Abused By My Uncle

by Marshall
(UK)

Stupid Crab: 
I think I was 14 and was hoping to get paper round after I got my new bike. Our family was great I remember having so much fun with my parents and my younger brother. The first time my brother saw a crab on the beach he freaked out. Seriously cool until he pick up a rock and wanted to crush it. I stopped him picked up the crab and put it a bucket. Told my brother we had to put it back in the water because it was lost. We spent the best part of an hour sitting in the surf watching this crab until our parents shout for us. My brother tip up the bucket and let the crab go.

Then their was our Uncle, really like him. Always round the house helping Dad with something after work. Always stay for a meal before he went home. He owned a small supermarket and always stopped by on his way home with groceries for Mum. He never stay open late like the big stores 5pm was enough he said because of his customers were parents taking and collecting their kids from school.

We were all sat down eating when I asked my parents if I could apply for a paper round. All the kids at school had one and I wanted to start saving money for holidays and Christmas. Really I just wanted to be able to buy more sweets then the kid in front of me. Then my uncle said he could use some help in his shop on a Saturday, just the morning though he said I still needed to enjoy the weekends. Also I would probably earn as much for one morning compared to a full week of delivering newspapers. My parents agreed. That Saturday I was to start work at 9am sharp.

I honestly could not wait. Mum dropped me off at my Uncle's shop. He introduced me to D--- and said I was to work with him all morning. I thought I would be working with my Uncle but D--- seem okay, he was at college and he worked everyday. Most of D---'s work was filling shelves and fridges which was pretty easy until he started correcting my mistakes. Always face the labels to front he because not everyone can read and the pictures on the labels help. In the fridges, always put the fresh stock behind the stock that is already on display. At noon my Uncle came over and said time to finish and asked how I like it, Been great I said, he paid me. I said goodbye to D--- and went out to meet Mum.

That was how things went for two weeks until D--- left and my Uncle asked me if I could work all day on a Saturday while he found somebody to replace him. Mum was not overjoyed until my Uncle mentioned that i would get two half hour breaks and an hour over lunch.

First Saturday was great. Mum brought my brother with her when it was lunch. That afternoon though my Uncle was following me round all the time asking how i was doing and leaning over me when he wanted to checked something. I just thought he was checking that i was doing as good a job as D--- used too. (Never thought anything of it until i look back from were i am now) Next Saturday when he picked me up, we were laughing and joking in the car as he drove to the shop. Still laughing when he unlock and i walked in. He slapped my buttocks and said lets get to it sunshine. I just laughed but he had never done that before and Mum and Dad had always told me never to let anyone do that. They would not do it so why should somebody else. Plus we always had talks at school about strangers and i always told my parents about those talks. We even used that time to talk about stuff with my little brother. My Uncle seem to be checking on me every 15 minutes or so. Just before lunch he in the storeroom he slapped my buttocks again jokingly. Still at lunch i did not tell Mum, he was my Uncle maybe he just did things differently at his shop. After lunch the first thing he did was slap my buttocks and said almost finish. Too be honest something inside me wanted to finish there and then but I was being stupid until it happened a fourth time and I told him to stop doing that. Dad told me no one is supposed to do that. He said he was sorry and was just making sure I was okay working on my own without D---. I told him I was fine but I did not like that. We just left it at that. The only thing going through my mine when he drove me home was one word. (tell, tell, tell, tell, tell).
Uncle was staying for his usual meal and everything was going okay. I felt like my teeth were spelling out that one word every time I took a bite though. Dad got up to get something from the kitchen and I follow him, think I was actually crying. Once in the kitchen I said Dad then ran to him and put my arms around him. He said Christ what's wrong, I said you know you and mum have always said never to let anyone ever touch me. He drop to his knee and asked if somebody had touch me and i told him about Uncle slapping my buttocks all day, that i was really sorry i let it happen you always said it was wrong and i wasnt going to say anything but you always said i should and i dont want to get Uncle into trouble because i told you and i. WOAH he said it's okay, it's okay, lets dry those tears and I will talk to your Uncle okay. Now your going to go get your brother and take him upstairs okay while we talk. With that we went back to the table and I took my brother upstairs. I was trying to listen but could not hear anything, there was no shouting or anything. Mum came up first and asked if I was okay and I said yes are you angry, she said no never, she could never be angry because I told the truth but she said she thinks my Uncle was only playing with me. That's what I thought but you always said to tell if somebody did that to me. You was right to she said and Uncle will never ever do that to you again, He is really upset because he thinks he scared you. Dad has told him that we have always told you to tell us if somebody did that to you and you did just great. Uncle isn't mad at me then I asked, no he is mad at himself at the moment for scaring you. Anyway we are all going out for dinner tomorrow so we can show you were not mad okay. Okay

Everything was fine, Uncle went back to being Uncle for about two before he raped me in the back of his shop before he drove me home. He was nasty and threatening and if I told anyone I would be in big trouble and so would my parents because they didn't tell the police earlier they would be locked up for not telling anyone and he knows that I know telling is important. what would the police do to my parents if they found out they didn't tell. I got out of his car and went inside, Uncle drove off. Mum Shouted to get washed food's nearly ready and I ran to the bathroom. Ten minutes later I was screaming naked at the top off the stairs. Mum came running through shouting what's the matter. I JUST SHOUTED IT WONT STOP BLEEDING, IT WONT STOP BLEEDING. I passed out.

That was almost five years ago . My ----- is in prison but it took almost six months till his trial. We moved out of our lovely house into a different town 3 years ago. The worst thing was Mum and Dad almost separated, I am glad they didn't. My little brother is not so little anymore he is 12. We went to the beach today and he came running up to us with this stupid little crab in his hand and I just started crying. Mum just hugged me, 19 and being hugged my Mum on a beach because I'm crying all because of a stupid little crab.

I would say things are getting better but to be honest today I would be lying. Lots of things changed, especially after the trial before that I don't really remember much or I just don't want to. We are building new lives basically and we are getting better as we go. I suffer bouts of depression and I cannot still walk into any small shop without being physically sick. Told my parents several times over the last three years that I feel like I want to die. 16 years old and I sat down with my parents eating a meal and I told them in front of my brother I wanted to die. Shocked the hell out of them because all the counselling and therapy I hadn't even so much as mentioned anything like that. That was then, I think they are more scared if I stop talking to them so we talk in therapy all the time. My brother is not a daft little 12 year old, he knows what's what though we don't openly discussed certain things in front of him. He knows to look after me, little big man he is. I was up for going to University but that's on hold, working with Dad. Going to college part time to make my grades better. Fell behind a bit but concentrating on sciences because I think I just love science. Things are getting brighter but in counselling the other day I just spurted out that I wish I had taken a paper round instead. Not sure why I said that but something inside me laughed. Oh and my brother brought that stupid little crab home with him.

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