Child abuse story from Ashley was created June 1, 2007 and was originally posted to my child abuse stories page on May 21, 2007 as story #124. Ashley is from Delmar, Maryland, USA.
The following child abuse story from Ashley depicts: sexual abuse at the hands of her father and her father’s friend, as well as physical abuse and emotional abuse
The child abuse effects on Ahsley: self-blame, feelings that she deserved to be sexually assaulted, anxiety attacks
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The abuse started when I was around 5 years old. When my mom left my dad and me, my dad was given custody of me.
A few months after my mom left, my dad started to touch me. I didn’t like it and told him to stop. He said that he did it because he loved me and that I was beautiful. He would kiss me and touch me, and force me to touch him. He told me that I could never tell, because if I told he would do something really bad to me. He would force me to do numerous things on him. I would always resist him, but it would never work. This continued for several years.
When I was about 8 or 9 he raped me. When he penetrated me I cried out in pain, pleading with him to stop. He didn’t say anything, and continued on with what he was doing.
One night, when he had a friend of his over to the house and both were drinking, my dad and his friend started touching me. By the end of the night I had been raped by both of them.
My dad’s friend would come over to the house several times a month and would always end up raping me. My dad would hit me if I resisted. He started telling me that it was being done as a punishment, so I have always felt that I deserved what happened. I still feel like that now. It’s very hard to deal with.
When I was 15, my dad was killed in a car accident. I live with family now. They don’t understand what I went through.
I have never really been able to tell anyone what happened because I felt like I did something to cause what happened. I wish I had told someone sooner. I deal with a lot of emotional problems now. I get anxiety attacks. I don’t understand why people could hurt their own kids.
NOTE: Information pages on this site were based on material from the Canadian Red Cross RespectED Training Program. Written permission was obtained to use their copyrighted material on this site.
From Victim to Victory
How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life
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