Child Abuse Story From Maggie

by Maggie
(Walkerton, Ontario, Canada)

I started being physically abused at age 2. It got worse when I started kindergarten at age 5. I was being beaten with belts and extension cords, slapped and knocked into things, and thrown across the room. I sometimes went without anything to eat. I was an outcast at school. I never had clean clothes, and sometimes I had to wear the same clothes for 3 days in a row. I was hit with sticks, switches, and leather belts. They didn't care where it hit me. A lot of times it would catch my back, but most of the time it was my face.

When I was 3 years old I started being sexually abused by my dad. He would come into my room and say to me that this is what all little girls got. That it's what Daddy's do to little girls, but that I had to keep it a secret because people would be jealous. He told me I was special, and that I was his "little toy." I didn't know better.

He walked into my room one night, laid me down on the bed, took off my clothes, and he undressed. I remember he was kissing me all over. He was rubbing me and he put his fingers inside me. I was crying. I kept telling him to stop it hurt, but he kept saying he had to do it because it's what Daddy's do. He sat me up on the bed and stuck it in my mouth. I remember pushing away, but he held my head and forced me to have oral sex with him. He did that for awhile and then did oral sex with me and penetrated me. I remember crying and screaming. This went on all night.

Each time he would walk in my room I would hide and curl in the corner. I was scared. I remember another time when I was 8 years old, he had friends over and they took turns. I was done front and back many times.

When I was 13, I remember one time coming home from school and they were in my room, 5 of them, including my dad. They had a camera and they videotaped it. My dad forced me to do it. I was raped over and over by the other guys and my dad had his hands all over me, inside and out. His mouth was everywhere. I ended up getting pregnant, but had a miscarriage because they punched me in the belly.

I was raped, sexually abused, physically and emotionally abused so bad that in 5th grade, I started cutting myself to relieve the pain. I was terrified and scared. Now I have a child of my own. I live in Canada, and am married to a wonderful man. I am doing great. I will never forget what they did to me, and I will never get over it. I will never forgive them.

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