Relationship Violence Story From Name Undisclosed2

by Name Undisclosed
(Location Undisclosed)

Had me wrapped around his finger: 
I was introduced to James on a family camping trip of my friend Emily's. He was her cousins best friend, and had been apart of her family forever. We hit it off right away, the whole weekend was filled with flirting and fun. After I left me and him stayed in contact for months. Always talking and texting. He was my exact opposite, yet we were similar at the same time. After a few months of communication he moved away to AZ for awhile. A few months later he surprised me by showing up at a shopping trip me and my friends went on (they had all planned it). He had moved back, and I thought it was going to be the best thing that ever happened to me.

The first month or so of us dating was great. We hung out all the time on weekends and it was fun. But he starting getting sexually physical with me right away. I didn't like it, but I always had a problem with telling people no. I usually just said nothing. I never felt like I had much of a say.

Around the second month of us dating, he started getting mean. He'd ignore me. No matter what my opinion was on something, it had to be wrong. He'd talk down to me, and constantly criticize me. Nothing I ever did was right. If I ever texted him he called it being "clingy", but if he texted/called me I should be grateful. If I ever stated my point of veiw, he would crush it and say it was stupid. No matter what we did it was always what he wanted to do. If i didnt have sex with him he would drop me off way earlier then I had to be. If i liked something, he trash talked it no matter what it was. He constantly made me feel like I couldnt do anything right. "I have you wrapped around my finger. I can make you do anything I want." He once told me over the phone. The one comment scared me so bad I wanted to run and hide. He knew ways to make me feel guilty about what I would or wouldn't do. Made me feel like s**t all the time. He had me feeling like I wasn't good enough, and to make him happy I'd have to sleep with him.

His constant attacks at who I am was starting to crush my feeling of self worth. I got in the state of mind of not being good enough. He was manipulating me, and played off my weakness's to his advantage.

One day I couldn't take it anymore. The empty feeling I always felt never went away. I was tired of feeling like s**t and finally broke it off.

Looking back on it, I saw the warning signs. Signs I clearly ignored. DON'T IGNORE YOUR GUT FEELING!

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coachNote from Darlene: I welcome you to follow me on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I hope to hear from you there!

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Comments for Relationship Violence Story From Name Undisclosed2

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Jan 25, 2010
SO glad you broke it off...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

You showed a great deal of self-esteem and courage by breaking up with him. You most definitely are more worthy than anything he was offering. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me. And you couldn't have left a better message.

Does Your Relationship make the Grade? by: Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From the Talk Before Touching™ Series
Does Your Relationship Make the Grade?

Jan 26, 2010
Always believe in yourself.
by: maurice

Good on you, your story gives great hope to us all Darlene certainly gave you great credit for all you wrote so cinfidently in your story. Full of SElf Esteem. Stay Brave, Stay Strong and persevere in building up your own self worth, Think positive, be positive, act positive each day you wakr from your pillow. Build up a good wholesome self miror image of yourself. Love that me in the mirror to bits. Hug real love of yourself into you.LOve and respect the wonderful and beautiful empowering woman. You know you are. Great you had the courage to walk away from such a idiot of a human being of the male species. control freak. by doing what you did I hope and know many women will be helped to go with their gut feelings too about Him. Your the best and you deserve the best. Go for it each day you wake up. I can, I will, I must because I am worth it. LIve well, laugh alot love much. Always believe in yourself. Have real and true friends in your life. Have a healthy mind in a healthy body. become active and alive in taking part in sportng and cultural disciplines with other likeminded people. There is natural learning and safety in numbers. They more we intergrate with others we all benefit from acknowledgeing the uniqueness and the giftedness in others thus seeing myself in the special and unique category. I'M SPECIAL, I LOVE ME. BECAUSE I TOO AM GIFTED IN MY OWN RIGHT. LOVE AND RESPECT YOUR OWN DIGNITY. YOUR OWN SELF WORTH IN THE MIRROR.

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