Comments for Child Abuse Story from CM

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Jan 06, 2009
No rescuers...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

CM, I understand your feelings of betrayal and abandonment. Blood in a child's garments is a huge red flag of abuse; for whatever reason, your mother refused to see the evidence right in front of her.

The description you gave of a beating at the hands of another child's mother while others watched and did nothing sounds to me as though you come from a country where public violence against a child—any child—is acceptable; I'm not all that familiar with the laws in Malaysia, but some of the stories I've received on this site from your country certainly suggest this to be the case. When lawmakers and authorities, when society in general, all turn a blind eye to child abuse, they enable it to go on. You had no rescuers, no one to stop abuse when they saw it taking place, no one to act when they suspected it was taking place. You are now dealing with the long-lasting effects of that abuse. But that doesn't mean you will have to suffer for the rest of your life.

You said, "I had always remembered both incidents, but never in detail. I suppose it was my own way of protecting myself, and not wanting to deal with it." The human mind is an amazing machine of sorts, CM. It will only allow you to remember what it knows you are capable of dealing with. But just because you don't recall everything now doesn't mean that will always be the case. As you grow in experience, become stronger as an adult, and make your way along the road toward healing and recovery, you may find that many of those memories will suddenly come to you. If you are prepared for that possibility, you might find it less traumatic if and when it does happen.

Yes, CM, healing and recovery from child abuse is a long journey, but I have the utmost faith in your ability to walk, indeed, run that road. If there is a way for you to get into some form of counselling, I would highly recommend it. Perhaps there are support groups that you can join. Reading the multitude of stories on this site and the attached comments from my visitors and from me might also be helpful to you. At the very least, you'll know you are not alone in your pain. There can be tremendous healing in that.

Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Jan 06, 2009
Hard to forget.
by: Scott N.S Canada

I understand your feelings regarding public humiliation.I decided to not explain why but to just refer you to my story.Its all there.I'm sorry to hear of your experiences. Your not alone.

Jan 07, 2009
What an uncaring system
by: Francine

CM, that is just crazy! You'll need to try counselling cuz you deserve the help that you need. Good luck and treat yourself better than anyone else had. BTW, I can relate, at least just a bit. The pinching thing...yes, I can relate. Literally. And it hurt me, too. That was awful. I'm sorry that no one wanted to save you from your abusers, with your mom being one of them. You did nothing wrong. Even cutting some lady's kid's foot by accident DOES NOT have anything to do with doing something wrong cuz what happened to you will NEVER be your fault. Tell someone else, please! Don't wait too long.

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this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
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