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Child Abuse Story From KM

by KM
(South Carolina, USA)




Grandfather molested me with parents in the next room: 
My Dad's father molested me on a vacation to the grandparents home in Florida. I was a freshman in high school from Michigan. I looked forward to the airplane ride and the vacation to Florida. It was an exciting thing to look forward to.

Once there, I saw my Grandparents did not live in a 'cool place'. It was in the panhandle of Florida. Not sunny or fun at all.

My parents were in one room. I got up to go to the bathroom. When I came out to go back to where my parents were, my grandfather was sitting in a chair away from everyone and pulled me on his lap. It was odd. I knew I was too old and too big to be on his lap. He was a weird guy anyway. He held me to his lap and felt me over my body. It was so horrible. I was torn between running and the fear of respect. He completely molested me.

I pretended like nothing happened and avoided him.

I ended up starting my period. I thought his touch did this to me. I would hide my bleeding. I buried my panties in the sand across the road in a ditch.

I did not tell anyone for years. Later, I learned he was accused of this type of conduct. He got away with molesting me under my parents nose. My Dad never addressed it. It was pushed under the rug.

I am 50 years old and this memory haunts me. I don't know how to erase this memory.




Darlene Barriere: author. speaker. survivor. coachNote from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.

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Comments for
Child Abuse Story From KM

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Jan 01, 2012
To KM:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

There is no erasing memories. One can only hope to gain perspective, and in that perspective, live one's life moving forward. Remember this: the molestation is over and done with, except in your mind. You have re-lived the memory of the sexual abuse many more times than it ever happened, and your body doesn't know the difference. But you can choose to see, and thus react to those memories in a different way. You can't change the past, nor can you change how you feel. You can, however, choose to think differently about what happened to you, and thus change how you feel, which in turn will change how you act. Consider the work of Byron Katie or Colin Tipping. Both use similar methods to get you to see things in your Past in a way that may be helpful to you in the Present moment, providing you're prepared to keep an open mind. Their methods can also help you deal with the feelings of betrayal and abandonment you still have with your parents, especially your father. Just don't blame yourself. What happened wasn't your fault, and will never be your fault. You didn't tell because of fear of not being believed and other fears as well. None of that makes any of this your fault. I send you love, light and positive energy. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir


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