A False Perception

by Arthur J
(Brooklyn NY, USA)

I was severely abused growing up. I had my nose nostril ripped in half, I was pushed down a flight of stairs, had a bag of black licorice jammed down my throat making me permanently sick of the candy. That's only what I don't remember, I learned of them later in life. What I do remember is, being constantly beaten, repeatedly knocked unconscious, starved, isolated, and verbally assaulted every day.

I had a good start to life, but when I was 4 1/2 years old, my mother brought in my soon-to-be stepfather who proceeded to beat the living crap out of me.

What drove me crazy though was not the abuse, but the denial of it afterward. That it was all in my mind and it never happened. That my stepfather was a good guy and I was the bad one. It drove me crazy until I saw the same abuse as mine all around the world and in the corporate world and government.

I learned that society taught my family to ignore my abuse and all the facts and logic I could produce. This worldly denial was everywhere and what compelled me to write my book. The easiest way to change oneself or a society, is to change our perception. The way I healed myself was to openly look at my past. The easiest way to change a society, is to openly look at our past.

Don't be afraid of a new perception, it can help make lasting positive changes.

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Comments for A False Perception

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Mar 29, 2016
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Perception or perspective really is everything. How we see what happened to us can be the difference between a life of misery or one of mastery. But as I see it, it can never be at the expense of denial of our feelings and emotions. Not to wallow in those feelings and emotions, but instead, to allow our Selves to experience them fully first. When we do, they release us from the prison they hold us in. And with that release, it is much easier to embrace a new perception or perspective.

Thank you for sharing your story and philosophy with my visitors and me. I send you love, light and continued healing energy, Arthur.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

Mar 31, 2016
A False Perception
by: Carol

Hi Arthur, you are right on all accounts.
I understand the denial and feeling crazy when they say it didn't happen, it's supposedly our fault, somehow we asked for it and a host of other rationalizations.

They didn't count on us coming back with the truth. We're stronger than they are. They are cowards.
Best wishes on your book. :) I've also started writing my experiences again in hopes of creating something cohesive enough to become a book some day.
Regards, Carol

Apr 28, 2016
Proposing how to discourage parents from child abuse
by: Felix A

I am currently taking an English class at Community college of Aurora where I wrote a research paper titled "Parents that Chastise their Children should be Fined and not face Imprisonment". Child abuse originates from a commonly accepted norm, spanking. Parents initially spank their children to promote good behavior, but it tends to harm the child in the long run, especially if it is practiced frequently. The strange fact is that in most states in the United States, spanking is not counted as child abuse except if there are evidence of physical marks on the child, even though there is evidence that that spanking rapidly leads to child abuse. My paper proposed that parents who spank their kids should be fined when evidence of physical violence is obvious, as separating children from their parents also has negative impacts, such as poor mental health and delinquent/criminal behavior, aggressive behavior, and anti-social behavior/anxieties. There is substantial evidence from research that people tend to comply with laws and regulations only when they are aware of how they will be penalized. Thus, parents will shift away from spanking as a way of promoting good behavior from their children when there are laws that penalize them with fines. Moreover since spanking is mostly associated with low-income families, this will also motivate the assailants to avoid physical violence on their victim, as they would not be able to accord the imposed fines.

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