Comments for Child Abuse Story From Gaielle S Part 1

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May 02, 2009
Part 1: It WAS a different time...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Yes, Gaielle, we grew up during a time that child abuse was not really defined; indeed, the term hardly existed among those in society. Even lawmakers believed that parents had the right to do as they saw fit without fear of reprisal, without any consideration for the well-being of the child...unless the parent did great harm and left severe or life-threatening injury to a child, or committed the ultimate crime of killing their child. Even broken bones didn't necessarily yield intervention. Parents were "protected" and "excused" at almost all costs. Society generally accepted just about any form of treatment, rather mistreatment, against a child. Neglect was even more narrowly defined: no shelter, no clothes, no food. That is how it was where I grew up. The sad thing is, our generation had it better than the generation before us. The truly sad thing is that there are people who still believe in the old ways, believing that children need to be beaten into submission, beaten to behave.

You're living proof of what happens when parents believe in such draconian methods of raising their children: those children grow up making unhealthy, even dangerous, choices for themselves, because they were taught and believed they were worthless, unlovable, undeserving of dignity and respect. Why would you believe otherwise when you were so badly mistreated as a child.

I can only imagine how the mother (and father) of your husband raised him for him to become a batterer, and worse, for her to accept his brutally violent behaviour against you. She raised an abuser, and then pointed the finger of blame at you. She never made him accountable or responsible for his own vile actions, which perpetuated it. She was twisted in her thinking. You did not deserve to be mistreated, either as a child or as an adult. You deserved love and nurturing and dignity and respect.

See Part 2: An explanation re: edits to your submission... below.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

May 02, 2009
Part 2: An explanation re: edits to your submission...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Gaielle, you'll note I've edited your submission quite drastically. I had to as it did not fit into the template I use for these pages, a template that utilizes some of the 10,000-character limit set for these pages. I cut it off at a spot that I felt was logical for the issues you had exposed to that point. I'll try to post more of your story (the child abuse elements of it) in another installment, but it may take several days, as I have more than a dozen submissions in queue at the moment that also await my attention. My decision to edit in this way is in no way intended to invalidate or in any way nullify what you suffered.

Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir


May 02, 2009
Monsters for parents
by: Anonymous

Gaielle, I'm sorry that you didn't have a good family. I'm also sorry for that fact that your so-called mom actually took pleasure in calling you a "brat"; in fact, she is wrong. You are not a brat. You are kind, loveable, and worthy of love, dignity and respect. And I'm also appalled to read about your so-called mom openly displaying animal cruelty towards your dog; in fact, I respect animals, and even though I don't like dogs, that doesn't mean that they should get hurt. My uncle planned to get a German Shepard dog someday, and if he did something like that to that dog, I will be so mad at him.

As for your so-called husband, you might want to call the police on him (and his mom and sister) cuz you do not deserve to be mistreated in any way. You might also want to try counselling cuz you are worth bthe help that you deserve. Whatever happened to you is not and never will be your fault, everyone in your life is actually to blame. You can always move on, unlike your abusers; in fact, they will stay in their hell forever and they will get their karma. Awful people! Be brave and stay strong, sweetheart, cuz I'm hurting for you.

May 03, 2009
Parents had rights, children were their property, they could do as they plesed with them. neithr church/state or religion condoned what they did.
by: Maurice

Oh how right Darlene is Gaielle S, our age group lived in the draconian age, where our parents had the freedom to rear us as they saw fit/right. Your a prime example of that age. just abused, treated as a nobody, by two drunken parents who had no respect of each other so how then could they have for you or your sisters. sadly there were many families similiar to your Gaielle S. No comparing your family was yours and they and your parents did what they did to you. Making you feel as you do today miserable and I'm no good, or asking yourself the question why is this happening to me. That awful man you call your husband was part of a similiar type family as yours except his mother could not see the wrong he was doing to you. I've asked myself many a time through the years when I've experienced a husband who brutalized his wife, caused her physical injury would keep taking him back. I can still never understand it. Gaielle S great you found Darlen's site, she has offered you genuine words of Love and support and encouragement for you to begin to say I'M a Beautiful Woman/human being in my own right. I need to begin to love and care for myself in all that I've been through in my life. It won't be easy Gaielle S but if your serious about changeing it will happen for you. Letting go of your family and all they did to you, letting go of your very insane husband and all he did to you and making a life for your self won't be easy but you should and must at 57 years of age. you owe it to yourself to get a life.

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stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
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