Relationship Violence Story From Icy Heart

by Name Undisclosed

Julian was my first boyfriend...long distance boyfriend. I have had plenty before...but none like him.

I met him at my dad's wedding and we hit it off. I walked down the beach with terribly cliché. And he would tell me all these wonderful things. Like, "If I could, I'd write your name in the sky." We kept in touch by phone and computer. My mother didn't approve right away, but when she saw my change in attitude, she thought he was the best thing to come into my life.

Julian was very...jealous of all of my guy friends. He was jealous that I hung out with them and couldn't go to Washington to see him. I thought that it was just natural, so I shrugged it off.

When my 16th birthday rolled around and he was 18, he asked me to send him some nude pictures. I told him no and that he didn't respect me if he couldn't listen to my reasoning. That tipped him off.

Pretending like nothing was wrong, he said okay and didn't bring it up until a couple months later. We had been talking about marriage and kids. Then he got into sex. I didn't understand...I wasn't ready. I didn't know why he was talking about it. I told my mom and she told him to quit. He did...for about six months.

When I was talking to him one time, he wanted to do sexting. I told him no and he called me horrible names. He shot down my reasoning like he was boss. When my parents secretively read my texts, they told me to break up with him. I didn't want to.

I was in love with him and I didn't understand why. How can you be in love with someone who hurt you over the course of almost two years?

I finally broke it off. I looked up teen dating violence and recognized the feelings of what I was having for him.

Don't get caught up in relationships that will kill your heart.

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coachNote from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.

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From Victim to Victory
a memoir

How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life


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