Child Abuse Story From Josie
by Josie K.
(West Plains, Missouri, USA)
When I awakened, I had several tubes and monitors attached to me. I was a scared little girl of only eleven. A doctor came in and I asked him where my mommy was. He told me she couldn't be there, that my grandparents would be coming to take me home. My grandparents arrived, and I asked them when I would see my mom. Grandma said not for a very long time, and I cried at the thought of not seeing my mommy. I could not remember what had happened.
My mother had been physically abusing me since I was six, when my younger brother passed away. She said it was my fault and I had to pay. I just thought it was her way of grieving. So I let it go on without telling anyone. Her favorite item was the belt, and it was used daily on me.
On that crisp autumn day, my mom told me that she would end our pain that we felt for my dead brother. She grabbed the sharpest kitchen knife she owned and slit my throat quite deeply. I screamed at her to not. Then she did it to herself. The neighbor heard me scream and came rushing over to find us covered in blood. She called 911. I survived, but my mother was pronounced dead.
I still have the scar from the knife cut. Every time I get my hands on a knife, I reopen the scar until my husband stops me. He knows I hurt, but he doesn't know how badly. I want my life to end every now and then, so I can see my mom. My husband holds me tight whenever I feel this way and assures me I need to live for him and for my future twins, who will be due in two months. I plan to raise them with loving care and let them know Mommy won't do anything to hurt them or herself.
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