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Child Abuse Story From Krysal

by Krysal J
(Cheyenne, Wyoming, USA)

My Story: 
It all started a few months after my 2nd birthday when my mom met my soon to be step-dad, Michael. He was best friends with my mom's cousin so they sort of knew a little about each other.

They got married a few months after my third birthday. My mom, brother, and I moved out of our grandpa's house in Carlsbad, California to his house in L.A. That's when he started abusing my older brother Alex and me. He would lock us in our closets or in this really dark and scary hallway with no windows.

When I was about 4 years old and my brother was about 6 or 7 years old, my mom and my step-dad had a child together called Chelsea. She was his whole world. If my brother or I got somewhat as an inch close to her, he would yell at us and pull us into the bathroom or his room and beat us so badly with a belt or a paddle that we couldn't sit or stand for a week.

When I was 7 and after they had two more kids, Thomas and Trinity, he lost his job and got sued by his brother, which is when we started seeing his evil side. He was controlling, psychopathic, abusive, and an isolator. He made us move to the high Desert 3 hours away from all our family.

We ran away from him but he kidnapped Thomas and wouldn't give him back so we had to go back to him. When we did, he made us move into this house not so far out of the town we were living in before. That's when everything turned for the worst. It all started when we were about to go to church and Chelsea and Thomas asked him if they could borrow his hair brush. When we were about to leave he asked where his hair brush was. They said they lost it and he made us look for it. When we couldn't find it, he decided someone had to take the blame and it couldn't be Chelsea or Thomas, his "perfect" children. So he told everyone to get out and he locked the door. He had this pole he called his rod. He made me lean against the couch and he told me if I moved or made any noise he'd double it. I ended up getting hit 50 times.

After that, these beatings turned weekly. He even had to pull me out of school because he didn't want anyone to know. One day I had to go get a checkup at the doctor's, and my mom went to go to the bathroom and my doctor started to check my heart beat. Then he started to get lower and then I felt something really cold down there, you know my private area.

About a month later, everyone was outside and I was inside watching Zaboomfoo when he came in with his rod in his hand with an evil look on his face. I tried running for the door but I was too late. He had already locked it. He came toward me, grabbed me by the hair while yelling that I'm worthless, fat, ugly, and lazy. He threw me against the couch. He started hitting me left and right on my back, butt, and thighs.

He decided that we were around too many people and he bought a extremely small motor home. He made us move halfway across the U.S. to Maine, but we had to go back because he needed to retrieve a check when we broke down in Cheyenne, Wyoming where we ended up homeless. After three years being homeless, we finally got a house where we were isolated from society. It's the size of most people's living room. That's where we had the courage to run away from him. Now we're in the process of finalizing the divorce.

A Video Reading by Darlene BarriereNote from Darlene: The volume of contributor submissions has now made it impossible for me to comment personally (especially in great detail) on each and every contribution. If I haven't left you a comment or one that is in-depth, please do not take my lack of a personal response as a slight, or as a statement that your story is somehow unworthy of my time. Nothing, and I do mean nothing, could be further from the truth. If there was a way for me to respond to all of you at length, I would.

Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited, and could result in being banned from making further comments on this site.

Comments for
Child Abuse Story From Krysal

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Jun 15, 2009
Part 1: Michael is to blame, not you, not any of his children...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Krysal, I'm very happy to learn that your mother is divorcing Michael and trying to keep you and your siblings safe from him. You didn't deserve to be beaten or called names. You are NOT the lies he called you. You are smart, and articulate and beautiful in your own right. You are worthy of love and nurturing, and of dignity and respect.

What Michael did to you is not your fault. Whatever twisted thoughts were going through his head, they were about him, not you or anything you did. Michael wasn't thinking right. If he had been, he would have treated you and your brother with love and kindness, even in discipline, just as he treated his biological children. Try not to blame his children for the way HE mistreated you. Blame lies squarely on his shoulders; not theirs. What he did to you had nothing to do with them; it was all to do with their father. What's most important to understand is that it had nothing to do with YOU or YOUR BROTHER.

