Comments for Child Abuse Story From A B

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Jan 17, 2010
 A.B.
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Thank you for sharing your story and your very important message with my visitors and me. I agree with you. Teachers DO need to be trained to look for signs of abuse and neglect. You most definitely suffered emotional abuse, but also neglect. Neglect that could have led to your death. It's hard to fathom how your teachers didn't see that something was seriously wrong. The same goes for your doctor. Someone needed to have acted on the suspicions. As for your mother, there is no changing her. You can only control how you react.

You'll note I've removed your last name. I did this because I try to ensure that my visitors remain anonymous. I've meant no disrespect doing so.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Jan 18, 2010
 Things were different then
by: Scott Canada.

Hi Darlene and AB.
I have a tough time believing teachers were ever trained back then to spot abuse. My abuser was the teacher and if I recall Darlene so were some of yours. AB, if you go back and read about me its all there. My mother knew it was happening and didnt transfer me out of that classroom. If you remember me writing, she knew exactly what was happening to me.
I am also 45 and my mother is 73. I, to this day, cannot bring up in a conversation with her what happened to me when I was 8. I just cant.It is unresolved and I fear it will remain that way. I dont know if she feels sorry or even remembers or even cares. I would like to know what in gods green earth she thought she was doing "sicking" that cruel woman on me.
I believe back in those days teacher, doctors etc. were held in a much higher standing then today. All trusted, all knowing. This opened the door for abuse, neglect. Mental abuse goes right along with that whole thing. The physical abuse WAS mental abuse as well.
I remember my father interacting with other people's children when they visited and playing games and smiling and acting so warm to them. It was unreal. At home it was like he hated us. Letting this child play with matches in the house and laughing and drinking(with the child father). Putting an empty cigarette tube in the kids mouth and lighting it. It burst into flames and he jumped, and they laughed. Thats not what I remember about being caught smoking. He made such an ass of himself. He was so fake. All mental abuse. Constant and saturating.I remember a time a cousin visited and he told them that I cant even wipe my own ***bottom***. I was a kid. I didnt want another kid knowing that. A girl, a peer. Thats sick. Why would someone feel the need to torture a child's mind until it breaks.
I'm the only one that realizes that there is a problem in the family. It is broke. Everyone on their own and cold. You first have to admit that you have a problem, right? My family is so far from that. Except me!! I cant reach them, its exhausting. Its sad. AB, you aren't alone.
Abuse comes cloaked in many forms and back then they got away with so much.

Jan 19, 2010
 Teachers in my day seemed to be in co-hootes with parents
by: maurice

Fifty or more years ago is when I am talking about and seemed to be the same right up to recent years. I believe, certainly in my own childhood years, The Church, the State seemed (DID) give all the right's to Parents to rear their children in whatever way the deemed fit. Giving the Father complete control of the Family and Household. He being the bread-winner etc. My teachers at school were equally as abusive and many Fathers were in those days. The power of the Clergy was equally falsely supportive of this. So it was a difficult time for Mothers/Children. the majority of Mothers did everything possible to protect their children from the harshness of these men. More often taking the beating/hiding themselves. A percent of Mothers shared in this harshness thus abusing their children doubly. The amount of Fathers who beat their children in the name of correcting them in such a small area in the country was a very high percent. Many of my age group and younger tell me they a still living with the effects of such harshness and beating. A B You lived in such an invironment, you were neglected, you were emotionally abused. Please read Darlene's loving, caring words to you she know best. do as she suggests. you will be doing yourself justice if you follow her plam of action NOW for you. Always believe in yourself. Think positive, Act positive, Be positive, Have a healthy mind in a healthy body, get out and about, join likemended people in sports clubs, cultural clubs in your area. Notice what I am encouraging you to do. Get off your bottom and sitting around dwelling on your abuse and it's effects on you. The more you broaden your horizons rainbows will fill your life. Build up your SELF ESTEEM. have a good mirror image of yourself. I can, I will, I must because I am worth it. Don't be lazy now. no excuses.

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Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
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