Comments for Child Abuse Story From Adam Y

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Jan 14, 2011
Adam:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

You are applying adult more mature values to what happened to you as a child. You're not being fair to yourself. Your brother had power over you, and he misused that power. Whatever decisions you made were as a result of having no real power. You even tried to take some of that power back by negotiating with your brother, but that wasn't power at all; it was all you had at the time. You can't hold yourself responsible for any of it. None of what happened was your fault, Adam. None of it. Please consider talking to someone you trust, someone who can get you the help you need. If you are under the age of 25, I urge you to contact the Australian Kids Help Line at 1800 55 1800. KHL have counsellors who will listen to you and discuss your options. The service is available 24 hours a day for children, youth and young adults between the ages of 5 - 25. Their counselling services are free, confidential, and you can remain anonymous. You can visit their website by copying & pasting the following URL into your browser: http://www.kidshelp.com.au/template/standard.aspx?s=129&p=104&r=2&b=1

Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir


Jan 14, 2011
not your fault
by: Tim L.

I'm sorry that you had a physically abusive older brother, who did not respect your feelings, your body, your rights as a person. It sounds like he put you in a passive position already before he started to use you sexually; please don't beat yourself up for not telling back then, when clearly you couldn't; there were things keeping you silent.

I also don't think you're responsible for protecting the public image of your family who for whatever reason failed to protect you from this onslaught. So please don't think about that: anyone who doesn't sympathize with the fact that you were forced to endure regular, traumatic sexual assaults against your will doesn't deserve your time or consideration.

You don't have to publish it in the local newspaper, but bringing out your truth inside your family and personal life is essential for ensuring your own well-being and peace of mind on into the future. Start with people you know are safe, build up your confidence, and confront the truth. It will help you.

Jan 18, 2011
Do older sibling realize the repercussions on their young sisters brothers
by: maurice

Adam, STOP blaming yourself for what your older brother did to you sexually abusing you in your tender years of being his younger brother: HE knew what he was at: He sure was unfair to you: Great you had the courage to search for and find Darlene's site: Follow her loving, affirming, caring words to you: She knows best: These words are especially for you: You'll be fine: You are highly intelligent: You know now it was not your fault what your very naughty older brother did to you; Be assured he was not thinking the effects of what he did could have on you: It amazes me why parents don't cop and educate their children about the facts of life and the sexual differences as their children grow and blossom into unique and special people: Great in recent years that children can have there own room when they grow into the adolescent years: so any movements like your older brother into your room should have been monitored by your parents: being your older brother he had power and control over you: I can empathize within you to a degree because when I attended an all boys boarding school I too was abused by the older or senior boys who knew when they could bring me into the locker room: It does have it's effects on one so young as it puts unreal thinking into one's mind until one talks or tells someone what happened: The more responsible senior boys used to tell us younger ones don't let any one do un due things to you down below: It sure effects one's thinking so Adam take Darlene's advice and get some form of counseling: You'll be fine now that you have told your feelings here on Darlene's safe site: All her visitors know she has your best interests at heart: You'll be fine: have a healthy mind in a healthy body: Oh yes get out there with like-minded people your own age and sex taking part in sporting and cultural activities: You'll know the difference in a short time: Be gentle and kind to your but firm with yourself getting the help Darlene encourages you to think about and act on getting counseling: Have a true and real friend or friends who will be your strength to do always what is the best for you Adam:

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stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
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