Child Abuse Ignored

by Ed
(British Columbia, Canada)

I am a father of two young boys - i live everyday with regret and anger - their mother was abused from age 6 to 14 by a stepfather - she revealed this to me several years ago - and i have watched her life go down ever since.

We went to the police and nothing materialized - She is no longer in our lives and i have watched her become a drug addict and thief - to the point of arrest - i am at my wits end and the guilt is slowly killing me inside. I live in fear that i havent done enough.

I have attacked the indivdual online - Facebook - i have contacted police - but have been told - she has to report it.

I am worried that i havent done enough - i cant sleep and am having difficulties with everyday life - Why do i feel this - i didnt do anything wrong - but i havent done anything right either. Where can i get help - for her - for me and for my children.

Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in submissions and visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited. Please don't include them, as they will be removed.

Comments for Child Abuse Ignored

Click here to add your own comments

Jan 11, 2010
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

You are a loving and caring father and husband. I understand your concern, especially with regard to your children and how they cannot have a good relationship with their mother because of the destructive way she is coping with historical child abuse. Sadly, the authorities are right. There is nothing you can do because your wife is an adult, and therefore has the right to do or not do anything about what happened to her as a child. It would be different if she were still a child. I wish I could be more helpful. But the best you can do is to be a soft place for your children, and never degrade their mother (not that you have). Thank you for sharing yours and your wife's story with my visitors and me. I wish you, your children and your wife all the best.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

Jan 12, 2010
YOU are a GOOD MAN. YOU are a good FATHER
by: maurice

Oh my heart goes out to you and your two children. Your doing your very best to amke a sense of the effects abuse is having on your lovely and good wife and mother. Darlene is the one to heed in her comments to you. She truly feels your difficulties od thrying to understand your wife, (adult) Love will be the winner she will realise hopefully sooner than later you love her, you care about her, for the sake of your two boys. She will hopefully realize she owes it to her beautiful children to seek and get help with you helping he. Thank you for sharing your feelings with Darlene and her visitors. There is help out there, don't give up, don't quit believeing in yoursefl and in your good wife too still living with the effects of what that B of a step-father did to her. Be striong, stay strong for yourself and your BOYS. Talk to a counsellor yourself telling your feelings. You need to love yourself too.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Child Abuse Commentary.

Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.

Most Recent

  1. Feel Extreme Guilt

    Apr 25, 17 08:19 AM

    I had been repressing the guilt of playing sexual games and forcing my cousin brother to tongue kissing with me. I am 24 now but keep remembering the same

    Read More

  2. Not To Blame

    Apr 18, 17 11:04 AM

    I was in my 10th standard and like every girl, I was very conscious of the weight problem. I used to go to my Music tuitions in the evening, and once I

    Read More

  3. Bad Dreams Surfacing

    Apr 13, 17 10:32 AM

    I am having a dream about my abusive stepfather where he wants my brother and me to change his soiled diaper. He started abusing me at the age of three

    Read More

Take the quiz

Fill out my online form.
HTML Forms powered by Wufoo.
E-book: Victim To Victory

From Victim to Victory
a memoir

How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life