Comments for Child Abuse Story From Jess

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Jan 03, 2012
Jess:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

It's a very good thing that you've distanced your Self from your parents. They are toxic to you. And those people who say that abuse doesn't exist unless there are bruises or other "evidence" are grossly misinformed. Emotional abuse leaves the deepest scars of all. It sounds as though you were singled out for abuse by your parents. You might find it helpful to read my article Why parents target a specific child for abuse. Just remember that the article speaks to an explanation, not an excuse, for abuse. As for your anorexia, when one has no control, one finds control where one can. You found control with your anorexia. No matter what your parents did or didn't do, you could always control whether or not you ate. It goes much deeper than that, but I would venture to say that in your case, that's how it started. Eventually, food becomes a poison, but when anorexia is as a result of control issues, it becomes ingrained in trust issues. When you begin to trust someone, you're more willing to eat. But all of that goes down the drain when the trust is betrayed. I do hope you are in counselling or therapy, and that you are dealing with the issues surrounding the anorexia and your past. If so, you'll likely learn how the choices you make for your Self tie into ongoing anorexia. Stay the course, Jess. You truly are walking the path of healing and recovery, and you're SO worth that. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

Jan 04, 2012
Such cruelty
by: Anonymous

Jess, your so-called parents are wrong. you are not fat; you are not ugly; you are beautiful. You are not hateable; you are not unlovable; you are lovable, so never believe any of those lies that they were spewing. Oh, and those nasty names that they called you are nothing but lies. Mature, stable adults don't scream and yell at anyone; mature, stable adults don't call anyone names, especially their own precious children; mature, stable adults don't choose one child over another; only mentally sick, deeply disturbed people would resort to such childish tactics. They are really acting like little 2-year-olds trapped in their grown-up bodies because they are stuck in their own childhood. Oh, and screaming at you and calling you "b****" for crying in pain at the hospital shows me how cruel they really are. You are not to blame for their cruel, ignorant behavior; they are to blame because they chose to abuse you. You were the child; they were the adults. They had all the power and only misused it over you. I really hope that you're in a safe place now and that you stay in counselling.

Jan 05, 2012
Not Alone
by: Carrie

Hi,

I'm sorry you were subject to so much torture. I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. In many ways, I felt like you were telling my story. I don't allow my family in my life either now. They still abuse me and therefore have not earned a place in my life. I am now in counseling and have been for over a year. I can tell you there is hope! Life is getting much better since I am getting help. I am enjoying life, laughing, learning how to love and receive love and trust. It is really painful, to work through everything, but it is so worth it when you come out the other side victorious and free! All the very best to you!

Carrie

Jan 13, 2012
Know it
by: Billy

I have been abused many times, not sexually but by being mocked and ridiculed as a kid.
Thanks to people that helped me I have now recovered. Remember there is hope.

Jan 14, 2012
thank you
by: Jess

Thank you everyone. I am in counseling, and I am finally making progress with it. With my parents out of my life I can work on damage done without them furthering the torment. My husband is great to me, and his parents have filled a void in my life.

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From Victim to Victory
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