet. Neither my husband nor I feel that putting him into diapers will be benificial to him as we are concerned that it would affect his emotional wellbeing and self esteem. He has a younger sibling who is already out of diapers as well. We do not want to humiliate him. He partakes in sport at school and has to change for these events with other classmates. We are concerned about his mates may tease him. Please could you give me some advice on how to deal with this situation. He is a very loving and sensitive child.

Mar 07, 2011

One Week
by: Anonymous

Mine was just one incident that lasted for a week. I had been staying at my aunt's while my mom was out of town for work (single mom) and my aunt was asked to watch me. I don't know why it happened but the first night there I wet the bed. My aunt called my mom that morning and asked about it. My mom talked to me after talking to my aunt and I was told to behave for my aunt tonight and while I was there. My aunt left for the store shortly after lunch and when she returned she asked me to come into the living room. My aunt told me she would not stand for me having accidents like this in her house and told me while I stayed there that I would have to wear diapers. I instantly got upset and said I didn't want to wear a diaper to bed, my aunt then said no not just to bed she said she didn't want to have to worry about this and I would be wearing them the whole time I was there. As I was standing there she began to take out what she had bought at the store, she had bought some of the cornstarch baby powder, diaper wipes and a package of regular disposable diapers. I guess I just didn't know what to do as she went to the bathroom and came back with a towel and laid it on the floor, she then opened the package of diapers and took one out and then told me to come over to her and lay down so she could put a diaper on me. I kinda just froze and started to back away from her, but not enough that I was out of her reach. My aunt then walked me over to the towel and brought me down to the floor as this happened I realized what was about to happen and started to cry. As my aunt started to remove my pants and underwear I really started to try to get back up and my aunt then held me down a little and said I needed to lay down and hold still.

Mar 07, 2011

One Week, the rest
by: Anonymous

From this point it was like I was just I didn't know what to do as she lifted my ankles up and slid the diaper under me, the next thing was the diaper wipes, I just shut my eyes and tried not to look at her. I can still remember the feeling of the diaper under me as she did the powder and then taped the diaper up. She ran her fingers around the legs of the diaper and then just said "there, done, that wasn't that hard was it" as I started to get up all I could do was look at the diaper and couldn't get a word out. My aunt told me to go ahead and get dressed and the said if I need my diaper changed to come get her. And to her word my aunt did have me wear the diapers night and day for the week I was there. I did only use them for wetting and she did have me tell her when I had to go #2 and she would take the diaper down so I could go to the bathroom, but she didn't let me use it for when I had to pee. Her comment was that's what your wearing a diaper for. After my mom got back and I was home my aunt sent the rest of the diapers and supplies home for my mom in case I still needed help potty training. Mom didn't ever have me wear a diaper at home after this but she didn't ever throw them out right then either, for a while she kept them on the top shelf in my closet and later put them in the hallway closet. I guess all I can say is I still cleary remember the happenings of that week and the feeling of embarrassment I felt having to wear baby diapers. I never really asked my aunt about this when I got older and still wondered why this was her choice of actions. I resented it but I don't really think it harmed me, it's just a bad memory.

From Darlene - Webmaster: You're here talking about diaper discipline, Anonymous. The humiliation and tears, the helplessness and powerlessness. This did you more harm than you realize. I hope you'll take the time to read all the comments on this thread, if you haven't already. You'll be able to relate to many of them.

Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

Apr 05, 2011

A fetisher's view.
by: Anonymous

Now, before you all discount this as just another fetisher looking to get off, it isn't.

I have never gone through diaper discipline. It was threatened to me by my father once, but in an off-handed manner ("You don't want me to do that, do you?") after I'd wet the bed at age 6.

I think that sparked the idea for my fetish, but I came to like it on my own, and as such, I am not ashamed of it in the slightest.

Either way, my point is: although I am a fetisher, have never gone through it, and I actually get off to stories, as in fiction, on this subject, I would never even think of actually doing this.

