Child Abuse Sex Offenders - Punishment Is Not The Answer

by William W
(Location Undisclosed)

Originally posted as a comment in another article thread: 
Is there a punishment that would serve justice unto victim more so when victim being an child.

There not any amount of punishments that would
remove dismiss crime committed // in truth the
hate and ill feeling the victim feels as being
felt by family members & friends of the victim
in a demand for justice but adding more sorrow.

Thus the intention as actions should be toward
a cure for the offender defeating desires /the
feelings bringing about such appalling acts of
sexual abuse // thus less focus on punishments.

Of course there are situations / where the abusers desire to abuse being so strong /that for such safety of children /a prison sentence is needed where /qualified as needed support being given to the offender in coming to terms with their illness // such being by far the better route.

Lets remember abuse of children be an illness, an
illness of mind that is in sore need of treatment
sexual abuse of children / an illness that's in need of understanding/ best possible treatment.

I do not say such in favour of the abuser but
to put in terms // that in seeking punishment
is not in truth constructive // to the abuser
or unto the victim // where seeking a cure be
far more productive //preventing future abuse.

If the victim is to be left with a lifetime in
feeling hate malice // its not the abuser they harm but themselves. / Resulting in an life of
misery /unable to leave a past experience that
brings remorse /regret /tears /sorrow / anger.

Its not a case of forgiving /but one accepting
a bad experience where coming to terms with it
that it not being allowed to destroy ones life
or lives of family members // as friends alike.

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coachNote from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.

I hope you'll follow me on:

Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in submissions and visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited. Please don't include them, as they will be removed.

Comments for Child Abuse Sex Offenders - Punishment Is Not The Answer

Click here to add your own comments

Apr 15, 2011
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this matter with my visitors and me. I do not, however, agree with your position, and this is why: there is no cure, and abusers need to face the consequences of their actions. The consequences must be to take them out of society so they can no longer harm another child. Having said this, I will also concede that the recidivism rate among offenders is very low; and I believe that's because when an offender is convicted, goes to prison, and then is released, there are more likely to be protocols in place to watch and keep track of the offender. That's not to say it's always the case. Nor is it to say that offenders never re-offend after they've been incarcerated. But studies repeatedly show that the vast majority of offenders who've been caught do not go on to re-offend. It's when they haven't been caught that they typically don't stop.

As for your position on forgiveness vs acceptance, I also disagree. Acceptance does not allow the hate and anger and hostility to release from the person, though it is a step. Forgiveness is highly misunderstood. I've said countless times already on this site, forgiveness is basically saying that I will no longer be imprisoned by the hate and anger and hostility. I agree with you that the anger eats away at the person who harbours it, leaving that person harming themselves. But it's through forgiveness that anger and hate and hostility releases from the person harbouring it. In other words, we don't let IT go; rather, It lets go of us through forgiveness. But until a person is ready to forgive, I respect the process that a person must first go through to get to that place. I believe acceptance is a step in that process, the step right before forgiveness.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

Apr 15, 2011
William W.- Punishment
by: GPM

Take this argument against your position on abuser punishment- if the child abuser can be rehabilitated by systems which have had to either deal with the child abuser as a criminal, or as a medical patient as you propose, then why have both systems determined child abusers have the worst results from any known rehab program or treatment, and have be labeled as some of the worst repeat offenders. The vast majority of these abusers of defenseless women and children have so far defied all known rehabilitation programs and certainly have no fear of be re-incarcerated.

Even when these social misfits are let back into society, the law enforcement agencies and courts system require them to be registered as sex offenders and the neighborhood communites they are located in to be notified of their presence. They are required not to be found anywhere near schools, parks, or functions where children are present. They are forbidden to be found near family shelters or facilites where other like offenders are housed.

