Comments for Child Abuse Story From Carrie

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Jun 07, 2009
 You didn't deserve any of it...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Carrie, you've certainly been given the lion's share of mistreatment throughout your life. Don't ever lose sight of the fact that you did not deserve to be abused. You did not deserve to be raped. You did not deserve to be sent from one home to another to another.

You DID deserve love and dignity and respect. You DID deserve to have loving and nurturing parents who would keep you safe from harm. You DID deserve to have a "real" father, a father who would never lay a hand on you, much less sell you to others for their perversions. But you didn't get any of that, Carrie; and now you deal with the repercussions every day.

I know in my heart that you don't really want to die; what you want is to be out of pain. Carrie, you dealt with some horrifying abuse. Yet you survived it all. You are now in a safe place. You are no longer being abused by others. What is now happening is your thoughts of being abused haunt you. You are "reliving" the memories of abuse over and over and over again, even though the abuse is no longer happening. So you see, Carrie, it's your thoughts that are bringing the pain now, because in the present moment you are not being physically or sexually abused.

When I was in therapy years ago, my psychiatrist taught me that I myself was being emotionally abusive to myself with my thoughts. I had taken the torch, so to speak, from my mother (and father) and was mentally beating myself up every single day of my life. When I came to realize this, I came to understand that it was my thinking that had to change. When I changed what I thought, my feelings and emotions automatically changed too.

You ARE special. You ARE worthy. You ARE lovable. Keep telling yourself that. The fact that you've shared your story on this site is a testament to the fact that you want to live, that you want to be heard; and you HAVE been heard. The fact that you are trying to make your father accountable through the justice system says you want to live. Just don't tie your happiness into the outcome of a trial. Regardless of the verdict, regardless of whether or not he pays for the crimes he committed against you, YOU deserve to live. I believe you WANT to live. I do hope you have a counsellor to talk to, someone who can help you with the emotional trauma. You certainly deserve that.

Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
Jun 07, 2009
 Why younger women marry way older men
by: maurice

It rarely ever works out young woman older man. I have sadly experienced alot of such relationships on my travels throughtout Irelan from my own home place which is rural to larger towns and cities. Children of such marriages suffer alot. So carrie you are so brave to tell your story of such a marriage. Neither your Mother/father were suitable to be parents of such a lovely girl/child like you. Your Father is just one sick man. doing all that awful stuff to you and having it done to you by others. Hi Carrie there is a life for you after it all. I have equally met a number of children who switched off such parents to get on with making a life of their own and succeeded. Alwyays believe in your self. You are now the most important person now. Darlene is the best Carrie. she has given you loving, caring, words of encouragement. with the one/two of your very truen and dear friends begin getting help for yourself. Be safe, care for yourself now. KNow for certain You were not to blame for anything that pervert of a father put you through. Your Mother will always be your mother but sadly you can learn what being abused has done to her. You don't need to harm yourself or go down the same road. You are beautiful, You are unique, You are different, You have inteeligence to know better and waht is best for you. Think positive, act positive, be positive. Live well, laugh alot, LOVE MUCH. HUG yourself and say I LOVE ME. Let those close to you hug you and ease away the scars of your abuse on that beautiful body of yours.

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Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



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