Relationship Violence Story From Jordan S

by Jordan S
(Ohio, USA)

When I first saw JC, I thought he was so cute and I would try to do anything to get his attention. Eventually, it worked and he started noticing me. At first, it was just flirting and then it led to him coming over to my house, meeting my family, and making out. A relationship didn't start between us until about a week after he came over to my house for the first time. The first few weeks were really good; he was good to me and respected my parents. And then out of nowhere, things started to change. There was some things that I would do with JC that got me in trouble. He gave me two hickies which got me into some serious trouble at home and church. One day he was taking me home from school but we stopped at his house to let his dog out. But we ended up staying for a half hour and before I knew it, I saw my mom's car in his driveway and she was not happy that I was there when his parents were not. I got grounded but she still allowed me to date JC even though I could tell she didn't think he was good for me. That was the turning point in our relationship because after that, JC became very possessive and obsessive with me for example he would get mad if I didn't call him back immediately, if I had any guy friends on my phone or Facebook, and he made me text him at school even tough we went to same school at the time and I got caught and was suspended. Even though he told me he was sorry and swore he would change, he didn't. It got so bad that my mom and step dad forbade me to go back out with him. At first I was upset and I cried my eyes out because I was "in love" with him, but then my step dad told me he loved me and he wanted what was best for me and that was when I started to believe them JC was not good for me and that I needed to break up with him. I broke up with JC that night and he went crazy. He was screaming and crying at me, begging me not to break up with me, but I refused to listen to his pleas. Shortly afterwards, JC moved back to his old school and I have not seen him since he left which was in January 2010. Even though JC never physically hurt, his words and his possessiveness got to me and broke me down to the point where I couldn't think clearly without him in my head. He didn't mess with my body, but he messed with my head.

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coachNote from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.

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Comments for Relationship Violence Story From Jordan S

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Nov 22, 2010
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Your parents were—ARE—very smart. They protected you and kept you safe from harm. I applaud and commend them for what they did for you. And your stepfather was so right. If they hadn't intervened, eventually JC would very likely have physically assaulted you. You see, the two of you were still in the first phase of the cycle of violence: the "tension phase", where emotional assault is happening. Isolation. Constant monitoring. Belittling. Etc. It was just a matter of time before the violence escalated. I'm delighted he is no longer in your life because you deserve so much better. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coach.
Darlene Barriere
author. speaker. survivor. coach
Talk Before Touching® Series

Nov 30, 2010
Listen and learn but for God's sake Listen
by: maurice

Jordan S: it was'nt easy for you but I am so glad your Parent's love for you was stronger than that of JC: It has always amazed me and still does that when teens/adolecents begin dating that they don't see each others weaknesses as well as strength's: JC sure had his unreal concept of dating just for him to be possevive so he could have control: Jordan S I am certain your story will help other teens/adolecents who find themselves in such a predicament to leave it immediately: I have seen many a frustrated parent wanting to give good wholesome advice to their Son/daughter when they know the so-called friend wanting to build a relationship: Knowing iof it continues there will be trouble: Darlene sure has given you loving, re-assuring words to build your positive thinking on when it comes to relationships: I am certain too you are intelliegent enough to know now JC and yourself would not have been a good relationship: Love and respect yourself enough so that you will ensure who ever you take to build a relationship with he will LOVE, Value and Respect you for who you are not for who he want you to be: ALWAYS BELIEVE IN YOURSELF: Have a healthy mind in a healthy body: By this I mean get out there and off your bottom taking part with your own age and gender in team sports: or sporting and cultural activities with like-minded people your own age: You will widen your horizons and you sure will have great and good friends all your life: You reminde me JordanS of a teacher when I was in primary school who used say to class every morning Listen and learn but for God's sake listen: I am delighted you listened to your parents: I am certain it will be a learning experience for you too: stay safe: be safe:

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