Relationship Violence Story From Jarde

by Jarde
(Location Undisclosed)

Guys never loved me: 
It all starts at 11 my first guy he use to treat me like dirt he loved but then he didnt i was the smallest out of all my friends and he would tell me how my cousin was prettyer then me and looked better i thought i was ugly he left me when i refused to have sex with him.

Then when i was 13 i started dating a guy he said he loved me but he was very controlling. I couldnt dress a certain way i couldnt go places and hang out with certain. so then we began to have sex if i didnt want to do it he would hit me which am a very small girl and he was big i would cry for hours and then suck it up. Then we broke up.

Then i met another boy i loved him with all my heart but he didnt feel the same he would cheat,lie and everything sometimes he would leave me for weeks and never talk to me which made me depressed i tried to hurt myself i didnt want to be alive he mental made me feel like i wasnt worth anything and he made me feel like no guy would ever wanna love me. then one day i found he new my friend and he was messing with her behind my back and she also was biggier then me to he told he didnt date me beacuse he was embrassed of me. I craved to have guys attention cuz my parents werent giving it to me i am a middle child my older sister was bad and eneded up prego that they thought i was next my younger brother is very soft so he gets baby and then there was me left all alone felt like i wasnt loved. then my sister had her baby and would make me watch it well she went out. i was 11 trying to feed a 2 month 2:00 in the moring i begged my mom to take him finally she this goes on i have so much angrey and hate in me but this is what helps me make it through this world. If i can survive the mental,physical and emtoinal abuse i can do anything but i will all ways have the scars and i will never be able to trust a man again.

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Comments for Relationship Violence Story From Jarde

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Apr 20, 2010
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

You are trying to find what you need, what you didn't get from your home environment, through a boyfriend. That never works. I must also say that I am very disturbed that at 11 years old, you actually had a "boyfriend" that you believe you "loved". Even at 13, that boy wasn't interested in "loving" you; he was all about getting sex from you. Jarde, you must learn to love yourself first and foremost. If you are a minor, please consider talking to a counsellor at school to help you with your self-esteem issues. Consider contacting one of the hotlines listed on my stories page, depending on where you live, in order to talk to someone confidentially. If you're still in a relationship violence situation, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233). They have advocates available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week who can provide crisis intervention, escape planning, information and referrals to victims or anyone calling on their behalf. You can visit their website by copying & pasting the following URL into your browser:

Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coach.
Darlene Barriere
author. speaker. survivor. coach
Talk Before Touching® Series

Apr 21, 2010
Enjoy your life to the full: Me, I'm Special
by: maurice

Oh how I feel for you Jarde, Through my work journeying with families and their children for over 40 years I had to advice and encourage Children and teenagers to have a life before getting hung up on relationships. Especially taking having boyfriends too seriously. Get out there and have a life for yourself with your friends. Have a healthy mind in a healthy body it will put your life in perspective for you. Intergrate and mix with your class mates and friends naturally, taking part in sporting and cultural activities with each other. The more you intergrate naturally with boys and girls then you will all understand each other better and enjoy having fun without getting into havinga boyfriend too young. Jarde, you are a very intelligent young person in your own right, I am certain Darlene's comment will make real sense to you: Don't blame yourself for having bad experiences with children/boys like yourself: I am sure it was innocence that led you into such: Maybe because of your older sister having boys and a baby you felt it was the thing to be doing. Learn from the bad experiences but don't let that put you off having boyfriends when your truly ready for them and in control of what you want from such a relationship. Value and respect yourself first, respect your body, I'm the most important person in any relationship. Be safe, be sure, learn from your sister I would regard her having a baby as far too soon in her life. I am certain you know what I mean. especially when she had you baby sitting wheile she went out to enjoy herself as a Teenager: You live your life first, then when you are ready settle down with the right man of your choice. Notice I said of your choice. That beautiful body of yours you must respect. No better way than to be active and alive with others your own age in sporting and cultural activities. There is safety in Numbers. You'll al help each other have good and wholesome times together and build friendships naturally. So Jarde, thank you for your honesty. Darlene certainly has given you loving and sincere thoughts to work with. Always believe in yourself. don't be hurt by anyone, you deserve the best in your life, go for it and reach your goals.

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