Comments for Child Abuse Story From Nikki

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Feb 12, 2008
The blame is NOT for you to carry...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Nikki, please read some of the sexual abuse victim and offender information pages on this site. I've listed them below for easy reference.

You really need to understand that your father's behaviour was so very typical of sex offenders. Sex offenders bribe their young victims because they know their vulnerabilities. They know what's important to a child or an adolescent, and they use that knowledge to get what they want. They use manipulation. I can't imagine how difficult it would have been to fight off his perverted advances day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year. Any ADULT would be worn down, never mind you as a child!

You referred to your father's advances as his "obsession with your body." He was a child molester, Nikki. It wasn't about YOUR body, or YOUR choices; you had no ownership in what he did to you. He got sexual gratification from the idea of having sex with a child, and not just ANY child; HIS DAUGHTER, FOR GOD SAKE! That makes him sick and twisted.

Yes, there is a lesson for OTHERS to learn in what happened to you: Tell someone. But you can't for one more second continue to blame yourself for NOT telling. Children and youth do not tell for a variety of reasons. Again, read the information pages on this site listed below to understand more. None of this was your fault, Nikki, none of it. The blame lies squarely on the shoulders of your child molesting father. You DID NOT let yourself down. You were a child; he was the adult. You CANNOT apply adult values to your adolescent decisions.

Nikki, at 15, your brain wasn't done developing. At 15, your brain hadn't yet matured enough to truly understand the consequences of your choices, choices that you CANNOT hold yourself accountable for, choices that your FATHER must be held accountable for. So please, don't for even a fraction of another second hold yourself responsible for acts committed against you.

I hope you'll read through the material on the following URLs on this site, Nikki. Then, I hope you will consider entering into some form of counselling to help you deal with the guilt and shame you carry, guilt and shame that you DO NOT and NEVER WILL have a claim to.

Sexual-abuse-victims

Female victims of sexual abuse

Sex offenders

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Feb 12, 2008
Hi, I'm Francine and I'm so sorry for you
by: Francine

OMG Your dad is a pervert!!!! He was the adult and you were the child!!!!!! I'm so sorry!!!!!!

Feb 25, 2008
Tips
by: Anonymous

Go and tell someone...like the cops or tell your mom!!

Mar 01, 2008
REPORT THE CHILD MOLESTER !
by: LINDA

Nikki, I cried tears of sadness for you. Your father is obviously obsessed with children, if it wasn't you, it would be someone else. He needs to be reported to th right people,to get some help. he has a very serious problem, which is not your fault. Fathers are suppose to protect their daughters from sex offenders. You can change your situation, just by telling someone. Be brave. I support you.

Feb 08, 2009
whoa
by: feelingSympathy

i feel very sorry for you.....

Oct 03, 2012
It happened to me too. . .
by: Anonymous

I am 30yrs old and planning for my wedding, I did not want my father to be part of it. We never had sex, but he used to fondle me and give me blow jobs, and I was taught how to receiprocate... He is a well respected government official. I finally told my mom yesterday why I did not want him to be part of the wedding and she simply ignored me. She can't believe the love of her life is capable of such...

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