Child Abuse Story From
Sam

Sam is from the United Kingdom

The following child abuse story from Sam depicts sexual abuse at the hands of her grandfather and emotional abuse at the hands of her mother.

The child abuse effects on Sam: the unanswerable, burning question of why still haunts Sam

It is sad, but I can't remember a time when the abuse WASN'T happening. I must have been very young, a toddler.

Every Saturday, I was taken by my mother to my grandfather's house. I would hide. She would tell me off for hiding. I had two brothers, but they didn't have to go. Only me.

I was sent for a nap, and my grandfather would abuse me. He showed me pornography, and then he would kiss me and push his tongue in my mouth. He would tell me to touch him. He would touch me and simulate sex. He would then make me watch him bringing himself to orgasm. I was told we would both be put into prison if I told. He would take me into the bathroom and stand me on the toilet, then fondle and rub my buttocks and rub himself against me. He would make me stand there while he masturbated against me.

It stopped when I was around 7. I am not sure why. When I was 11, I told my mother. She said it happened to her too. It also happened to other female members of the family. She knew, but still sent me there! I have no idea why. She said it wasn't bad, the abuse I suffered. She was raped. She said she felt sorry for him, because he lost his family when I told. I wasn't allowed to mention it again. The police were involved. No charges were brought. I don't know why.

I am 32, and happily married. I have daughters. I didn't want daughters because I knew I would be so worried about them. I love them and told them from a very young age that their bodies belonged to them, and if anyone tried to touch them they should tell me. It is important to me that they have the childhood I did not have.

I don't see my mother, but I wish I could ask her why she didn't try to protect me.