Comments for Miss My Brother

Click here to add your own comments

Jan 03, 2018
 To Paul:
by: Darlene - Healing Coach

You very pointedly speak to what so many sexual abuse survivors go through: conflicting feelings of love and hate. Your brother was your brother, and you have memories of that special relationship. Then your brother became the abuser, and it's the abuser and all abuse that went with it, that you hate. All logical stuff, but it's the emotional stuff that is so difficult to deal with.

None of what happened is your fault, Paul. Neither the abuse, nor his suicide. He chose BOTH himself. Your threat to tell was not a sword to his throat, it was a line drawn in the sand.

I suspect there is a lot more going on with your internal dialogue, perhaps feelings of guilt as you examine your motives at the time. But here's what you need to remember: Your brother's final act ultimately continues to control you. He controlled you with the abuse. And now, he's controlling you from the grave. Only you get to decide if that stops.

Thank you for sharing your story here. And I send you loving healing energy.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Jan 24, 2018
 Miss my Father
by: James

You did what many abuse victims must have to do to protect themselves. You are not at fault for saying what you did and I cannot see what else you could have done. Your brother might have killed himself later out of guilt at what he had done to you over the years.

My heart does go out to you and I hope that you will be able to talk about this soon. Keeping it a secret will prevent you from getting support. I think your brother regretted what he did and would have wanted you to be supported.

For me, my father soon went abroad to work when I started asking him over breakfast why he came to my room in the night. I was 13 and had had enough of coming home from school with a sore bottom and stained underwear. I thought of other options in retrospect, but my intention to expose was the correct one and it protected my sister as well as me.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Write Your Child Abuse Story.

Return to Miss My Brother

Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



E-book: Victim To Victory

From Victim to Victory
a memoir

How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life

Read more...

Most Recent

RSS

  1. Converging Stolen Lives

    Jan 30, 18 01:13 PM

    There was a time and space I didn’t think about you, or your abuse. Where when I looked back at my life, I only saw normal things, a normal childhood.

    Read More

  2. A letter to one of the 13 Turpin children

    Jan 29, 18 11:33 AM

    A heartfelt letter by a former classmate that speaks to bullying and regrets. You'll find it on my Facebook group. I hope you'll join and get in on the discussion.

    Read More

  3. Dissociated From Abuse

    Jan 29, 18 11:00 AM

    I was sexually abused by my father from age 6 to 13, which stopped when I started talking about it during the day. The teenage brother of my best friend

    Read More

E-book: Victim To Victory

From Victim to Victory
a memoir

How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life

Read more...