Child Abuse Story From Patricia

by Patricia
(Toronto, Ontario, Canada)

I've read about ten of these stories and you guys have convinced me to share as well. I'm still a bit confused about this part of my life and can't seem to make sense of it. I was abused by my dad at the age of 4 as well, but that's a different story. I'm thinking maybe if I read people's comments that maybe I'll be able to classify this as abuse. I read this one story and the guy said he continued to let it happen because it felt good. After I read that I decided to share.

I'll call him Jack. Jack is the father of my two cousins. He married my 1st cousin when I was 7. I am now 20, so you see, I've known him for years. My cousin ended up going psycho—she literally drove Jack's car off a cliff because she claimed that God told her too. Obviously, she's still alive.

My mom cheated on my step-dad with Jack, but they all knew about it. My mom started to stay over at Jack's, and I hated her for it. You see my nanny raised me, so when she died, my mom couldn't handle the stress. She had a mental illness that I suffered for. She was never around. And when she was around, it wasn't good.

I hated Jack, because at 14, I felt like I had no one because of him. I felt like my mom forgot about me. I had my two brothers, but I moved around a lot. I was alone, trying to find stability, while Mom stayed with Jack. I lived with numerous family members who didn't want me. I moved back in with my mom and Jack after my aunt Julie and uncle Ron kicked me out...I had no where to go...what was I suppose to do? The house my aunt and uncle lived in was disgusting, full of rats, mice, etc. I still remember how cold it was during the winter.

Mom was with Jack for two years at this point. I hated him to the point that if he asked me if I wanted a drink, I'd say go f*** yourself! I was an angry kid, not my fault, I know that now.

I remember one time Jack said, "Stay in the house, stay in the house!" as he ran outside. Idiot! 18 cops and rifles later, 23 pounds of weed in the house. Thanks for the warning. I'm 14 flushing 400 plants down the toilet...intense.

I've seen them fight to the point where my mom tried to run him over with the car. He threatened to burn the house down with us in it. He also said he was going to kill my dog...all talk, but still!

My mom and Jack broke up after we moved out of the dirty house. She finally realized she didn't need a man...she got somewhat financially and mentally stable. I was so glad when she got medicated. We used to fight insanely. She broke my dresser drawer over my back...there's worse but...old news.

It was my 17th birthday. Jack was friends with my older brother. He told my brother that he wanted to throw a party for me. So that day, my brothers and I went to Jack's mom's for my birthday and chewed these insane B.C mushrooms. I drank a lot too. The party animal that I WAS—I'm not a party animal any more—I stayed up longer than anyone else, and so did Jack. I could see that my brother was trying to stay up too because he'd always had this sixth sense thing with me...it's weird...like he knew something was gonna happen. He suspected more later when, on several occasions, I would sneak out of the house to see Jack. But my brother finally went to bed. That's when Jack started to tell me how much he was thinking about me, and about these dreams. He started to kiss me. I was hammered, so I didn't care. Somehow, we ended up in the laundry room with my pants off. He went down on me for a while, and then we ended up in the bedroom and just fell asleep.

The next day, he drove everyone home before I got up...we were hours away. I got up, got dressed and packed my stuff. He came back a couple hours later. He came downstairs and we just smiled at each other...he was my mom's boyfriend people!

We got in the car and drove for about an hour. We kissed a few times. I was 17. He was like 39, I think. We continued this for eight months, until I finally put an end to it. We would see each other about three times a week and have sex for hours. He showed me everything I know when it comes to that topic. He told me he loved me, but to me it just felt good, you know. Not only did he take my mom from me, but then he took me away from my mom. She doesn't know...thank god. The thing that I can't understand is that if he loved my mom how could he do such a thing to me? It's messed me up. I stopped going to school and hit a serious drug phase. He supplied my drugs...I could go on, but I think I've written enough.

Just so you know, I am now an "A" student, about to hit university!!!

Before commenting on the legalities of this story, please read comments written by Darlene Barriere for an understanding of Canadian law and how they relate to sexual abuse/assault.

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