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Apr 05, 2011
To Anonymous:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

You don't want to die, you want to be out of pain. You've been abused, betrayed and abandoned by so many people in your life, it's no surprise you feel as you do. But when you call yourself "weak", I have to step up and say that's not true. Survival takes strength, a great deal of strength; and you've survived. That makes you very strong. It's not about what you appear to be on the outside, or what you are feeling on the inside; it's about getting through each and every day. As a young person, I too went around looking as though I was confident and that everything just slid off my back. But of course, that was a lie. I was terrified all the time, lacking self-esteem, and I hated myself. But then I learned that that was because I believed the lies others were either telling me directly or lies that I told myself as a result of the rejection and abuse I was forced to deal with. And when I learned that they were lies, I recognized how strong I really was. I recognize that same strength in you. Please reach out to someone who can help you. Don't hide behind the facade any longer. Talk to a trusted teacher, a school counsellor, or the parent of a friend. Tell someone what's happening in your life. Consider contacting one of the hotlines listed on my stories page, depending on where you live, in order to talk to someone confidentially. You don't deserve to be mistreated. You most definitely deserve help for the fact you have been mistreated; you're worthy of that help. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir


Apr 05, 2011
You're not weak
by: AnonymousT

Anon - you just haven't tapped into your inner strength. It's there.

Think about it for a second, if someone was abusing a puppy would you stop them? My guess is yes. Puppies are small & delicate & helpless. You would find strength to help the puppy.
Now remember yourself as a child - you were small & delicate & helpless too. You CAN find the strength to help YOU now & in return helping your inner child who was so badly abused.

Listen to Darlene, take her advice. Our life is what we choose it to be once we're old enough to make the decisions. You can do wonderful things.

One step at a time, one day at a time - you can find the healing you need. I do recommend a book, The Courage to Heal - it helped me & it was referred to me when I began my journey.

Good luck to you.

T

Apr 06, 2011
Such uncontrolled sadism
by: Anonymous

Anonymous, what your abusers did to you is pathetic and ungrateful because they are truly inhumane beasts who should've known better and loved and cherished you. You deserved so much better than what those brutes did to you. Oh, and parents and relatives who abuse their children are one of the real abusers. Oh, and did I mention that they also even abused your sister by grooming her to be antisocial towards you? You are not to blame for their sadistic, messed up behavior; they are to blame because abusers choose to abuse. You were the child; they were the adults; they had all the power and they misused it over you. Oh, and don't commit suicide because suicide is a permanent solution to most temporary problems and doing so will only let them win (and so will getting kidnapped), so don't do it; just tell someone you really trust and keep telling until he/she will finally listen to you and help you.

Apr 06, 2011
Always believe in your self: Get help: You'll be fine
by: maurice

Anonymous you are just one very brave woman with courage to put your past life in perspective so you can live it to the full: Good on you: Hi know Darlene has spoken from her heart to you she has been there where you find yourself now: She is a winner: she was a victim of abuse herself as she has related to you: But she got help, she went to therapy/counselling, she turned her pain into POWER now she is empowering you with her words and all her visitors in her personal comment to each one: So Anonymous you too will be a winner over all those sickos' who abused you, treated you inhumanly, humilated you in such a way that you lost your self worth, your dignity and respect: Hi read also anonymous comment to you she sure spoke honest to goodness words from her heart to you and put them in a comment for your benefit: You are gifted: You are tallented: you sure are intelligent: you have courage: you are brave, true and honest is what you wrote ever so honestly about what all those sicko's put you through even your mother and sister: Your own flesh and blood: they should be ashamed of themselves: Your life is all that matters now: Get help through some form of counselling: have a real friend or two your own age and gender so that you can share your secrets of the past and present with them in total trust: Have a healthy mind in a healthy body: Be safe: Stay safe: I WILL: I CAN: I MUST: BECAUSE I AM WORTH IT: YOU HAD BETTER BELIEVE IT, Tell that to the wonderful and beautiful you (me) looking out at you from the mirror: be gentle and kind to your body make it cuddly and nice and hug it to bits beacause it is yours: soothe it gently with scented oils/creams: Go on in the privacy of your bathroom treat your self with total respect: Think positive things about your self and your body then if you think negative thoughts pee them away or whatever: sorry for my little piece of vulgarity but I hope and know you'll get my meaning: ALWAYS BELIEVE IN YOURSELF:

Dec 01, 2011
don't hide behind the LIES any more!!!
by: speakout

I thought I was reading a page from my past when I came upon your story. It was amazing to actually see it written down in BLACK & WHITE. This is what I can tell you from my experience, when I finally found a trusted person to talk/tell my past to it made me realize each time I would get things out, although extremely difficult to go "back" in my past and verbally TELL, but by doing this it was like actually getting to "tell" on each of those people just as children do when they come running to there parents and "tell" on another child for doing something wrong. So if there is advice I could give you it would be to STOP hiding behind the LIES that you have been living under START telling the TRUTH on those evil people and you will see how much validation will come to you in doing just that, a ton of bricks will be lifted off your shoulders. On another note I do NOT go around those people that abused me, but it took a very long time to realize that, my biggest abuser was my mother, I am now 32 years old, and she still denies ALL the abuse. I truly wish you well, and I hope you hold God close to you, that has helped me.

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