When the Cycle of Child Abuse is NOT Broken

by Erika
(California, USA)

My older brother, four sisters and I were victims of physical, verbal, emotional abuse, and neglect. I am grateful that from the time I was 8-12 years old my grandmother took me to live with her. Under her loving care I learned that the way I used to live was not normal, it was not right...it is heartbreaking to see how my sisters now abuse their children.

My older sister's child shivers and is so afraid of my sister when she is angry. Worst of all, we have no contact with her or her family anymore. She has anger management problems and has been arrested for physically attacking another person. I have reported it to Child Protective Services, and I feel horrible knowing that she is my sister and a victim herself and knowing that she thinks there is nothing wrong with what she is doing. She thinks that because they are her children she can do whatever she wants to them...I feel guilty for what might happen to her, and if it will negatively affect her children. I keep thinking she does provide a home for them, clothes, and food. I just can't help but to think that children also need love, kind words, and more than anything to feel safe, to have a good uplifted self esteem.

I remember how I used to feel being called a "bitch", "an idiot", and "a worthless peace of trash", and with those words, the beatings and the heartache. I truly did believe those words when I was a child.

Child abuse is wrong! Yes, sometimes parents raise their voice and punish their children, but hitting, name-calling, or depriving them of a meal is not a punishment, its abuse!

If you've been a victim yourself accept it, accept that it's wrong and break the chain. Your children and the children of your children should not suffer for your parents', or your grandparents' mistakes.

Note from Darlene: I regret that I can no longer continue the practice of commenting on visitor submissions to the degree I have in the past, as I am currently writing a book on healing from child abuse. I ask that you please read my post of June 24, 2009 titled Announcement Regarding my Comments for a complete explanation. I welcome you to follow my progress on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I do hope to hear from you there.

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