Child Abuse Story From Maddison

Child Abuse Story From Maddison

by Maddy
(USA)

A couple of months ago I went over to my best friend's house to watch our favorite movie. Her dad decided to watch it with us. I didn't object because he was recently divorced and wanted to spend as much time with his daughter as possible, and I trusted him. Halfway through the movie he put his hand on my thigh, which made me nervous because I didn't like people touching me, but I let it go. But after a couple of minutes he put his hand on my genital area and started stroking it. I was really scared so I went to the bathroom.

When I came back out he did it again! My friend noticed I wasn't talking a lot and kept looking over at me. Every time she looked at me he took his hand off me so she never saw anything. After about ten minutes of stroking, he started to grope my breasts. I raised my hand a little because I was surprised, and he stopped. By then my friend got tired of the movie. She took me to play on her computer. Her dad came in and told her to brush her hair because her mom was coming to get her soon, so she left. While she was gone he told me not to tell anyone or else he'd go to hell and that he was sorry, then he hugged me and told me I was very important to him (I guess because I stuck by his daughter through the divorce that was very hard on her). Then he asked if I was alright and I just said yes because I was really shaken up. I left right after that and went home.

I never told anyone anything except my best friend who wanted to call CPS. I convinced her not to because I was afraid that he would find out, and I didn't want him to loose his job or his daughter (whom he never hurt). And it was really embarrassing for me. I did tell my mom that the dad gave me a bad feeling and she told me not to go over there anymore. I'm really scared though because I see all my neighbors often and we have a lot of parties and pot-lucks and I know I'll see him soon because we have one coming up. Now whenever a grown up touches me I get scared. I don't like being around grown men a lot because I'm afraid they'll hurt me.

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Child Abuse Story From Maddison

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Jun 24, 2008

TELL someone...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I agree with your mother that you should stay away from this man's home. But I don't agree with your stance on the rest.

Maddison, the reason your friend's father told you that you were important to him is because he knew what to say to keep you guilt-ridden so that you would NEVER tell. It had nothing to do with how you were such a good friend to his daughter; and you were a good friend to her. Sex offenders like this man know the vulnerabilities of their young victims; he definitely knew yours.

You're assuming your friend's father never hurt her, Maddison; you don't know that for sure. In all likelihood, his IS hurting her. It is quite likely that he is molesting her. He WILL continue to molest other girls whenever given the opportunity. That is the nature of sex offenders: they don't stop until they are MADE to stop.

I understand where you're coming from when you say you are worried that he'll lose his job and/or his daughter. But when you don't act because of such "reasoning" you are making excuses for what he did, for what he will continue to do. I don't believe that you want to live with the guilt after learning that he sexually assaulted another girl, the guilt of knowing that if you had reported what he did to you, your actions could have prevented it from occurring in the first place. I cannot guarantee what will happen when you do disclosed what he did to you, but if you don't Maddison, the repercussions could haunt you for the rest of your life.

Don't bury this. Don't keep it to yourself any longer. Talk to your mother. She can help make a report. She can ensure you get some counselling in order to deal with your understandable fear of men. If you really and truly feel that you can't talk to your mother, then consider speaking with a counsellor at school, or perhaps a trusted teacher. Contact Child Help at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453). They are staffed 24/7 with professionally trained counsellors who will listen to you. They are not a reporting agency, but they can help you through the process of reporting. You've taken the first step by writing to my visitors and me through this website, Maddison. Please take the second step: report what this molester did to you and get the help you need for yourself. You're worth it, dear. You really are.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

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Jun 24, 2008
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Submitted by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

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Comment
I agree with your mother that you should stay away from this man's home. But I don't agree with your stance on the rest. Maddison, the reason your friend's father told you that you were important to him is because he knew what to say to keep you guilt-ridden so that you would NEVER tell. It had nothing to do with how you were such a good friend to his daughter; and you were a good friend to her. Sex offenders like this man know the vulnerabilities of their young victims; he definitely knew yours. You're assuming your friend's father never hurt her, Maddison; you don't know that for sure. In all likelihood, his IS hurting her. It is quite likely that he is molesting her. He WILL continue to molest other girls whenever given the opportunity. That is the nature of sex offenders: they don't stop until they are MADE to stop. I understand where you're coming from when you say you are worried that he'll lose his job and/or his daughter. But when you don't act because of such "reasoning" you are making excuses for what he did, for what he will continue to do. I don't believe that you want to live with the guilt after learning that he sexually assaulted another girl, the guilt of knowing that if you had reported what he did to you, your actions could have prevented it from occurring in the first place. I cannot guarantee what will happen when you do disclosed what he did to you, but if you don't Maddison, the repercussions could haunt you for the rest of your life. Don't bury this. Don't keep it to yourself any longer. Talk to your mother. She can help make a report. She can ensure you get some counselling in order to deal with your understandable fear of men. If you really and truly feel that you can't talk to your mother, then consider speaking with a counsellor at school, or perhaps a trusted teacher. Contact <a href="http://www.childhelp.org/get_help" target="_"blank ref="NOFOLLOW">Child Help</a> at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453). They are staffed 24/7 with professionally trained counsellors who will listen to you. They are not a reporting agency, but they can help you through the process of reporting. You've taken the first step by writing to my visitors and me through this website, Maddison. Please take the second step: report what this molester did to you and get the help you need for yourself. You're worth it, dear. You really are. Darlene Barriere Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator Author: <a href="http://www.child-abuse-effects.com/my-story-of-abuse.html"><i>On My Own Terms, A Memoir</i></a>

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Nov 07, 2008

Your friends dad.
by: Undisclosed8

You are very brave for telling your story on here but you need to tell someone who can do something to help your friend. What will happen when she invites another friend over? He will do it again! He knows what to say to make children keep quiet, this is almost certainly not the first time he has done this.

I think that your friend was actually trying to protect you, it seems to me that she knew what was happening to you when you were watching the movie. You said she kept looking over, chances are she is usually the one being touched or worse when they watch a movie. I think the fact that she quickly decided that she did not want to watch the movie anymore, and moved you into the computer room shows how much of a good friend you have. Even if she didn't know exactly what was going on she knew you were uncomfortable.

You will never know if he does it to her whenever she is over because chances are she is more scared and ashamed than you and will have a lot of trouble telling.

Please tell, after time it will lift a weight off your shoulders. This painful memory will never go away, but if you tell then in the future you will feel more empowered knowing that you did all you could do for other children in the future.

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Child Abuse Story From Maddison

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Child Abuse Story From Maddison