Child Abuse Story From MK

by MK
(Location Undisclosed)

My Past, Present, and Future: 
I'm 15 years old and I have been having a long suffer with emotional abuse and physical abuse. Before I was even born, my father who is 52 now, put emotional abuse and physical abuse on my older siblings. I remember my brother telling me he and my sister would be playing Legos, and if they were too loud my father would throw a shoe at them. He always swears and tries to put us all down.

My father is an alcoholic, a drug user, extreme bipolar but refuses to take medication, and is a very big hypocrite. He would always come home late from partying or high on drugs. He would always put us down; nothing was good enough in his eyes no matter how hard we would try. I would always wake up to him talking in his sleep like he was talking with the devil himself; it scared me. He would always go in the bathroom and lock the door and take drugs. That all backfired on him when he got Hepatitis C from a 'drug buddy'.

I thought it would be all over when he suddenly started going to church and praying for a while there. But then he got back to his old ways.

My mom will always have faith he will get better but my siblings and I think otherwise. The drugs will always be calling forth for him; dormant, waiting to be released.

He always criticizes us harshly about every little detail possible even though we are all working hard.

My brother is an electrical engineer but in his teens he had depression and thoughts of suicide. My sister is a nurse who also had depression in her teens. I myself have depression, but luckily will not have thoughts of suicide but it's always in my mind the lack of affection he always had toward us.

He became very violent years ago when my sister was my age and one day when she was sick and did not want to go to school he hit her with a mirror and it smashed and cuts and blood were all over her arm, making her go to school; but we kept it a secret.

My friends would always ask about my dad and say how they never saw him when they came over. I would just say he worked night shift; that was not the case. I would hide my emotions which made me even more depressed which resulted in computer addictions, sleeping disorders, and also eating disorders. My friends then knew something was wrong so I finally let go of all the secrets. I never went to a counselor, not because my family told me not to; it's because I'm afraid of what will happen. I am shy at heart which made me not want to do it.

I realize to this day that my mom might not want to divorce him; but if it wasn't for her I would be out on the streets or dead. She cares deeply for us and she is my everything. I might not have the burden of my father off my shoulders; but I've had a weight lifted off me from the amount of support I have had from my siblings, my mom, and my friends. I am a lot happier than before. What my father says now means nothing to me and I ignore it. That is what I cope with best. I won't let him ever get the best of me. I have learned to never lose faith, because it will be worth it in the end.

Note from Darlene: I regret that I can no longer continue the practice of commenting on visitor submissions to the degree I have in the past, as I am currently writing a book on healing from child abuse. I ask that you please read my post of June 24, 2009 titled Announcement Regarding my Comments for a complete explanation. I welcome you to follow my progress on my Facebook page at Healing from Child Abuse. When you get there, don't forget to click onto the Become a Fan link. I do hope to hear from you there.

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