Comments for Child Abuse Story From Michelle3

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Jun 12, 2009
 Re-building relationships...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Michelle, I am glad that you are attempting to re-build a relationship with your father. Perhaps the two of you can openly discuss what has happened in your life as a result of LaDonna's interference. Time will tell. And don't think about whether or not you'll ever visit your father again. Take it one step at a time. You and he have much to repair in the relationship.

I really and truly believe you need counselling for the effects of growing up as you have: with manipulation and control from someone seemingly bent on destroying you in the eyes of your father. Obviously your father had an ear for LaDonna since he chose to believe everything she said about you. What made it so much worse, and ultimately gave LaDonna so much power, was when the medical profession allowed her to continue with her manipulation rather than give you a voice. This reinforced what she was doing, and it left your father unquestioning. You were helpless and powerless. The feelings of abandonment and betrayal must have been overwhelming. I'm very glad you had your mother and uncle to eventually fall back on.

Michelle, what we tell ourselves is more important than what others tell us about ourselves, especially as adults. You know in your heart when you are lying, just as you know when you are not. To call yourself a "liar" just because you've been called one all your life is to take the torch from the people who mistreated you and then to keep mistreating yourself. The insanity is when we tell ourselves something over and over again that simply isn't true. It's what you're thinking that needs to change, Michelle. That voice in the back of your head needs to be told: "I am NOT a liar. I AM truthful. I am lovable. I am special. I am worthy." This will help to re-build the relationship with yourself.

If you're not still in some type of counselling, Michelle, please consider seeking it out. You didn't deserve to be mistreated. You DO deserve to talk to someone about the fact that you were and the repercussions of that mistreatment.

Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

P.S. You'll note I edited your story, Michelle. I meant no disrespect having done so; it simply did not fit into the template I use for such contributions. However, I was very careful not to affect the integrity of your story. I thank you for your understanding.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
Jun 13, 2009
 New Beginnings are so important for each one of us.
by: maurice

I read and re-read your story Michelle 3. I was so taken by all that you shared in such detail that it made all you went through and that your step mother put you through. She was very naughty, very controlling, very nasty, very manipulating agains you Michelle 3. Your Father using his belt on you for what she you for was never your fault. Sadly one becomes somewhat deceptive to avoid such beatings, do strange things to get noticed, You will be fine Michelle. Oh if you can write with such conviction you can surely understand Darlen's wonderful words of help for you to think about. Be brave, Be strong for yourself now. You are the most important person NOW in your life. Your 18/19 with loads of sense and intellgence, that will stand to you NOW. New Beginnings, you must put in place for you to begin your road back to full health and a greater LOVE of the beautiful person you are NOW
Begin to live each day to the full taking small steps to say I can, I will, I must do things for me NOW. Think positive thoughts about yourself, act in a positive way for that to happen and be positive in carrying it out. Look in that Mirror, who do you see in there.? say nice things to and about yourself, I am beautiful no matter what happened me in my childhood years. Oh I feel the effects of those years but I am now with darlen's words of love to me to begin making sense pf them and Me. Always believe in yourself Michelle 3.
Jun 16, 2009
 Do not......
by: Judy

Hello Michelle3 -

Do not be held victim to your past. Your past does not define who your are today.
Do not associate yourself with those that are undeserving of your love,kindness, honesty.
Do not try to understand the actions of others.
Do not believe that you are a liar.
Do not continue to let your past destroy you.
Do not withdraw from everyone - there are loving, trusting, caring people in this world.
Do let go and let God work in your life.
Do love, cherish, and care for yourself.
Do believe that everything happens for a reason - and sometimes we don't understand what that reason is but believe it.
Do have Faith - there is no way to survive without.
Do know that we all care about you and are wishing you the best today and every day for the rest of your life. Judy
Jun 16, 2009
 Don't Quit . if you feel you have reached the lowest ebb the only way to go now is up.
by: maurice

Michelle 3, judy is truly loving of you and your welbeing. she has given you great positives to begin to work with to beginning believing in your true and beautiful self. Stop blaming yourself. get the help that Darlene suggested you needed. Say I am now my own true special independent self. I can let go of the bad memories of my abuse I can accomplish anything I want. I hope you have one /two friends who will walk with you, hug you to make you feel loved. Your friends are there for you please be kind to yourself and let them help you. Michelle Judy's says we all lve you and want the very best for you now. Go for it and you'll be fine.

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