See Part 2: The doctor's exam... below.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Jun 15, 2009
Part 2: The doctor's exam...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

You mentioned being in the doctor's office, and that when he examined you, you felt something cold in your "private area". Kystal, I'm not sure if you were trying to say that this doctor molested you. What I will tell you is that when a doctor does an internal examination on a girl or a woman, s/he must use an instrument made of polished metal called a speculum. The speculum is used for the doctor to examine inside your "private area". Unless the doctor uses a means to warm it up before using it, it will be cold, and therefore it will feel cold "down there". This exam is normal, Kystal, and necessary to ensure a woman's good health. It is not sexual abuse when done by a qualified physician for this purpose. I will also say that it has become the practice of many male doctors to have a female present in the room during such examinations. This is done to both to ensure the patient feels more comfortable about what the doctor is doing, as well as to ensure that he is not accused of any misconduct. Of course, the female in the room does not actually get to watch the exam in progress; rather, she stands or sits next to the woman or girl being examined, and the patient is covered up from her waist down and not exposed to anyone except the doctor. I hope that clears up any misconceptions you have about what may have happened to you in that doctor's office that day.

I do hope that with the divorce, you and your brother will have in your lives what you've always deserved: love, support and encouragement. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

Jun 15, 2009
Not your fault
by: Francine

Krysal, your so-called step-dad is wrong. You are not ugly; you are not lazy; you are not worthless; you are not fat. You are beautiful, smart, articulate and worthy of love, dignity and respect. I hope that sick excuse for a man is in jail now for all those terrible crimes that he committed against you (and your siblings) because you guys (you and your siblings) did nothing wrong. I am also glad that your mom had to divorce him and I wish you guys all the best.

Jun 16, 2009
loving words. helpful words, empowering words to give you hope
by: maurice

krysal, great you arrived at Darlene's site. She sure knows what is best for you in all you've shared with her and her visitors. her words of love, her words of caring, her true words for you to begin your journey upwards and onwards. Always believe in yourself as Rhianna reminds you you are beautiful and not any of the calling names of your father or mother or indeed anyone. She was very true in all she said you were. Love words from her heart to you. Begin to get a high self esteem of yourself, begin in or at the mirror. saying beautiful and nice thing about yourself. It is not sill it is natural and true. Like that great and wonmderful person in the mirror. Be nice, be gentle especially with the parts of that were abuse. soothe them, massage them just treat them with gentleness. You'll feel good Kyrsal. Say to that unique and special Me in the mirror. I can accomplish anything I want for me in my life. never doubt that Kyrsal. Value and love your friends who will walk with you.talk with you and accept you for who you are now. HUGS all around.

Jul 02, 2009
mix up
by: Krystal

Sorry about the inconvienence i accidently spelt my name wrong it's Krystal J not krysal J.thanks everyone for your comments and encouragement sorry about the spelling also my computer wasn't working right when i wrote my story and thank you Ms.Darlene for what you said and you know the thing you wrote about the docter thing well it wasn't one of those checkups i would know ive had one before and it was nothing like what happened to me when i was little it was just a regular checkup and it happened.

Jul 03, 2009
mixed up, confused, bad writing the least of your worries.
by: maurice

Hiya Kyrstal J, thank you for returning to darlene's site that is all that matters, you needed to get something off your chest and you did. all the other insignificants are not the matter. YOU are [brave] for sharing I find it a great release when I write comments back to great and wonderful people telling their story knowing Darlene is there to welcome them and make them feel a little safer in themselves for relating their abuse. I ask myself from time to time why did I find her site. I believe there was a reason and I benefited from it. Krystal J always believe in yourself. your story is very real to you, get all the love and help to continue letting go of it. Begin by loving yourself, I am beautiful, I am special, I can accomplish anything I want in my life. JUST FOR WONDERFUL ME,

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