Comments for Child Abuse Story From BeckiLou

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Feb 22, 2009
You weren't to blame...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

BeckiLou, I'm so glad you told, and that your mother and father stepped up to the plate and made sure that sex offender of a family member was held accountable for his criminal acts against you.

You grew up during a time when the girl was considered the one to blame, even a young girl. I grew up in that same insane culture. It was this ridiculous mind-set of sexualizing the female victim that made it so that you'd have to deal with so much more than just the abuse. You were violated by that sick pervert, and then violated again by an uncaring blame-the-victim system.

But I beg to differ with you on one aspect: your family when through HELL with your uncle. I do not believe for one second they went through HELL with you, because you BeckiLou did nothing wrong. You weren't to blame for any of it, be it the abuse or the way in which you dealt with that abuse. You coped the best way you knew how at the time, without the proper agency support, I might add. Of course depression would set in. And of course you'd be afraid of the dark, plus a host of other fears. These are all to be expected.

You're still controlled by those fears...if you aren't already in counselling, I highly recommend you seek out a counsellor to help you with those fears and to help you move forward with them. You have 4 amazing children, a loving husband, and you graduated from college; congrats on ALL of that! What's left is for you to process, really process, what happened to you as a child. You deserve that, BeckiLou, and so does your family.

Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me. It will be read, and I know it will help people.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Feb 26, 2009
he got wut he deserved
by: dana

I finally told my friend what was going on. I was 13 and she was in her early to mid 20's. She told her husband and then he told my mom. My mom walked to my uncle's house and hit him so hard that she knocked him out of his recliner backwards....im so glad u told n ur parents did somethin bout it..the kid thats bein bothered by em wont get hurt nemore n that makes me so happy!

Mar 05, 2009
I admire you!
by: Linda

Beckilou, I am so happy for you. The life you have with your husband and children are very special. For what you had to endure in your younger years was horrible. I can relate to your fear of the dark. Sexual molestation happened to me always in the dark. I have an overwhelming fear of the dark. If there are no lights on in my house, I have a panic attack and I can't breathe. But back to you, I admire your courage for telling on the "RAT" for sexually abusing you. It's a Shame he didn't get a life sentence for it. He almost destroyed your life with his perverted actions. When a child is abused and molested it changes who they are and what they become. Thank God you had wonderful parents who believed you.I think you are a lucky young woman....A big round of applause for you...

Sep 26, 2009
Good Job
by: Mitch

I could only imagine the courage it took to speak up, and I am sure there were times it seemed useless.But you have a lot of guts and it will pay off!

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