Words of Courage

by Kristina M.
(Alberta, Canada)

I got molested once when I was 5. I never told anyone, but I don't talk to him anymore. I just want to say a couple of words or sentences, and hopefully they'll help you heal.


Forgiveness is the best type of revenge. If you forgive the person who wronged you, then you'll feel free and unburdened. They will leave your minds.

It is not up to us to pass judgement onto others. There is a God and his judgement is the only one that matters. If you feel dirty and unclean, remember, God knows the truth and doesn't think you're dirty. Stay strong and live.

My heart goes out to all of you. You guys are brave for sharing your stories, and most of all, living. I know how hard it gets and you tend to beat yourself up over it or live in constant fear of the opposite sex.

If you forgive, you forget. It is not bad forget. It will make you stronger and an even stronger person to keep your head held up high. Stand up straight and display your proudness. You are you, and no one can take that away from you.

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Dec 14, 2007
Forgive and forget . . .
by: Darlene Barriere - webmaster

While I agree with you on the forgiveness aspect—I've written many articles and comments on that very topic—I vehemently disagree with your position on forgetting, Katrina. Because regardless of whether or not you forgive (forgiveness is not for the other person, the abuser; it's for you, the survivor), you will never forget. Perhaps what you are trying to say is that through forgiveness, a survivor will let go of the hate and anger and torment. If that is what you are trying to say, I do agree with you.

To my visitors: Exchange with an Abuser and My comments on Vanessa'a story Sept 20 "A cathersis" are two pages on my site that discuss the subject of forgiveness. Also, the June 2007 issue of Barriere Bits e-zine discussed the matter under "Ask Darlene." Subscribe today FREE in order to gain access to the back issues. Next issue is due in your inbox next Tuesday, December 18, 2007.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

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