Why you ask? Because they are almost impossible to rehabilitate. It will be a lot easier on society if social engineers like you William put your social ideas to practice where you have to deal with these animals personally. Then you might see that your bleeding heart is getting in the way of reason and reality. But since you are not involved in mending the victims, I doubt you will ever reach this conclusion. Todays morgues and cemetaries are full of women and children who are the byproduct of giving an abuser a SECOND CHANCE. So William W., revel in your wishful thinking, but we who want to do everything we can to protect women and children are going to ask for the abusers to be as severally punished as possible, and may God show them mercy because I won't.

Apr 18, 2011
Turning my Pain into Power for others: An Inspiration for Others
by: maurice

As one having been abused by a religious brother I am convinced He knew he was in a very powerful position being a member of the Church: The Powers to be appointed him to be at a time when there was no personal vetting of candidates for those who felt they had a vocation: No on questioned this man's background; I we boys knew part of his background the school he attended physically abused him by canings on his bare bottom: He was a man in his fifteis when I met him: In hid-sight now he was a pervert as well as a child-abuser: He held that position until he retired at almost 70 years: He had a full life abusing the boys under his care: I can safely say that they were 16 other male religious in that school: possibily only one or two did know how he deciplined us boys: Superiors were the strong people in those days and what they said went, what they accepted was OK: I can't say for certain if he knew we were beaten on the bare bottom by him: I know many religious like him: Many teachers: Coaches: Fathers/mothers of families where abuse took place: PUNISHMENT IS NOT THE ANSWER: I totally disagree with you in this theory of yours: I believe/know all those who abuse know what they are inflicting on the innocent child/adolecent: Control and devious freaks: Many of those who abused, I have no doubt were abused as chidren and adolecents themselves: Saw nothing wrong with it and therefore accepted it as being Normal for them to do it to their victims: The abused lives with the effects of such abuse be it mental, physical, sexual for years and are therefore doubly punished by their abuser: Darlene in her comment sure has the background knowledge and professional understanding and I agree 100% with her comment to you: Respectful and most understanding of where you are coming from in your opinion: It is difficult for me: I know forgiveness is most neccessary both for the abusre and the absued: Society even today cannot and does not provide place's of rehabilitation: councellors: Therapists: qualified people sufficeiently adequate to educate the abuser: He or She has done wrong by abusing the innocent: Prison or a place that takes such people away from being near children out of society for a time does as Darlene puts it help the the greater percent not to re-offend again: Sadly Society is not as forgiving even with knowing this: I can understand Parents particualarly mothers being afraid: I would be if I knew of an abusre living in my community: The use of the word punishment derives in my mind because I was punished: I suffered the effects of Punishment (physical) mental for years and I am still haunted by it: How many do you (know) who live in self denial even after a prison term: That is the big worry for me so many abusers won't admit they did an injustice to their innocent, vunerable, victim: There must be some form of Re-Habilitation in isolation for those who abuse: I don't see it as being an eye for an eye: Just honest to goodness help:

May 05, 2011
but what if they don't want to change.
by: BMW Princess

Many child molesters don't want to change.
You might be able to help the ones who do but what about the ones who don't? If someone dosn't want to change they can't be helped. it's like give up smoking or fast food. If you like it you will not stop. Even though it's bad.
You have to want to change

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Child Abuse Article - Write one.

Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.

Most Recent

  1. Feel Extreme Guilt

    Apr 25, 17 08:19 AM

    I had been repressing the guilt of playing sexual games and forcing my cousin brother to tongue kissing with me. I am 24 now but keep remembering the same

    Read More

  2. Not To Blame

    Apr 18, 17 11:04 AM

    I was in my 10th standard and like every girl, I was very conscious of the weight problem. I used to go to my Music tuitions in the evening, and once I

    Read More

  3. Bad Dreams Surfacing

    Apr 13, 17 10:32 AM

    I am having a dream about my abusive stepfather where he wants my brother and me to change his soiled diaper. He started abusing me at the age of three

    Read More

Take the quiz

Fill out my online form.
HTML Forms powered by Wufoo.
E-book: Victim To Victory

From Victim to Victory
a memoir

How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life