Comments for Child Abuse Story From Name Undisclosed93

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Apr 23, 2011
To Name Undisclosed:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

The most important thing now is to be there in every capacity you can be for your daughter. When you learned what happened, you acted in a way that protected her from further harm, and you continue to do so; focus on that, not on the negative. In other words, you've done everything except let your daughter down. Beating yourself up about what happened is not going to help either of you or the situation. When you accepted that bringing your nephew into your home opened the door, it did not mean that you were responsible for the abuse he inflicted on your daughter. There's a huge difference between accepting responsibility for your role in the way things played out, and who was actually responsible for the abuse. I applaud that you are both going into some form of counselling in order to help you deal with what happened here, and what happened to you as a child. It's important for you to deal with the latter, otherwise your daughter will pick up on what's happening in your emotional world and blame herself. This is innate in children. So do what you must to get yourself some help as well as for your daughter. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir


Apr 23, 2011
Undisclosed93
by: GPM

You did not let your daughter down. You can not stop a wrong if you do not know it is being committed- in this case you caught the relative in the act before he could do further harm. The fact you exposed others that were harmimg you, and they received punishment for it speaks volumes about how you deal with the wrongness of abuse. You haven't let anyone down.

Seeking help to deal with any residual feelings of any guilt you may have as a result of believing you failed is the right direction to take. Including your daughter is fantastic. She may be a lot tougher than you think, and will do well in sorting all this out. What you're doing for the two of you is certainly not failure on your part.

One Texan to another- you just do the right thing when it's the right thing to do. You're a one-in-a-million hero as far as I'm concerned. GPM

Apr 24, 2011
a mother's heart: A mother's prayer: you'll be a great MoM
by: maurice

I believe in you: You'll be one great mother to your child: She will be safe, she will be protected, she wil be loved and cherished: Always believe in yourself: Abused as a child as you were which was nevr of your doing, I am not to blame: I did not want those people to hurt me, I did not have anyone to care about me but I know abusing a child in their innocence and in their vunerability is totally wrong: My daughter will be safe: Darlene has given you loving, caring words of affirmation, please oh please accept them, trust your motherly natural instincts andyou'll be fine: So will your Daughter: Hi, think about counselling for yourself so when all that happened you in abuse is put in perspective for you: You will hug, cuddle, love, cheirsh your own beautiful child: Darlene, herself has proved one can live a full life after abuse and turn the pain into empowering oneself to safeguard other beautiful and innocent children: The Lord bless you and keep you: The Lord show his face to you and keep you in the palm of his hand to protect you and your child: So Be IT:

Apr 26, 2011
no let down
by: Susie

You have not let anyone down! That's one of the saddest parts about abuse is we somehow always manage to feel shame and/or guilt when logically we know it wasn't our fault. One of the first things you may learn in counseling is that the outcome of your actions does not define who you are. Your intention was what mattered. You did not intend to hurt or let anyone down. You were trying to help a family member; and were betrayed in the process. I know exactly how that feels! It's definitely not your fault! Don't let the negatives get you down or change the kind and caring person you obviously are. You are doing the right things. Continue to believe in yourself and trust God to lead you in the right direction. Because of your caring and your suffering, you are making huge steps in improving your own life and the lives of your offspring for generations to come! Never feel that you are alone because you certainly are not. There are millions of people in the world who feel the way we do. Unfortunately, it still isn't as openly talked about as it should be. Know that you can always have me or others here to talk to. Keep being your beautiful self for you and your daughter!

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