If my parents had done this, especially as a teenager, when my fetish was fully realized and accepted, I more than likely would have murdered my parents and gone to jail (I had access to guns from the age of 13.)

It is the fact that I have the fetish that is the reason I would never do this to my kid, and why I would have murdered my parents. It is sexual to me, and so would be the equivalent of sexual abuse/rape to me.

I am truly disgusted by the thought of someone having to go through this, and having to endure the after-effects of it. It is the equivalent of rape. Many girls come to have rape fetishes after being raped, take my fiancee, for example, and this is no different. God help the parents of any child I find out this is being done to. The law will only be my first step.

Apr 18, 2011

As a child
by: Anonymous

I was put into care back in the 60's in a hostal at Chesterfield, I was 7 when I went there first and while I was waiting in the hallway I wet myself because I was scared a very nice matron come and told another lady to clean me up she bathed me then put me into a terry nappie (diaper)and plastic panties that was my first of many encounters with dressed so.
I was to stay in the home till I was 13 and it has now left me with a longing to be dressed in a nappie so it had a big inpact on me, although im married and my wife is very kind I could not tell her my feeling I will take it to my grave.

May 18, 2011

the mind boggles....
by: My Two Cents

Wow, where to start?

The story from scars from childhood, your mom was an RN?! From what you wrote she just jumped straight to the most humilating punishment she could think of...like I wrote above the mind boggles. That's so far beyond cruel...

The other story, the one about the boy given diapers at his b-day and then publicly put into them in front of all his friends by mom and older sisters,this crap is just *shudders*

I just can't....umm, believe how creative some people can be when finding ways to hurt kids. I really can't believe the whole class just blindly accepted what happened...

I'd never heard of this "diaper discipline" before so I googled it. Sigh. It's not an april fool's day joke, is it?

I am a little puzzled as to why it never came up in my social work texts on child abuse, nor petticoat discipline which seems like the same thing. We covered neglect, sex, and physical abuse. I think "emotional" abuse was starting to be accepted?

Bah.

I hope people who did this are not involved with child care in any manner in the 2000's.

Be well.

My Two Cents.

Jun 08, 2011

crazy security in dumb method
by: Anonymous

As a kid I had the problem of the hypospadious which made bathroom trips hell for me the scars of being diapered for "laziness are still with me its crazy the strange how it hasn't faded.

Jun 20, 2011

It is definately rape
by: Anonymous

Hello, my story does not vary that much from the rest of you...I was adopted and put into diapers because I wet the bed at four, and it continued. It was back in the early sixties, no disposable diapers, so the bulk and humiliation was deeper with those cloth diapers. I remember my mother diapering me, calling me baby, and her face getting beet red, as she prolonged the diapering process. I realize now, that she was getting aroused in a sick, twisted way. The fine lines make it so hard, now they call it child abuse and rightfully so, back then, we simply called it the fifties/sixties. ....a different era in so many ways as far as child upbringing. To trust someone so completely only to be betrayed, and to have them do such an intimate, humiliating act is rape of every sort, for what is rape but a violation of your body? I now still have the fetish fantasies, and it seems as if once you get that, the more you try to shrug it off, the more it follows you, stalks you. It spawns off self-hatred, low self esteem, secret keeping, lying, so many other things. If there are any parents out there doing this or considering doing it, I assure you: I am a walking mess. I will carry this pain and shame to my grave. Thank God for this sort of site that brings all this out in the open. I apologize for having been so lengthy. Thankyou, and may God bless you each in your special journey.

Jul 15, 2011

diaper abuse
by: warren

When I was ten years old my mother died and my father remarried.My stepmother was a nurse and was very strict with me.
For some I started wetting my bed and she put me in diapers and rubber pants.She then told me that since I was acting like a baby,she was going to keep me in diapers 24/7.
I remember the diapers were made of cloth and were very thick and bulky.She pinned them on me very tightly The pants were made of thick pink rubber,and were very hot.I hated them,because th the outline could easily be seen under my shorts
She told my father they were necessary to protect against accidents,and to prevent me playing with myself.

