Child Abuse Story From Pamela S

by Pamela S
(Northern Ireland)

My Primary Story: 
I have decided to write about the physical abuse that I suffered while at primary school. I am hoping that this will be therapeutic for me. I know that there have been worse cases of abuse and that someone else very close to me was sexually abused at another primary school in the 1960’s but I feel that I must tell my story for me.

I began Stranmillis Primary School in 1968. The old school had closed and it had moved from “up the hill” to a new building on the more affluent part of the Stranmillis Road.

I don’t remember much about starting school but I have horrid vivid memories of my first year in primary one.

I had the misfortune to have a teacher called Mrs H; to say that she invoked fear into children was an understatement.

My birthday was in June so I was one of the youngest in the class at just four years old. It was not long after I started school I began to hate every minute of it. Mrs H was a terrible bully and no matter how hard I tried to stay out of her line of fire, I was always unsuccessful.

Every morning we had maths and how I dreaded it! I couldn’t do my sums at all and I would try to copy the work of whoever was beside me because I figured they couldn’t be as bad as me! Mrs H would beat me if I didn’t know the answers and she was always so bloody cross, she was terrifying. She would whack me around the head daily and she didn’t hold her punches. On one occasion she took a biro pen to my head and hammered it heavily into my scalp. I remember thinking that I was going to die that day with the pain.

I used to go home from school at lunch time and beg my mother not to send me back again.

One Friday afternoon my Mum found me alone and crying in the front room of our house. I told her how Mrs H used to hit me every day and how I longed to get out of her class. My Mum couldn’t believe it. Mum recalls that in those days teachers were highly respected and no-one would have dared to speak against them but Mum went to see Mrs H on the Monday morning. Of course Mrs H denied ever hitting me and any bruises were always hidden under my hair. She told my Mum that I had a very vivid imagination and called me up in front of the class. She made me lie in front of Mum and say she didn’t hit me, which I did because I was so terrified of her. She told Mum I must have dreamt it all.

Mum had not left the classroom ten minutes until she would thump me round the head again. I used to pray that Mum would hide around the back of the school and look through the windows and catch her out, but it never happened.

Teachers were so well respected that they would be believed over a four year old pupil every time.

I was relieved at the end of P1 when I got the name of my P2 teacher and it was good bye to Mrs H, unfortunately only for a year as at age 6 I was sent back into her class for P3.

I don’t know how I got through those years. I still cringe at the thought of Mrs H, I don't know why but she must have hated me.

I remember that she had her favourites, C--- and E---. They were both clever and got all their questions right. Mrs H would say “why can’t you be like C---/E---, why do you have to be so stupid”. She also encouraged the children to bully. I remember her laughing when they taunted and teased me for having “ginger hair and being stupid”. The physical assaults were the worst though.

Another day at school for some reason treats were to be given to the pupils. We were to be given orange juice and biscuits at break time. I was last in the queue and when it came to my turn the juice had ran out and there were no more biscuits either. I hated that school.

I was one of Mrs H’s pupils who regularly would “wet themselves” in class. This would lead to further ridicule by her and her favourites.

The reason I have decided to write about Mrs H is partly because my Mum recently gave me a piece of paper which I had written some 40 years ago in which I stated I hated school! Mostly though because Mrs H must be very old now but I would still like to know for myself and on behalf of the other students who she bullied why she treated us so badly, in particular myself when I was only 4-6 years old?

I don’t think Mrs H expected much of me but I would like her to know that I am graduating from Higher Education with an Higher National Certificate in Health and Social Care this September.

Surely other teachers at the school at that time must have had their suspicions about Mrs H. And the Principal Mr W and then Mr S surely they must have known what was going on in their school.

I support the Children (NI) Order in that the welfare of the child is paramount and I was relieved that around 1975 when I left Stranmillis Primary School corporal punishment was disallowed in schools.

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