Comments for Child Abuse Story From Suez

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Nov 22, 2009
 A professional is in a better position to help you...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Suez, I don't know of any resources available to you in your country, but I believe you need help in order to deal with whatever happened to you, and also to deal with any compulsive behaviour you have. What you call "accidents" are not accidents when they have been purposely done to you; perhaps you intended the word "incidents". Regardless of the reasons for your compulsions, you must own up to them, especially the alcoholism. You chose alcohol as your drug of choice, now you must accept that you chose it in order to heal from it. The sexual compulsion is something you need professional help with. No one who visits here can help you with that. I can only give you space to write your story, and then offer encouragement. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Nov 23, 2009
 Incidents in our childhood seem always natural and happen in simple ways.
by: maurice

Suez, well done for searching for a place you can receive support and advice. You sure found the best in Darlene, Read her comment carefully, over and over again until it makes sense to you. I too was subjected to innocent incidents as a child at home and in my boarding school. Up to the age of 33 I had difficult days making a sense of them. I felt for along time I was Gay because of what the Older Boys did to me as a 12/13 year old every so often in secret and behind closed doors locker room and toilet. I had a number of girl relationships in my teens but I was always questioning myself. I am hetrosexual out and out but the thought of being Gay makes me feel I am bi-sexual at times. so even though as Darlene said incidents do happen when we are children I am the only one who has to get help. Heavy Drinking does not help. being an Alcoholic does not help eithr. we need professional help to answer such questions as yours. Heed Darlene's loving words to you Suez.
Nov 24, 2009
 Its not always necessary:
by: Monisha

I am a sexually abuse victim too. I was abused when I was around 8 or 9. I started realizing what happened when I was 13 or 14. It was hard, very very hard to deal with all of them. I was jus a weirdo at school. I never told anybody and had a lot of problems. I became totally inexpressive to an extent that I cannot even shout when I get hurt. I just keep quiet looking at the bruise and bleeding hurt. I am now 20 and I have dealt with all the memories with great courage without any professional help. I am not telling that I am totally over it. Even people who took help are not sure. Its first YOU who should start this healing. If you have the zeal to overcome all the memories and move on and be happy then you do not need any help, may be for addiction you might need help. Just dont force yourself to forget everything, by thinking its an accident or an incident and your just trying to make fuss. Its an insult to your inner child and the turmoil you faced after those incidents. Just face them all head on and be relieved. By escaping from them you will never be able to move on. Its just faking yourself that you are happy. I was so into pain that and got into drugs. Thank goodness I have a supporting family. No one knows what happened. Its just like a war and someday you will win if you just keep fighting. May be I am not totally over it but I am just ready for anything. I promise this journey to face all the memories and getting over your drug addiction will give you a lot of courage and light in your life,a sort of readiness to anything.I can clearly state myself as an example. I think everyone is right about getting professional help for alcohol addiction. Getting away from addiction surely needs a lot of help and involves a lot of mental strength but leaves you with a happy and peaceful life. For your trauma its just your choice. If you think YOU CAN deal with it YOU WILL, with or without help. All the Best.

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