Jul 15, 2011

Thought I Was Alone - THANK YOU
by: Anonymous

So many stories and expressed feelings of the encounter(s) align with mine. My single experience was like a rape (as indicated by one author). I had no choice but to be humiliated and 'take it.' I had actually blocked it from my memory for several years and in later grade school I suddenly remembered it. I, too, had strange combinations of strong resentment and anger towards my parent but an equally shameful desire for it to occur again. I would fantasize about it not realizing I was sexualizing it. It messed me up. I am now a recovering alcoholic (over 5 years sober!) after 20 active years. I am not saying this one incident spurred my use of alcohol and drugs, but I cannot deny how greatly it impacted me in my choices, actions and behaviors. Also, while I had seen therapists off and on throughout my adult life and was even hospitalized in my early 20s for severe depression, I never did then nor have I EVER opened up about this due to the immense amount of shame I still feel. It is so hard to communicate and THIS is my first time to do so...and I can still only do so anonymously. I am sincerely grateful for this site - I really thought I was totally alone. Thank you.

Nov 05, 2011

diaper punishment
by: julie

Iam a female age 26 and went thru diaper discipline when i was teen girl.even tho i wasnt a bedwetter,starting at age 13 i was put into cloth diapers and rubberpants and a tee shirt when i misbehaved.the punishment always lasted a week and as soon as i got home from school,i had to take off my clothes and lay on my bed while my mom put the diapers and rubberpants on me and i had to wear them for the evenings and to bed and all the time on the weekend.i felt embarrassed going to church on sundays with the diapers and rubber pants on under my dress.this punishment lasted untill i was 16 and came to an end ironically on my confirmation day.i got into trouble the week before my confirmation and was under going the diaper punishment that week.on the sunday of my confirmation,the diapers and rubberpants were put on me along with my white dress,veil,etc.after the ceremony i went to use the rest room and there was a woman in there and heard me pulling down the rubber pants and taking the diaper off.after i did my business,i pinned the diapers back on and pulled the rubber pants back up and came out of the stall.the woman asked me if i had rubber pants on,that she heard them crinkling,and i said yes that i had a diaper on under them and she asked me why i was wearing them and i told her my parents make me wear them as punishment.she got all upset and we went out and she found my parents and told them she would report them to the police if they didnt stop making me wear them for punishment.they agreed to stop and that was the last time i wore them!

Nov 12, 2011

i was also diaper disciplined when young
by: Anonymous

i was goimg into first grade, my brother and i acted up when my mother was signing me up, she took us home spanked us and then put us in diapers for the rest of the day and next day. ive been messed up since then, mentally and physically. till this day i have medical problems and the doctors say there is nothing wrong with me.

Dec 08, 2011

Enemas were reinforcement to go to school
by: ArrZee

I have struggled with this for years? why would my mother do this?

When I was in Sixth grade I was having some issues at school, no bullying more of being ignored or excluded. so I found that I didn't want to go to school. I would complain to my mother that I didn't want to go to school because my stomach hurt. so mom took me too doctor and found nothing. but somehow during one day I was given a choice of going to school or enema. so to avoid school I would take the enema. This went on for weeks. I would go to school and then decide not to go. but would then get a forced enema. the worse part was my mom was too cheap so she would mix a batch of soap and water a whole rubber thermos ( red thing). then it finally stopped. Then one day When I was a teenager, my mother stopped me before leaving the house. she made my lie down with my head in her lap and she would pop my acne (zits). This went on for years. why would a mother do this? I have kids of my own now and would never ever dream of doing this to them. it's sound like abuse? Or am I overreacting.? This doesn't sound normal. This happened in the 70s?

