Child Abuse Story From Paige

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Child Abuse Story From Paige

by Paige
(Kentucky, USA)

My Living Nightmare:
I am now 16 years old and I have been sexually abused by a couple people in my life. It started when I was little. I don't really remember much but my brother would touch me in places and make me touch him in places that were not appropriate. That lasted for a few months until I moved out with my mom and he stayed with my nan.

Then when I moved in with my mom, she was a very bad alcoholic and her boyfriend was on drugs. In my bedroom my bed was in the way and my door wouldn't shut all the way. So when I would get out of the tub and go to my room to get clothes he would stare at me until I got dressed. I would always act like I didn't see him standing there. I told my nan what had happened and my mom. My mom didn't believe me. She thought I was just saying that to make her leave him. Well, after that it stopped.

In the 7th grade I was a cheerleader for the middle school. I had cheered all my life with this one girl and she was ahead of me one year. So she was in 8th grade at the time. One night I spent the night with her because my mom had to work and couldn't take me to cheerleading practice. We slept in the same bed. It was about 5 o'clock in the morning when her step dad came in her room and was "playing" with my privates to wake me up. When I woke up he told me to go in the other room. I didn't think nothing of it at first. Then he came in and he was alone. He sat down on the bed and pulled me on his lap and was rubbing my breast. He would keep asking me if he could see them and if anyone had ever seen them. I kept saying no. Then he got mad and threw me on the bed and told me that if my friend walked in we would just say that we were wrestling. Then he laid on top of me and rubbed his privates against mine. Then he placed his hand down my shorts. After that he undressed me. I started screaming, "NO!" He put a pillow over my face and he started raping me.

I have never went back to her house. Since then I found out he has been doing that to his step daughter ever since he married her mom. He also did that to another one of our friends. They both pressed charges and took him to court but nothing became of it, except that he wasn't allowed so close to her. But her mom kicked her out and is still living with the man that did that to us.

Now that I am 16 years old I still think about it all the time. It's hard for me to have a real relationship with a guy. I can't trust them or be me around them. Every time I see him in town I freak out and have attacks. He still says perverted things to me but I try to get away asap. I have to live with this for the rest of my life. I don't think I will ever to be able to have sex and not think about what has happened in the past!

Note from Darlene: The volume of contributor submissions has now made it impossible for me to comment personally (especially in great detail) on each and every contribution. If I haven't left you a comment or one that is in-depth, please do not take my lack of a personal response as a slight, or as a statement that your story is somehow unworthy of my time. Nothing, and I do mean nothing, could be further from the truth. If there was a way for me to respond to all of you at length, I would.

Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited, and could result in being banned from making further comments on this site.

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Child Abuse Story From Paige

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May 24, 2009

Understandable feelings...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Paige, I can understand that you can't get this out of your mind, and that you are concerned that it will affect your ability to have a relationship with a man, especially an intimate relationship, later in your life. And I can understand why you might think that all guys are like this. You've certainly been exposed in some terrible ways: your brother (who I suspect was sexually abused himself), your mother's boyfriend, your friend's stepdad. But please don't lump all men in the category that this sex offender is in. He's a child rapist; believe me when I tell you that the vast majority of men AREN'T like this sick excuse for a human being, or like your brother and your mother's boyrfriend. It hasn't helped that your mother has not stepped up for you with her perverted boyfriend. It concerns me that you are still in that environment. Even if he's stopped doing what he was doing you are at risk.

You're going to need help with all this. You're going to need to speak with a counsellor/therapist, if not now, at some point in the near future so that you can deal with your feelings, emotions and trust issues. If a therapist isn't an option right now for you, consider talking to your school counsellor; perhaps she can offer you some resources. Child Help at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) is another resource you can contact in order to talk to someone. They are staffed 24/7 with professionally trained counsellors who will listen to you.

Understand this: None of what's happened is your fault. NONE OF IT! You have done nothing wrong. You are not to blame for any of it. You didn't deserve to be molested or mistreated in any way. And when you told on your mother's boyfriend, you didn't deserve to be called a liar. Your mother has serious problems. She's not seeing clearly. (And neither is the mother of your friend!). She is confused and troubled in her thinking. You, Paige, deserved—and still deserve—so much better. Keep your head up. You're a good person; don't ever lose sight of that. You are also a survivor.

I wish you all the best, dear. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

May 24, 2009

I understand.
by: K.C.

I know somewhat of how you feel. I am afraid that the only relationship I am ever going to have with someone is a sexually relationship because I was sexually abused.

I can't believe that the court didn't do anything about it. You need to try and catch him in the act, if its possible. Just don't be around him. It's a good thing that if you see him you leave.

May 25, 2009

The mystery of it all baffles me
by: maurice

It is still a real mystery to me after all the information of abuse out there that it is wrong. wrong very wrong. Yet Paige you have a sick mother who needs loads of help her self allowing not listening to you when your brother did wrong things to you, when she did not listen then she ain't going to listen now. Your Nan too, Then for the courts to leave him off scott free or with a warning is totally wrong and most unfair to you and his step daughter to name just you two. He is a very bad man to have around. Paige great you had the courage and were brave enough to put your story on Paper to Darlene's site and share it with her many visitor who can feel your pain and emphatise with you. Oh please Paige with the help of your cheerleader friend get help for yourself beacuse you are the most important person in it all. Don't you blame yourself none of what happened to you was your mistake or fault. Just a sick man taking advantage of you and his step daughter with a mother who does not seem to care what happens to you. Very sad, very mysterious Paige. There is someone who really cares for you so with your cheerleader friend and possibly others get them to assist you in getting the HELP you need right now. Love yourself might sound silly to you now Paige but begin to and I assure you it will work wonders for you personally.

May 26, 2009

its gunna be hard
by: Aimee

hey i know that it is hard to think you can have a stable relationship, but it will come. You will find someone that is understanding of what happened to you. I was abused for 13 years of my life (i am now 20) i had relationship problems most of my life. I had a daughter at the age of 18 by a POS i thought was the love of my life. After being around so many bad apples, you will know when a good one comes along. I am now happily married, and he is there for me when i have nightmares, panic attacks, or just need to talk. You will never forget what happened to you, but you will learn to cope with it...there are plenty of people im sure of it that care about you and are going to be there for you. Dont ever hold anything in, that will only make it worse, always find a way to talk about it.

May 31, 2009

There is that special someone there for you
by: maurice

More than likely Paige that is not going to make real sense to you right now but you must not give up on yourself or give up on HOPE. Aimee is a proof of that she found on genuine caring person and yes that one is out there for you too. Begin to LOVE yourself Paige, and slowly you'll make sense of Darlene's words to you and her visitors who care for you very much. Don't Quit when one reaches one's lowest ebb the only way back is up. Hi get seeing that beautiful and wonderful person in the MIrror. I love Mirrors now Paige, like you I too thought it was silly to be saying nice things about myself. I certainly got great comfort saying the part of me that was abused is beautiful, nice etc it did me a power of good. Paige you say nice things about yourself. I can do it, I will do it, I must do it for ME.

Jul 07, 2009

JAIL
by: mary1

SOME PEOPLE LIKE THAT NEED TO BE PUT IN JAIL

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Child Abuse Story From Paige

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Child Abuse Story From Paige