Comments for Child Abuse Story From Maria2

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Jul 04, 2009
 Understandable feelings...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Maria, I can understand how you're feeling. I've been there myself a very long time ago. I too thought I wanted to die, but what I really wanted was to be out of pain. I believe that's what you want too. And I don't think you really want your mother to die. I think what you really wish for is that your mother stops hurting you. And you have the right to not be hit or strangled or called terrible names. You are NOT ugly; you are beautiful. You are NOT stupid; you are smart and articulate and you have the potential to be and do anything you want to be and do. Don't ever lose sight of that. Don't ever let what someone else does to you affect your dreams. You mother is out of control. She is not thinking right. Mother's who are thinking right do not harm their children. She has allowed her own problems interfere with what's best for you and your sister. She needs help for her problems, help that you cannot provide her. But you need help just as much. I urge you to contact Child Help at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) in order to talk to someone about the abuse you are dealing with at home. They are staffed 24/7 with professionally trained counsellors who will listen to you. They are not a reporting agency, although they can help you through the process of reporting if you decide to disclose the abuse. You can visit their website by copying & pasting the following URL into your browser: http://www.childhelp.org/get_help Just remember, Maria, whatever is going on with your mother, it's her problem; it's not your fault. You don't deserve to be mistreated. You do deserve help for the fact that you are mistreated. Call the people at Child Help.

Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
Jul 04, 2009
 mothers need to be told they need help with their problems.
by: maurice

Maria 2, you are one very special and beautiful child sadly of a mother who does not accept you as that. Therefore you must always believe you are. at 12 years of age you know exactly what I'm saying to you. Maria 2 Darlene's comment is so loving of you and your sister. As she says she was where you are at now with your mother herself many years ago, I had better be respectful and say a number of years ago. Her story with her mother is almost identical as you with your mother. Read her comment and I am certain you will find real help and comfort from it. Your mother is a bully, hitting you and pulling your hair kicking you in your tummy and your very sensitive parts. She is acting like an overgrown teenager who happens to be a mother after birthing two beautiful children. Making you feel small even comparing you to your father is not adult behaviour. Darlene is right, she needs loads of help herself. Sadly you have to live with your feelings about her, one day a friend the next you hate her for hitting and treating you as a nobody/ stupid and lazy. My heart goes out to you because you are a very good child doing your very best to please her and help her around the house. Get help Maria 2. by telling people who care about you, love you, allow your friends to help you by taking you away out of the house from time to time. Give her less and less time to treat you the way she does. if she continues don't be afraid to warn her that she is abusing you. That you will let the relevant people know. Always believe in yourself you are very intelligent, you are aware your mother is not right in her caring of you. It is a difficult situation for you Maria 2 but be strong for yourself and your sister.
Jul 04, 2009
 To Maria and Maurice:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Maria, while I understand what Maurice is saying about don't be afraid to tell your mother she is abusing you and that you'll tell someone, I fear that with your mother's temper, you would put yourself a greater risk if you were to do such a thing. Maurice, I mean no disrespect at all, but I do disagree with you on this point. Allow me to share why:

As a younger child, I once told my mother that what she was doing to us was "wrong" and that she was "hurting us". I was told, "If you think I hurt you before, just wait." She got my father's belt and she beat me worse than ever before for "mouthing off" and "lacking respect" as she called it. She felt completely justified in leaving long-lasting welts all over my body as punishment. I learned that it wasn't safe to say such things to my mother.

So, Maria, if you do decide to disclose abuse, I would do so in a safe way; perhaps at school or at a friend's house. I personally wouldn't recommend confronting your mother by telling her that you'll report her if she doesn't stop mistreating you.

But I completely agree with Maurice on the rest of his loving and caring words of encouragement to you.

Again, Maurice, I thank you for all that you do with your heartfelt comments to visitors like Maria.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
Jul 04, 2009
 Your mother
by: Anonymous

Maria, your mother is wrong. You are not stupid; you are not ugly; my God, Maria, YOU ARE NOT AN IDIOT. You are smart, beautiful, articulate and worthy of love, dignity and respect, all of which you were so cruelly denied of. What your mother did to you is truly sadistic. I'm so sorry that you never had a good mom. The sooner you tell someone about it, sweetheart, the better. Darlene and Maurice are right, Maria! Please tell someone, like I just said, before it's too late. Don't wait too long!
Jul 05, 2009
 Thank you Darlene, I value your love and understanding
by: maurice

Yes, re-reading my comment on what you rightly make a valid point about Darlene, I meant well, but it could be mis-interpreted. I was asking Maria 2 to warn her mother off thinking she was beyond the age of letting herself be abused by her mother. Thank you for re-assuring her that might not be the best thing to do. Thank you for using your own sad experience of telling or saying to you mother you should not be beaten. You re-awaken my own standing up to my abuser when I felt I too was beyond the age being beaten on the my bare bottom at 15, he just beat me twice as hard. Maria 2 forgive me. read and heed Darlene's loving words to us both. She truly is a great caring human being (woman) Thank you Darlene.
Jul 05, 2009
 Yes I agree with Darlene
by: Scott Canada

I agree with you Darlene. Some parents are too unstable and too volatile to confront in that manner. I too learned it was a HUGE mistake to ...ummm...give my father the "dirty look" . For that at around 13, I was made to bend over a chair so he could strike my bottom full force using the steel wire handle of the fly swatter. It wasn't worth it and him beating me did not show me that I was wrong and bad and being disrespectful, it just proved that I no longer had anything to say and pretty much stopped communicating with him. We all did. None of us could stand him. I had no respect for that man.
Oct 05, 2009
 u have a horrible mother
by: Anonymous

maria please call the child abuse line. it makes me sick to hear about this . ia m very close to your age and i can imagine how it feels.my prayers are with you.
Oct 15, 2009
 i understand
by: Anonymous

i can absolutely understand how you want your mother to die. i would if i was in your place. i am your age and i cant imagine if my life was like yours. get help. stay strong.
Oct 16, 2009
 Get help for yourself who? ME? yes you
by: maurice

Maria 2, I want what is the best for you right now. Anonymous has said it in beautiful words to you please get help. Darlene's words in her comment, well now, you are highly articulate in the telling of your abuse to her and her visitors. I believe you to be a very inteeligent girl for your age you can understand what Darlene is saying to you. We all want what is the best for you. Wanting your Mother to die may not help you if you do not get help for yourself. She could be dead but you might be only adding to your problems. Don't feel guilty, whatever she did to you which was horrific abuse WAS NOT YOUR FAULT. I STRESS, WAS NOT YOUR FAULT. Maria 2 I'M SPECIAL, I LOVE ME, HUG THAT WONDERFUL AND BEAUTIFUL ME IN THE MIRROR ADMIRE THAT BEAUTIFUL BODY OF YOURS. It was marked, bruised, scraped to cruel finger nails to bleed. begin healing and erasing those from your body. only you can do it by getting help.
Feb 05, 2013
 The Horror
by: Anonymous

Maria, your mom is deeply troubled and sadistic. I hope you tell someone because she's too dangerous to be trusted. Beating you, scratching you, pulling your beautiful hair and even emotional abuse are horrific. I'm sure she's probably frustrated with her own life and chose to take it out on you; sadly, she never got any help she needs because no one is helping her. However, you need help too, so please tell someone you really trust.
Feb 05, 2013
 Seriously, get out of that house!
by: Anonymous

Please try to get out of that house as soon as you can, Maria, even if it means going to foster care; you've suffered enough. Your so-called mother is a mentally ill, violent person; she probably won't change until someone makes her stop. as soon as you get away from her, your healing can start in earnest.

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Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



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