Dec 28, 2011

diapers at school
by: Anonymous

up front, i am a diaper lover but i think it is the result of diaper discipline. also, i do not approve of diaper discipline.

my mother worked at a daycare years before i was born. i don't believe my mother was a diaper lover though because she never used diaper discipline on me until second grade.

i hated public bathrooms (who really prefers them right?) and while i had no problems going number 1 in the school bathrooms i didn't like the idea of sitting down on a public toilet and the idea of back-splash while sitting on a public toilet really freaked me out.

as a result of my near-phobia of public toilet seats i would choose to hold it instead of asking to go to the bathroom when i needed to go number 2. as a result of this holding it, i occasionally had accidents where i would soil myself and even sometimes drop what my mother called rabbit pellets.

in kindergarten, first, and most of second grade my mother would simply bring me a change of underwear and pants and give them to me to change into at the school's nurses office.

however, one day (your no fool, you know where this story is going) instead of bringing me a change of underwear and pants, my mother signed me out instead, and then in the back of our station wagon after many screams, cries, hand-smacks, kicks, tears, and a bottom spanking, i found out that i could still fit into a disposable baby diaper.

my mother then forcibly helped me back into my pants and shoes, walked me back to the principles office, signed me back in, and then walked me to my classroom.

after the school bell my mother was waiting for me outside the classroom where she walked me back to the car. in hind sight i believe she was making sure i didn't go off to the bathrooms and take the diaper off, at the time i (oddly) didn't even think of taking the diaper off.

when i asked if i could take the diaper off i was told no, when i asked how long i had to wear it i was informed that i would be wearing diapers until i could prove that i would poop my pants. when i asked how long that would be, i was informed that i would have to wear the whole pack of diapers (that my mother had apparently bought before picking me up from school) without having an accident. it was a 66 count box of diapers and i was usually only changed twice a day (before school and before bed)

i remember the fear and embarrassment i felt when the other kids didn't know, and then one of my friends noticed and after asking me if i was wearing a diaper and i telling him i wasn't he slapped my bottom.

eventually the other kids found out, and some would even ask me if i was wearing them (some would ask me in order to teas me in front of other kids, while others would actually come up and ask me in a whisper) and my nick name became diaper-boy or that-diaper-boy, until high school, where i was only called it occasionally by a few select bullies.

Jan 28, 2012

My Sisters Diaper Disciplined Me
by: Anonymous

I am the fourth child of six children. When I was seven years old, my brother was 17, and my two older sisters were 15 and 12, and my younger brother was two. My youngest brother hadn't been born yet.

Both of my parents worked at a mill, and it was not uncommon for both of my parents to be gone all night. In our home the older children were responsible for taking care of the younger children all the time, but especially when our parents weren't home.

My oldest brother could drive and was never home, which meant my two older sisters would babysit my brother and I.

One day when I was seven I got into an argument with my 12 year old sister over the TV Remote. I smacked and hit my sister and she hit me back so hard I started crying. When my oldest sister came into the living room and asked what happened, I in my crying voice said, "She won't let me watch my show."

My 12 year old sister said, "Quit acting like such a baby." and I hit her and tried to take the remote again. My 12 year old sister said, "No, don't!" and shook her finger at me, "You know better than to hit or are you a baby?" and every time she said the word baby, she gave it a bit of inflection.

I hit her and reached for the remote again and my 12 year old sister smacked me and said, "No, babies hit!" and my 15 year old sister who was right there said if I keep acting like a spoiled little brat I'll regret it.

I called her bluff and punched my 12 year old sister as hard as I could in her stomach. She cringed in pain and I grabbed the remote.

My 15 year old sister pulled me off the couch and pinned me to the floor by sitting on my chest with her back to me. She then tried to pull my pants off, and enlisted my 12 year old sister for help. I struggled and tried to fight while the two of them stripped my lower half and then put a diaper on me.

When my sister got off of me I pulled the diaper off. She wrestled me back down to the floor and they put it back on me. It turn into a game, I would get up and try to take it off and the two of them would stop me or put it or a new one back on me. Finally, after putting it back on me for the fourth or fifth time my sister turned around to face me but kept me pinned to the floor.

I begged her to get off of me, but she refused. I struggled but I was trapped. After a while she told me that she would let me up if I promised to behave, I agreed.

