Comments for Child Abuse Story From Justin1

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Jun 05, 2009
 The shame isn't yours to bear...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Justin, it is NOT shameful that you experienced an erection and ejaculated when being molested by your grandfather. The truth is, sexual stimulation feels good. Hormones and arousal are extremely powerful; and your grandfather understood that. He took advantage of your youth and your vulnerabilities. He knew exactly what he was doing. What you need to understand is that it is perfectly natural for a young male to have an erection AND yes, to even climax during a sexual assault. Females can also experience an orgasm during an assault. That does not mean that sexual assault didn't happen; it means that your body betrayed you. You have NOTHING to feel shame for; nothing at all.

The nausea you feel now about the acts that were committed are all about your values now. You are placing more mature adult values on choices you made and did not make as a child. Justin, you cannot be held accountable for such choices. Your grandfather was in a position of trust and authority over you. HE was the powerful one. HE was the adult; you were the child. Never lose sight of that.

I'm glad to learn that your grandfather is no longer molesting you. But let me be clear, your grandfather is likely molesting other boys. If there are other young boys in your family or within his reaches, he is likely doing to them what he has done to you. You see, Justin, sex offenders do not stop until they are made to stop, until someone discloses and the authorities get involved in order to force him to stop. Your mother acted as so many do: she didn't go far enough to ensure you and others were kept safe by reporting what he did to you to the proper authorities. All too often, family members decide to take such matters into their own hands, and then, as you said, "nothing comes of it". Except that something DOES come of it; something far more sinister: it is allowed to go on, unchecked. Your grandfather continues to be a danger to other children and youth. And he will, until someone acts in a way that will stop him.

I do hope you'll consider some form of counselling in order to help you through all this emotional turmoil, Justin. You didn't deserve to be sexually assaulted. You certainly deserve help dealing with it now that you have.

Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
Jun 06, 2009
 great YOU found this site a whole new attitude on your abuse will begin for you
by: maurice

Justin 1, if only your Grand Pa could realize the damage he did to you at 12 years of age. He knew waht he was at and did a grave wrong to you at the very sentive time of your growing sexually. He was very wrong Justin 1. You now have to open up your mind as to the right and wrong of your Grandpa's being self gratified doing what he did to you and you doing it back to him. Be sure It was not your fault. Justin 1 Darlene has given you most caring words of love, sensitivity, real honest truth behind those very important years of your growth sexually. Try your best to seek the professional help you need right now to acknowledge her supporting and caring words to you to make a greater sense of it all for you now. You'll be fine Justin 1, You are very articulate in your telling of what your Grand pa did. You already know it was totally unfair on you what he did. You must be brave, you must be strong in taking into account that your Grand pa could be doing the same to other boys. Darlene is right that is a real possibilty. Tell some one and talk out your own fears around that possibilty. When just a shouting from your Caring and loving mam did not make him change in what he did to you. He needs to be warned in a more serious way by authorities who will protect whoever he may be carrying out the same devious ways with. Justin 1 Always believe in yourself, begin to love yourself and that beautiful body of yours that was defiled by your Grandpa at a tender and vunerable age. You did nothing wrong Justin 1. Darlene re -assured you there. Believe her and you will be in a good space to get on with your life. Think positive thoughts, act in a positive way when the emotions of it all come back to you. Let go being positive knowing it should never have happeded to you. It was not my fault. Hi you look in that mirror and say I love me all of me. I was born beautiful therefore I am beautiful. Hi Justin 1 Say to that hunk of a guy in the mirror I can accomplish anything I want. A counsellor will put you on the right road about it all so do your best with the help of your very close family and friends to seek out that help. You'll be fine Justin 1.
Jun 27, 2009
 Your Something Special
by: Autumn

Justin 1 when I read your story I started to cry. I know for sure that you didn't deserve any of that. There are people out there in the world who love you and won't hurt you. I promise you Im one of those people who love you from the heart! Justin1you are something special and if your wondering Im only in middle school! I love you!

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stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



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