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Mar 19, 2012
Martin:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Many years ago, I wrote such a letter to one of my abusers. It wasn't nearly as tame or sanitized as what you've posted here. I completely let loose all my feelings in that letter. I'm not suggesting you do that here, only that perhaps there is more for you to write. In my case, I wrote ALL that came to my mind. I didn't worry about language or who would read it. I just wanted to get it out there. As I progress through the rant—and it was a rant, a much needed rant; a purging, really—the pad of paper looked as though I had ripped at it with something sharp, that's how much force I eventually put on that poor pen. I realized that being timid about what I felt would do me no good in that moment. I also knew I would never send the letter; that wasn't why I wrote it. But I wouldn't let my Self stop writing until all that I felt was put on those shredded pieces of paper. ALL OF IT! And then when I was sure I had purged my Self of all I felt, really and truly purged EVERYTHING...I found a book of matches and ceremoniously lit those shredded pieces of paper ablaze, then chucked the burning mass into a metal trash bin, and then watched it dissolve into symbolic ashes. What a cleansing experience that was for me. I knew that sending it to my abuser would do nothing to change what had happened or change how my abuser would respond. This wasn't about my abuser; it was about ME. So sending it off was unnecessary for me. Perhaps you want to consider doing something similar. Add a chant or a prepared poem while the pages are ceremoniously being destroyed, if you like. And then take really good care of your Self. I send you love, light and healing energy, Martin. Healing from your past and from your hospital visit. Thank you for sharing your story and letter with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir


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