She got off of me and I got up and pulled the diaper off. She wrestled me down to the floor again, and the two of them diapered me again. She then said I could get up if I promised to behave and not take off the diaper. I promised.

After that, every time either of my sisters found an excuse to say I was acting like a baby, one or both of them would put a diaper on me. This kept up until I was almost 10 years old when my younger brother was potty trained and my parents no longer bought diapers.

Feb 13, 2012

STEP MOM ABUSED ME part 1
by: Luke D.

My parents got divorced when I was about 6 years old. My father moved to a different state so I didn't get to see him much. He got remarried when I was 8 years old.

The summer of my 9th summer I flew down to stay with my father and new step mother. And also my two step brothers.

One of my step brothers is named G-- and is few years older then me, and the other is named L-- and is my age. I had to share a room with L-- who had a bunk bed and wet the bed. But I didn't know he wet the bed.

My first night at my dad's my step mother sent me out of the room so L-- could get ready for bed. I did not know why but she had an upset tone with me when I tried to figure out why.

The next day when L-- and I were playing with G.I. Joes and Legos I found a Diaper Genie in the closet and a package of size 6 diapers. I asked L-- about them and he told me they were for his cousin who would visit some times. I could tell he was lying though and suspected they were for him.

That night my step mom sent me out of the room so L-- could get ready for bed again, and I had a pretty good idea of what was going on. After I was allowed back into the room and my step mom had left, I went to the closet and saw the diaper package had been opened. I asked L-- why the package was opened and he said his mom was just checking to make sure nothing was wrong with them.

I happened to wake up before L-- the next morning but laid in bed for a while. After a long time but I don't know how long, I decided to pretend to be asleep and watch L-- get out of bed. When he did I could tell he was wearing a diaper.

Later that night, the third night, I after L-- got ready for bed I checked the diapers again and most of the package was gone. I asked L-- where the diapers went, he said his mom gave them to his cousin. I said I didn't see his cousin come over. He told me I missed him. I opened his dresser and found diapers inside. I told L-- I knew he was wearing a diaper. L-- called me a liar. I called him a liar back.

My step mom came into the room and asked what was going on. L-- told his mom I called him a baby because he has to wear diapers, and that I threatened to tell all the kids on the street about it.

I had not said any of that, and I called him a liar again. My step mom said, "Is that so?" to L--, and he said, "Yeah." I said he was a liar.

My step mom grabbed me by the wrist and jerked me really hard. She then pulled my hair and held my face to her face and said, "You want to make fun of him? You want to tell the kids on the street he wears diapers?" I said, "No." She said, "You can tell them if you want to."

She let go of my hair and started to rub confused at what she had just said. She grabbed my pants and really quickly pulled them down and pulled my feet out from under me. I landed on the air mattress that I was sleeping on and before I could do anything she had my pants off of me.

Feb 13, 2012

STEP MOM part 2
by: Luke D.

She then opened the closet door and pulled a diaper out of the diaper bag. She then said, "You can tell them that you wear them too." She started to put a diaper on me, I screamed "No!" and tried to push the diaper away, but she smacked my hands really hard every time I tried and said, "Move your hands or I'll smack them again."

She then put the diaper on me. I cried. She told me to lay down and go to sleep and taking my undies and pants with her left the room and turned off the light. I ended up crying myself to sleep in pain from her smacks and hair pulling, and ashamed.

The next day when I woke up I did not want to get out of bed. I noticed the diaper and did not want to go downstairs with just a pajama shirt and a diaper. I also did not want to go downstairs naked. I ended up walking downstairs using my blanket like a robe.

My dad was at the breakfast table and said he had heard what had happened. He said then told me that he and my step mom decided it would be best if I wore diapers while I was visiting. I asked, "Why?" and my dad said it was so I wouldn't make fun of my brother.

I told him I wouldn't make fun of him, and my dad said, "I'm sure you wouldn't but your step mom is afraid you will, and this way you both share something in common."

