Relationship Violence Story From Name Undisclosed

by Name Undisclosed
(Location Undisclosed)

I am now 18 and it happened 2 or 3 years ago. I started going out with this guy who was 2 years older than me. He'd buy me things and was very sweet and mature (at the time that's what i'd thought) . One day when we were going out on a date, he picked me up and told me that we had to stop at his house first because he had forgotten something that he wanted to give me. He asked me to wait in his room but I started to feel uncomfortable. I was alone with a guy in his house!! So I told him that I'd wait for him downstairs. About 2 minutes later he came down and out of no where hugged me from behind. I was alittle shocked. He gave me this necklace and asked me if i wanted him to help me put it on. I let him and as he finished, he started kissing my neck and wispered I love you. I know I should have felt happy but instead I felt uneasy and nervous. I started telling him that we should get going but instead he spun me around facing him with my back against the wall. He leaned in and started kissing me and touching me. I was shocked because I've never let him touched me this way before. His hand was up my shirt and the other pushing me against the wall. I tried to break free and told him to stop but he pulled me to the floor and continued kissing and touching me. Next thing i knew, he was trying to take off my clothes. He had taken his shirt off. I couldn't get up because he was on top of me! I told him to let me go and that i didnt want to do this but he seemed to not have been listening and continued. Next minute the door opened and his older brother walked in. I was half undressed and he was shirtless so natrally his brother thought that we were making out. He yelled at his brother and told him that we were having sex. I was speechless. The next thing his brother said was have you got protection? You could use some of mine if you want. (something like that)

I got up as fast as i could and headed for the door. I didn't know what i was supposed to do and i was so confused about what happened back there. He was so close to raping me or taking my virginity. I didnt talk to him after that, but he tried to call and text me saying he was sorry and that all he wanted to do was show me he loved me. He simply said "that's what guys do" and that girls were supposed to like it. I told him that I wasnt like other girls and that I "don't" like it! I told him that it was over and that he should go hook up with some girl that was willing to give it to him! That's when he said to me that he should have just done it then and there so that he could dump me after he'd got what he wanted because I was just some chick that wasn't his type anyway and all he had wanted was to get some. I haven't even told my bestfriends about this because sometimes I feel embarrass that I am still a virgin. All my friends had lost theirs. But I just wanna say that if your not ready, then you dont have to do it just because vereyone else is doing it.

I also want to warn everyone that people arent always what they seem and to becareful not to step too far off the edge and fall. Because as many people know, that it's hard getting back up. And to anyone that has fallen...keep trying to get back to the top cuz someday soon, things will go your way. Fight for what is right.

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coachNote from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.

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Comments for Relationship Violence Story From Name Undisclosed

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Aug 31, 2010
To Name Undisclosed:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

What you experienced is calling "relationship violence" or "dating violence". You were smart to get out of that situation and not go back. Writing you that text, saying he was sorry, etc., that was all part of the cycle of violence. He and his brother are bad news. I would report what happened, before another unsuspecting girl gets harmed. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coach.
Darlene Barriere
author. speaker. survivor. coach
Talk Before Touching® Series

Sep 01, 2010
right up front you talk and you first go in groups get to know one another
by: Anonymous


you are lucky for alot of reasons, that you thought it thru and figured out who you are first off in a normal situtation and then you also were lucky that his family he although he didnt do it, abided by no and his family at least had morals to stop it, no was recognized before it went too far for you even that too far

i guess i wonder your generation women or even men what it is where communication is broken down everyething is supposedly unspoken words we presume things based on here say or gestures or gifts and such too much presumeing, i think your generation two things solve this, right up front when you meet someone make your self clear , serous or not serious, or thinking maybe serious and if so the reasons and what that means before you even go on first date, and better get to know the person in group settings , you lucky the group was brother who yelled ect and stopped it, someone else there, thats my advise to young people that way the invisble boundries dont exist, you make it clear not one thing wrong with open communication dating and sex all that thats what i like to see both my sons and daughter do as they grow and find someone, there are no invisilbe boundries you got to say them talk and well maybe lose the guy or girl if you say truth tuff thats the way it goes, thats what i think is normal open communication in dating clear rules

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