by Allie L
Child Abuse is a vicious cycle of repeated events!!! Isn't it ironic? when I was a teenager, my father—leading insurance agent for 25 years, musician band leader, active with the Chicago musician's union—anyway...when I was 15 years old, my father's drummer—also a powerful Chicago Attorney—we will call him Alex, anyway...I would visit them on Jewish "Gigs" (weddings, Bar Mitzvahs' etc.). Alex would get me high on Marijuana and wine! I didn't even like or condone illegal drugs and I do not use them today. Then Alex would have sexual intercourse with me. He threatened me to not tell (I feel that the marijuana was tampered with, similar to the effects of a "date rape drug!") When I did tell the counselors, my parents, my Rabbi; they all believed me. However, they were in denial.
They encouraged me to "sweep this under the carpet" to keep peace within the Jewish community. So I did, resulting in me internalizing this to a point of having a nervous breakdown. I had a lot of anger and I wanted to castrate Alex. I then utilized this anger.
I finished high school, then I went off to college, majoring in Chemistry. I was a research scientist for years. Now I teach public school.
The worst thing is that I can now deal with the pain when it happened to me, however, now my own child was sexually abused.
After my divorce 14 years ago—my daughters were 3 and 4 at the time—I started dating a Ph.D professor of the business department at a university. I will call him Harry. He was in the process of suing the university because he hated women, particularly black women referring them to "niggers with attitudes!" An African American Dean of his department earned more money than him, so he misconstrued, lied, manipulated, and sued the university stating that this woman was against him. The university knew that he was at fault, so to avoid negative publicity, they settled just to "get rid of him".
At a family function, my 4-year-old started crying stating that Harry hit her on her vagina repeatedly and he stuffed pure Jalapeno peppers into her mouth. My mother witnessed both incidents, therefore, my mother phoned the police and Harry left the state of Illinois to teach at a university in West Virginia. Again, we swept this under the table.
My 4-year-old is now 18. She finished two years of college, (she completed high school in two years by age 16) she is captain of her junior college cheer squad, and she wants to transfer to a four-year university to become a Psychologist and then off to Medical School to become a Psychiatrist. I feel that she is more gifted in literature, debate and law, so I began researching universities online and found out that a university in South Carolina would be a good option for her. Ironically, Dr. Harry, the Ph.D business professor who molested my 18-year-old is the Dean of Business at this university in South Carolina. This made me violently ill.
I cannot sleep, eat, I have been vomiting. I am wondering if he has molested his own daughters (now in their 20's) or any other young impressionable and vulnerable girls. Every few years, this professor jumps around teaching and or is the Dean of business for different universities. First in Illinois, then in West Virginia, next in the central valley of California, and currently in South Carolina.
My daughter has a great deal of anger and animosity directed at me for "sweeping this under the carpet and not following through with my mother's molestation/rape report" against Professor Harry Ph.D. I don't blame my daughter for her anger. I know what she is feeling and what she is going through. And to top it off, I learned that Professor Harry Ph.D married wife #3 or #4. He met her while living and teaching college in the Central Valley of California; ironically, she is a former assistant D.A. who specializes in rape cases. They currently live in South Carolina and she has a law practice in Myrtle Beach. There is nothing that I can do legally, since Professor Harry Ph.D and his attorney wife are on a "power trip!"
I will attend therapy with my daughter. I don't know what more my daughter and I do can to alleviate the pain.
Darlene's comments to this Child Abuse Commentary "Child Molestation/Rape is a Vicious Cycle...REPORT to POLICE!" can be found at Comments below this submission. Depending on system activity, there are sometimes delays in comments going live on my site; but rest assured, they do eventually appear. So if you don't yet see them, I hope you will return later to read what I, and possibly others, have written. I thank you for your patience and understanding.
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