Making Excuses for Sexual Abuse Allows Sexual Abuse

by Rose
(Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, USA)

My 6- and 5-year-old granddaughters are placed with the father, who lives with the grandfather. The 6-year-old had revealed earlier that her father had been touching her down there. I received a picture of the grandfather holding her with his hand on her privates, bruises all over both of the girls and a recording of the 5-year-old telling her mother of bruises all over her, in addition to hearing her get smacked and her yelling ow. The 6-year-old told her therapist that she has nightmares because her grandfather makes her sleep with him. Also, she has had female infections for up to 5 months with no medical treatment. I also found out that the 6-year-old has to sleep with the grandfather and the 5-year-old has to sleep with the father.

I reported all of this to D.H.S. and C.P.S. only to hear excuses and to be told that they buy them everything under the sun, so this is not happening. Then I found out that they bought them skimpy bikinis. All of this and I'm told this does not mean they are sexually abused. Yet my granddaughters are continually begging me to come and get them.

D.H.S. and C.P.S. is allowing this abuse to continue, by making excuses and turning a deaf ear. I will not give up until they are in a safe environment.

Darlene's comments to this Child Abuse Article titled "Making Excuses for Sexual Abuse Allows Sexual Abuse" can be found at Comments below this submission. Depending on system activity, there are sometimes delays in comments going live on my site; but rest assured, they do eventually appear. So if you don't yet see them, I hope you will return later to read what I, and possibly others, have written. I thank you for your patience and understanding.

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Comments for Making Excuses for Sexual Abuse Allows Sexual Abuse

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Jun 23, 2008
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I agree with you, Rose. When we make excuses for sexual abuse, we enable it.

Stay vigilant to protect those precious little granddaughters of yours.

And Rose, you'll notice I did not post the lovely photo you included of you and your "little angels." Just so you know, I do not permit personal photos of children on my site, partly because I cannot verify who they are, but mostly because I have no way to stop someone with perverted motives to use photos of children on my site in twisted and illegal ways. I'm sure you understand.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Dec 14, 2008
Obviously Kids Don't Lie
by: Anonymous

Instead of assuming the absolute worst, next time you have your babies, take them on a trip to the doctor. Have a doc check them out to make sure things are fine.

Bruises don't necessarily mean abuse. I lived with my dad growing up and as a little girl, I wanted to fit in better, so I would wrestle or play football in the front yard. I would have fun, but get scrapes and bruises...It's called being a kid. Unless you lived in a bubble as a youngster, I'm sure you had some, too.

Take them to the doctor and make sure things are fine before jumping to conclusions.

Note from Darlene: Anonymous, I removed your offensive remark. While I don't disagree with your assessment, I suggest you check out my page Signs of Physical Abuse page to get a better idea yourself of what is considered "normal" vs "suspicious" bruising. I would appreciate if you would keep your tone more respectful on this site. Thank you for your understanding.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

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