Relationship Violence Story From Name Undisclosed

by Name Undisclosed
(Fort Lauderdale, Florida, USA)

Emotionally Lost: 
Where do u go frm here the deginning of 2003 I met someone named c I was just getting out of a relationship and I felt he was a great person when we met it was on a chat line we fell in love instantly he was 16 and i was 17 he lived in miami and i in ft.lauderdale when i turned 18 we moved together and thats when the real person came out of him he didnt hit me all the time but it was enough to make my heart and mind fill like why me what did i do at night when i wouldnt have sex with him he would pour water on me and kept doing it till i did what he wanted i would gt slaped if i said the wrong things when he get mad he call me names like whore stupid ugly im not the best girl or he could have someon better than me it hirt so bad i just didnt say anything when we were together out everything seem fine and he was so sweet and he wasnt always like this i couldnt tell anyone or friends and family cause friends would say im stupid but i was really in love and old saying frm family you like i love it so i delt with it within myself 2006 i had a baby girl to be honest hes a great father an takes care her well but he have hit me in frint of her and called me names im a shitty mother and he hit m whie i was pregant i fill like theres no way out i lov hime and think noone else will love me i try so hard not to say and do anything wrong but im always stupid or dum or or ugly i love his amily and im still trying to work this out but emotionaly my heart hurts and hitting me i want to hurt him its not good for my daugter and its a patter my mom was abused when i was young its not ok never think it is whether physical or emoitional i just need help to know where to trun just recently he hit me in front of our child i always throught maybe cause we lost our other daugter in 09 she was thre months i think its cause of me where do i go and do when your heart love so hard and your heart is so weak.