The diapers were too small for me, and they would sometimes use tape to help them stay on. I never used the diapers, and never wore diapers again after I flew back home to my mothers.

I didn't tell my mother about what had happened that summer until I was much older. My dad and my step mom got divorced a few years later and I've never seen my step brothers since.

Feb 18, 2012

i was forced to wear diapers and raped
by: Anonymous

i see some of you saying that being forced to wear diapers is like being raped, but as someone who's mom used to sometimes force me to wear a wet diaper all day because i wet it the night before and was raped by my first boyfriend i can tell you they are not the same at all.

many of you say you like to wear diapers even now, i also like to wear diapers even now, but i don't want to be raped again.

i don't walk down the street thinking every teenage boy or man might grab me and force me into a diaper like my mother did. i don't have nightmares about the times my mother made me answer the door for two girls selling girl scout cookies wearing a wet diaper and t shirt. being forced to wear diapers didn't make the idea of having sex with someone frightening, painful, and disgusting or make me consider becoming a lesbian because the idea of having a man inside me makes me want to throw up and claw his eyes out. and while being diapered didn't exactly make me feel clean, it also did not make me feel dirty the way being raped did.

Feb 22, 2012

i don't like public toilets either
by: Anonymous

the earliest memory i have is when me mom took me to a poo covered public toilet room, me second earliest memory is of the time me mom put me back into a nappy when i was about three or four. i don't remember ever being having a nappy on or being changed, or really any events in me life before that day.

so this one time when i was about three or four me mom and i were at the mall and i had to go poo but also needed to pee of course, as is usual when you have to go poo. i didn't want to go to the public toilet because i thought they were yucky. so i waited until i couldn't hold it any more and pissed me self.

even though i know why today, when me mom asked me why i didn't tell her i had to use the loo i could only reply to her that i didn't know.

so me mom handed her shopping to the cashier in the store and asks the lady to hold onto it for her while she took me to the toilet. on the way to the toilets me mom stops a lady who has three little ones of her own and asked if she could spare a nappy. the lady started to say something leading up to a polite "no", but agreed when me mom offered to pay a pound.

i wasn't stupid and started to make a fuss strait away. me mom thanked the lady and pulled me by the arm to a baby change area by the toilets. just a marble looking counter built into the wall. i really started balling and making noise when me mom pulled me pants down. she saw that i had a little poo on me too and used a dry part of me panties and some tissue from her purse to clean me up a bit before putting the nappy on me.

i screamed the whole way back out to the mall, but me mom said that the more i acted up the more people would be looking at me. i stopped fussing and started crying and pleading at that point. me mom told me to pipe down and it was only until we got home. i stopped crying for the most part and me mom picked me up and carried me back to the shop where me mom asked the cashier for a bag to put me dirties in.

i was embarrassed of course, and me mom didn't stop shopping at that store either. i can't remember how many but we went to several more stores, one of which was a toy shop.

two or three stores after the toy shop i still had to go poo. not wanting to go to the public toilets and since i was already wearing a nappy, i pooed me self and quickly discovered it was a bad mistake.

it not only smelled really bad but was uncomfortable. it didn't take long for me mom to figure out what happened. she went all ballistic and said it was like having an infant again. both embarrassed me mom picked me up and left the mall. she yelled and fussed at me the whole way back to the car, i can only remember crying and saying i was sorry.

when we got home me mom gave me a bath and put me back into cloth training pants which i hadn't wore since i was potty trained. i don't remember anything after that point from around that age.

Feb 25, 2012

Forced Regression
by: Anonymous

I don't remember what I did wrong, but I can remember several times when I was about five years old my dad treating me like a baby. It went something like this:

I was crying my eyes out and saying, "I don't want to wear a diaper."

While my dad put a diaper on me and said, "If you're going to act like a baby, then you're going to get treated like one."

