Comments for Child Abuse Story From Darlene C

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Apr 20, 2009
Part 1: Honest and powerful...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

A very honest and powerful post, Darlene. The fact that you didn't act on your urge to strike your son shows your strength of character. While those feelings that welled up in you were as a result of the childhood abuse you suffered, you did not allow the cycle to continue. You didn't just show restraint, you showed self discipline by removing yourself from the situation so as to ensure the safety of your son. During a time of rage you STILL had the presence of mind to do what was best for your son. Then you went the next step...you sought the help you needed. I know this was a long time ago, but I hope you give yourself the credit you have due. The choices you've made in your life clearly show that you've turned pain into power. You're showing that each and every day by enriching the life of your granddaughter, showing her how much she is loved and cherished. I applaud you, Darlene. And I commend you for the work you've chosen to do helping abused children and their families.

Sharing your story here will most definitely help others. Much like Jane's, your story has the power to change the lives of many who visit here. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

P.S. Darlene, I believe I now understand what you have been trying to achieve with this post and others you've sent through my comments page. I gather you've been trying to connect with Jane from the page on my site that is an exchange between her and me. I have gone to my comments page and re-read what I have there that would cause confusion. I now understand...I take responsibility for the confusion; and will be updating that page in the next day or two in an effort to make the page more visitor friendly.

See Part 2: In hopes of clearing up a misconception... below.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Apr 20, 2009
Part 2: In hopes of clearing up a misconception...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

The exchange I had with Jane occurred more than 2 years ago. I posted it in the way I did in order to offer it as a teaching tool for my visitors, at a time when I did not have the ability to have visitors comment directly to a contributor. I doubt very much that Jane is a regular visitor to this site, especially in light of my responses to her. I therefore don't know if she'll ever read what you've written, but I decided to keep your comments to her intact because they may benefit my other visitors who do read this page. You'll note I've included a link to the page where that exchange is detailed. If I'm mistaken about this, please let me know by posting a comment on this page so that I can remove the link.

Allow me to offer an explanation for the way my site operates with regard to comments...

Comments on this site can only be done in one of two ways: by using the comment form box that is a part of my Comments Page, a page where general site comments are posted (for which there is no way to reply, and no way to know to whom one is commenting to). This was the way you commented last week. This was an older system, but one that I continue to use for more generic comments.

The second way is by commenting on the individual stories, commentaries and articles on this site (called submission pages) that have been generated through the various invitation pages I have throughout the site. Submission pages always have a link on them that take the visitor to a specific comment page. The wording on those links reads: Click here to add your own comments. In other words, each submission page has its own comments form. This is to ensure that comments go to the appropriate page and therefore the appropriate person.

My comments page has been a part of my site since I first created it. The other interactive submission pages have only been operational since August 18, 2007, when the module I use for such pages became available. This means that anything posted prior to that date does not have an interactive capability attached to it. Therefore, there is no way to communicate with Jane through this site. I hope this clears up the misconception of who you were writing to when you sent your comments last week. Again, I apologize for the confusion.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir


Apr 20, 2009
Helping other abused children Baby James Foundation
by: Maurice

It is the greatest of theraphy for us who were abused is for us to help and emphatise with others who were abused. I through my work meet quite a number of abused and when I tell them I was there, that happened to me, I wore the T-Shirt. Immediately they become aware this is one who will listen and know what I am sharing with him. Darlene C, good on you, covering up welts after a beating is a thing I can identify with as I had to after the spanking or leathering I received. even though the rest of the boys were aware and knew the marks were ther I always wanted to hide mine. Helping pthers to help themselves is a great and wonderful gift Darlene. You're truly a special person.Nice to have a mam who loved you and whom you loved. Keep up your great efforts as Vice President of the baby James Foundation. Darlen's site is a Haven, a cushion to comfort oneself by telling one's abuse story, she's great at offering words of love and support, I have found her site theraputic and a great help especially when I read her visitors honest telling of their stories. For me knowing she too came through the world of abuse and was helped by professional to the leve she knew it would be good to have a site for others to share their stories in trust and confidence. Annonomous though we all are we know there is a feeling human being making a comment on our abuse story out there

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Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



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