Child Abuse Story From Sarah

by Sarah
(Wales, United Kingdom)

My uncle 
When I was 4 years old, I accidentally walked into the bathroom when my uncle was going to the toilet. I was shocked, went oops and was about to leave the bathroom when he called me back and told me it was OK. He finished his business, and flushed the toilet. His penis was still hanging out. He pulled me into the bathroom and closed the door. He said I hadn't done any thing wrong. He told me to look at his penis and asked if I wondered what it felt like. I didn't answer him. He took my tiny hand and moved it up and down his penis. He laughed as he was doing it. I was too young to understand what he was doing was wrong, but I still cried. I was scared. When he saw the tears in my eyes, he told me it was OK and that only people that love each other did this. He finally stopped and told me that I wasn't to tell anyone, and if I did, they wouldn't believe me anyway.

That was the first time I was abused by him, but it wasn't the last. The second time, he came into my room when I was having a nap. I woke up to feel my legs being kissed. At first I thought it was my dog licking me, but it was him. I got up and was scared. He told me it was OK and that it's what people do when they love each other. He asked if I loved him. I said yes. He climbed into bed with me and pulled my skirt and my underwear down and pulled my legs apart and performed oral sex on me. It hurt me so much. I cried and begged him to stop. When he finally did stop, he took me in his arms and kissed and cuddled me. He asked me if he hurt me, and I said yes. He said he didn't mean to, he just wanted to show how much he loved me. He asked if I loved him. I said yes. He kissed me on my mouth and called me his special girl.

My uncle left that week, back to the United States.

When I was 10 years old, I heard my uncle was moving back to the UK for good. I heard he was going to be moving in with us until he got a place to stay. I didn't remember what he had done to me, so I was thrilled when I heard he was living with us. My uncle moved in with us after a week or so.

One night, my parents left me alone with my uncle. Bedtime came. My uncle followed me to my bedroom and closed the door behind him. I wanted to change into my bedclothes and asked him to leave. He said it was OK, he'd seen me naked before. I wondered what he meant, but didn't ask. When I took my clothes off, my uncle came from behind me and began to touch me. I asked him to stop. He took my hand and brought me to my bed and told me it was OK and we'd played these games when I was little so it was normal. He put me on the bed and took my underwear off and kissed my private parts and touched me again.

My uncle continued to touch me while he stayed in our house. When he finally moved out, I was relieved. As years went by, and my parents went to visit my uncle, I made excuses so I wouldn't have to see him.

My uncle raped me when I was 14 years old. I was forced to go to his birthday party. He spiked my juice with alcohol, and as I drank it he led me upstairs to his bedroom. He took my clothes off and forced himself on me.

After a month or so I found out I was pregnant. I didn't know what to do. I stupidly went to my uncle and told him. "That's alright, Sarah. I'll fix it for you," he said. And then before I knew it, my uncle started to beat me up and kick my stomach. I begged him to stop. Suddenly I saw blood everywhere. My uncle called an ambulance and told the paramedics he'd seen a bunch of people beat me up.

After that horrible experience, the doctors told my parents I had been pregnant and I lost the baby. My parents were horrified. They asked me who the dad was. I cried uncontrollably, and then I finally told them what my uncle had been doing to me. My father didn't believe me, but my mother knew I was telling the truth. She told my father if he ever brought my uncle near me again she'd leave him.

My mother kept her promise. My father continued not to believe me and continued to see my uncle, which caused arguments between both my mom and him. So my mom left him, taking me with her. We moved away from the area both my dad and uncle lived in. My mom got me counselling.

I am now 17 years old and am trying to get on with my life. I don't see my dad at all. I hate him so much for choosing his brother over me, for not believing me. It's his loss, right? Please tell me I'm right and he was wrong.

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