Comments for Child Abuse Story From Name Undisclosed8

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Oct 16, 2008
No "small childhood" here!
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Just for the record, none of what happened to you was your fault. NONE OF IT! I did bristle when you used the word "slut" to describe yourself as a little girl. Not a word I would ever use for children; heck, I don't even use it for adults. It is terribly degrading. And from my perspective, you are not to be degraded, even in reflection. You've taken the lessons learned from your childhood and are applying them to raising your daughter; that makes you stronger and more amazing than you realize. You have much to be proud of. You are a better mother after having lived the life you did. That says a lot about you. Things could have been so different.

While counselling didn't work out for you, it could be that you didn't have the right counsellor. Not all of them are a good match. If you are a regular visitor to this site, you may have already read some of the comments I've given to other story contributors. In many cases, I recommend a book by Byron Katie titled Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life. Her approach to questioning your stressful thoughts could help you immensely. Whether or not you decide to pick up the book and try her approach, I do thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me. All the best to you and your family.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Oct 30, 2008
The thing I missed...
by: Undisclosed8

I wanted to add, that the thing I missed most about growing up the way I did was never getting to have that time when I was a teenager when I would get to choose someone to loose my virginity with. I knew what was coming and it never felt consensual, I was choosing it to happen (sex) but I never felt in control and I could never enjoy it.

I am glad that I now have a great partner whom I have a healthy sex life with but I still yearn for the missed opportunity to have sex on my own terms.

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stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
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