After putting a diaper one me he'd put me on his lap, hold me tightly with one arm, and shove a bottle in between my lips and ordered me to drink. I think it was baby formula or it could have been breast milk, I don't know, but it tasted nasty. He would hold me tightly so I couldn't wiggle free and keep ordering me to drink, if I stopped, until the whole bottle was empty.

After the bottle was empty he'd put a cloth over his shoulder and burp me. Then he would lay me down in my brother's play pen and say it was nap time.

If stood up he'd pick me up and lay me back down and say something like, "Close your eyes, it's nap time."

Eventually I'd fall asleep. When I woke up he'd keep me in the play pen. If I tried to climb out, he'd stop me and/or put me back in. If I told him I had to use the potty he'd usually ignore me, but sometimes he'd say, "That's why babies wear diapers." If I used the diaper and and told him he'd ignore me, if I used the diaper and didn't tell him he'd leave me sitting in it, but if I cried he'd pick me up out of the play pen and change me like a baby.

If I cried at all he'd change my diaper, even if it wasn't dirty.

After changing my diaper he'd give me another bottle of either juice or formula, usually formula, but he wouldn't force me to drink it.

I don't know what I did to cause my father to treat me that way any of the time that he did. I can't remember how many times he did that too me, but it was more than three.

Now, I'm what is called an Adult Baby (or AB). I like to dress up like a baby, diaper and all, and drink baby formula from a bottle. I remember it was a nasty taste when my father used to force me to drink it, but I guess the taste grew on me because I like the taste of baby formula now.

I don't recommend parents do this to their kids. My habit is expensive. Adult diapers aren't cheap, heck baby formula isn't cheap, and more over even though I like to do this stuff I still find it embarrassing. I suspect that being an AB is a lot like being gay, or more like being gay used to be. I'm a closet AB. My friends and family don't know about it, and right now I don't want them to find out. I hope to find a woman who's into it, but its difficult because I don't really know the best way to go about bring the subject up. I'm still a virgin actually, and I'm in my mid 20s, and I think its because I'm an AB that I don't have a normal interest in sex.

Mar 03, 2012

WHAT??????
by: Anonymous

ALl I can say is no wonder we have so many killers out there! Thanks abusive moms..NO EXCUSE!!

Mar 05, 2012

I don't think so..
by: Anonymous

It seems the 'side effect' of diaper discipline seems to be people becoming diaper lovers. This is bad in its own way, as one above says he's still a virgin because of it, and another says he pays a dominatrix. Some think it lowers a child self esteem.

However, I don't think diaper discipline creates killers. It creates some lasting scars, but no one who's posted here or anywhere I've seen on this topic says they want to kill anyone.

There is a video about a girl who murders her mother because of diaper discipline that used to be on YouTube and you might be able to find it around, but I have some thoughts about that video I won't share here.

Diaper Discipline is bad. Its abusive. However, it is sadly one type of abuse. This website covers all sorts of abuse, read the other pages on this site. There are plenty of abuses that can create killers, but I doubt really truly doubt this is one of them.

I am against diaper discipline. I'm not trying to say it is good. All abuse is bad. We just shouldn't start assuming any of the people who posted here are killers. That's prejudice and unfair to the posters. They have enough to deal with, we don't need to call them killers.

Mar 06, 2012

Diaper Discpline
by: Anonymous

You ever notice many stores put cereal in the same isle with diapers? I'm told its because they want children to see the bright colorful boxes and ask for cereal while their parents are buying them diapers.

I was a spoiled four year old. My dad worked at a factory and my mother was a 'home maker'. My mother and father didn't believe in spanking and didn't seem to know any other form of behavior modification, so I was a spoiled little brat, or at least so my parents tell me.

I would throw tantrums in stores if my parents didn't buy me the toy, candy, or cereal I wanted. It got to the point that my mother didn't want to take my shopping.

Well, one weekend or something my father took me shopping while my mother was away somewhere. We were in the cereal isle and I decided I wanted a box of Fruit Loops for the toy in it. My father told me we had enough cereal at home already. I began screaming and throwing a tantrum as usual. My dad of course told me to pipe down and stop making a scene. I was unrelenting, as I knew (or at least thought) if I kept screaming I'd get what I wanted.

