Comments for Child Abuse Story From Sapphire

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Oct 12, 2008
SO glad you're in counselling...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Sapphire, I do hope you'll tell your counsellor what happened to you at the hands of that child molester. And just so you know, he lied to you. It WASN'T your fault. It will NEVER be your fault, no matter what. He was the grown up, and he used your youth and vulnerability to get what he wanted. What he did to you is called "grooming", where he got you to like him and trust him and even care deeply about him. He showered you with gifts to make you feel indebted to him. You see, Sapphire, he knew exactly what would work. It's quite likely he has done this to other girls, probably before and after he did what he did to you.

As for CPS investigating on the basis of that lady's call (I applaud her for making that necessary call!)...the way the system works—when it works the way it's supposed to, that is—is that when someone calls to register a complaint about suspected child abuse, CPS goes into an interview not knowing if the child IS or WAS being abused; and if the child IS being abused, who the offender actually is. In the vast majority of cases, it is one of the parents or guardians, so CPS must take care not to hinder the investigation. They do this by making sure to exclude the parents (a necessary evil) during an interview with the child or youth. So you see, Sapphire, it wasn't that they believed your father was abusing you; it was more about ensuring a proper interview and investigation was conducted. But they can only work with what the child is telling them.

I'm so glad that you've written out your story; thank you for posting here on my website for my visitors and me. As I said above, I sincerely hope you will share it with your counsellor. She can only help you when she knows what happened to you. And you so deserve to get help for this. Your self-harming and eating disorders are most likely tied into what that sex offender did to you. But you CAN overcome the effects of this, Sapphire. And just for the record, at this point all the "details" of what happened are less important than disclosing the fact that you were sexually abused. What you wrote was perfect. The rest will come in due course. Just stick with the counselling.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Oct 20, 2008
Good job
by: Julie

I agree 110% with Darlene. You are so very strong for sharing your story, even if you are not ready to tell all of it. The fact that you can share even part of it is amazing. I hope with all of my heart that you do not let this decide who you are. I hope that you will learn from this and become a stronger and better person. And I'm very glad that you are getting help

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stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



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