Child Abuse Story From VLM
by V
(USA)
I was 6 years old when it started in foster care, with foster cousins in their early 20's I think maybe older. I sat down the floor to play Mario Bros. game (summer of year 1990). Jason started touch and trying to tickle me but his hand kept going into my underwear. I didn't say a word. He laid me on my back and Phillip came over and held me down and put his finger inside of me. I felt scared. This went on seems like forever. I saw Jason rubbing baby oil on himself. At the time I did not know anything about sex. Phillip had lift up my Care Bear nightgown. He came over with no pants on and stood in front of me. I turned my head to the side because this was too much for me to see. He got down on the floor and I tried to get up but I was pulled back to the floor and he removed my underwear. The next thing I knew I felt pain that was unbearable ripping through my body. He was so heavy. It hurt so much I could not scream. I could only cry silently. They took turns that night. Then I blacked out.
I woke up and it was morning. I smelled like pee because I did it on myself. My vagina was burning and bleeding. My foster give me a bath. At the time I did not know she knew, even though she gave me a bath and meds to sleep. She was an RN Nurse. I finally knew when she came in the room one night as Phillip was on top and inside of me. I reached out towards her for help. She looked at me for awhile and turned and left the room. She protected her grandson and not me.
What was left of me was gone. I was beat because I didn't want to. I stopped struggling by the time I was 9. I had grown up in it so much that I used it. I would willing give them oral sex for candy, to go outside, or whatever. Anal and vaginal sex was still hard. Also by this time my foster mother had got another girl a year younger than I. I feel like I am to blame because I could have told the social worker when he dropped her off to live there about things that were happening in that home but I said nothing and it happen to her.
We were playing dolls. Phillip called her in the room to show her something. She did not come back. I heard crying and whimpering and I knew. I laid on the floor and cried. Long story short, I left at the age 10 1/2 because my aunt wanted to adopt me. I didn't tell anyone. I suppressed it. A few months later something triggered it and I had a massive flashback. I couldn't tell present from the pass and I tried to kill myself with a knife. I went into the hospital and stayed in different treatment centers across the UN until I was 16 1/2 and been trying to cope with it.
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