I remembering thinking the four year old equivalent of 'what the hell?' when my father grabbed a package of diapers off the shelf opposite the cereal and threw them hardily into the cart and then with great speed pushed the cart (and me in it) to the check out. He told the lady, "Just these." and handed the package to the lady at the check out, she rang them up and my father said, "I'll be back for these." while pointing at the cart. She told him the price, he paid, and then taking the bag with the diapers in them from the lady and then hoisting a now quite and puzzled me from the cart went for the grocery store door.

I started screaming and crying again saying "I want cereal!" over and over.

When we got to the car, my father opened the back door and laid me out on the back seat. I tried to sit up, but he pushed me back down, unbuttoned my pants, pulled down my pants and under ware, and when I realized what was happening I started crying in earnest.

My father said if I was going to act like a baby I was going to be treated like one, and wrestled me into the diaper. After the diaper was on, he took off my shoes, pants, and underwear. Then after putting my shoes back on me, picked me up, locked the car door, closed it, and carried me back into the grocery store.

I was too embarrassed to cry very loud. I remember looking around at the people in the parking lot, and in the cars driving by, and hiding my face in my fathers shoulder. I cried into his shoulder and promised I would be good, but my father ignored me.

Once back inside, my father found the cart and put me back into the child seat. The lady at the check out smiled at me and winked, and I remember thinking that was strange. My father went back to shopping, I just sniffled and zoned out.

Mar 06, 2012

Diaper Discipline
by: Anonymous

Diapers became my parents regular threat and form of punishment after that. A whole power struggle between me and them happened after that. I began wetting and pooing in them on purpose as revenge for wearing them, and my parents started leaving me in the dirty ones as their retaliatory volley. I would take them off and leave them, dirty, sitting in the living room, and then my parents began using duct tape (which didn't stop me), and then footed pajamas, etc.

When I was about 7 my parents told a baby sitter to diaper me if I miss behaved and she did when I didn't get ready for bed fast enough, I think she enjoyed it. When I was 8 my parents really humiliated me by putting me in a diaper in front of my cousin who was staying the night because we were up talking to each other instead of sleeping. They also threatened to diaper him, but didn't.

Now, I'm an adult baby.

Mar 30, 2012

My babysitter mad me a diaper lover!
by: Anonymous

My mom would drop me off at my babysitters house and as soon as my mom drove away she would put me in a diaper even though I was potty trained. She told me it was so I didn't make fun of the other kids or make them feel bad.

My mom almost always called about 15 to 20 minutes before she came to pick me up, and the babysitter would change me back into my normal pants.

It was a long time, like almost a year or so, before I told my mom about it. The babysitter tried to tell my mom it was because I was having accidents, but my mom didn't believe her and found me a new babysitter.

Apr 28, 2012

Rude Awakening!
by: Ben

About a week before my eighth birthday I fell asleep on the couch with a cup of orange juice in my hand and woke up on the floor with my father putting a diaper on me. I had spilled the orange juice and the cup had some how ended up under the couch so he didn't see it. He thought I had wet the couch and I don't know how I didn't notice.

I had no idea what was going on when I woke up. My pants were down and a diaper was being taped onto me. I asked my father why and he said, "If you're going to piss yourself like a baby then you can wear a diaper like a baby!"

It took a while for me to figure it out, but when I did I told him it was orange juice. I found the cup under the couch and showed him, but then his response was, "Then I guess the lesson is: Don't spill stuff on my couch." and he walked off with my pants.

May 20, 2012

Just sick!!!
by: JR

I am not a victim of this, however if my parents had ever done that to me, I would cut them out of my life for good. They would no longer exist in my mind. I honestly question the sanity [as well as the love that they have for their child] if they would have them endure this type of humiliation!

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Diaper Discipline, Child Abuse and Secrets

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Diaper Discipline, Child Abuse and Secrets