Child Abuse Story From Jennifer

Child Abuse Story From Jennifer

by Jennifer B
(Nebraska, USA)

My child abuse started when I was 3 years old, when my mom got out of prison. After she got out, she met this guy and they started dating. Soon, she got pregnant with my little brother. I'm not sure how the abuse started, but all I know is that it did start and went on till I was the age of 10.

We moved to Arkansas with him, and it still kept happening. I remember this one time, my mom was at work. Me and my brother were supposed to be taking a nap. He came in and pulled out his penis and told me to suck it. I told him no, and luckily, his mom was coming down the hall, and so he went out.

I was sexually assaulted I would have to say over 200 hundred times. I tried to tell my mom 3 times, but she always told me, "No he didn't. Stop lying" and stuff like that.

We moved again, and I met some friends. I started drinking because it was the only way to cope with what happened to me. I always drank and ran away from home and stuff that, stuff I could do to hurt my mom and him for what they did to me! But all that changed on May 5th 2006 when I decided to run off so I could go drink.

We were all sitting at the table. I jumped up and ran out the door. He came after me! I was running so fast that he didn't catch me! But I stopped to hide and he found me and he got on top of me like he used to and I don't know what happened but I remembered all those times he was on top of me and I started screaming "Get off me. Get off me. Get off me." My mom finally came down there. I was telling him to "Let me go or else I'm going to tell on you!" I screamed at him. My mom just looked at him as if to say, "What is she talking about?"

I told the cops what happened, and still no one believed me, till I took a lie detector test. I got sent off to Geneva Youth Rehabilitation Center in Nebraska for my problems. My mom told me she was sorry for not believing me. He is now in prison for what he did. He's 57 years old and doing 40 years. So he is going to die in there.

I forgave him for what he did to me...he is my little brother and sister's dad.

After I got out of Rehab, I went back and met the most amazing guy you could ever imagine! We have a daughter together. I'm 16 now, and the nightmare has started all over again. My mom has started dating his son! I'm so scared for my daughter. I pray to God that the same thing doesn't happen to her! I don't know why my mom would do something like that to me again. My mom and him won't let me take my daughter to see her dad or anything. My boyfriend, my baby's daddy, is the best thing that has ever happened to me. The reason my mom wont let me take my daughter to see her dad is because her stupid boyfriend doesn't like him! I wish my life would change! I'm just so scared! But I pray to God every night and ask him to help me and help me to keep my little girl safe from harm.

Darlene's comments to this "Child Abuse Story From Jennifer" are at the link below.

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Child Abuse Story From Jennifer

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Apr 02, 2008

You have reason to be concerned...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Jennifer, your mother's judgment certainly appears to be lacking. She should have believed you when you were telling her about the sexual abuse her boyfriend was inflicting on you, and she should have protected you. She failed you as a little girl, and it seems she is continuing to fail you now.

As a mother yourself, it is your job to protect your daughter from harm, as you well know. I commend you for realizing that and for wanting to ensure that your little girl doesn't have to deal with what you were forced to deal with.

Please consider contacting your local Women's Shelter to speak with a counsellor there about the situation you are living with. They may have access to resources that can help you. Child Help at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) is another resource for you to consider. They are staffed 24/7 with professionally trained counsellors who will listen to you. They can help you both as an adolescent dealing with the effects of child abuse, and as a young mother trying to protect her little girl.

Jennifer, I've said this before, I'll say it again here to you: The best gift you can give your daughter is to take good care of her mother. I sincerely wish you and your daughter all the best.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

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Apr 02, 2008
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Submitted by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

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Jennifer, your mother's judgment certainly appears to be lacking. She should have believed you when you were telling her about the sexual abuse her boyfriend was inflicting on you, and she should have protected you. She failed you as a little girl, and it seems she is continuing to fail you now. As a mother yourself, it is your job to protect your daughter from harm, as you well know. I commend you for realizing that and for wanting to ensure that your little girl doesn't have to deal with what you were forced to deal with. Please consider contacting your local Women's Shelter to speak with a counsellor there about the situation you are living with. They may have access to resources that can help you. <a href="http://www.childhelp.org/get_help" target="_blank" ref="no follow">Child Help</a> at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) is another resource for you to consider. They are staffed 24/7 with professionally trained counsellors who will listen to you. They can help you both as an adolescent dealing with the effects of child abuse, and as a young mother trying to protect her little girl. Jennifer, I've said this before, I'll say it again here to you: The best gift you can give your daughter is to take good care of her mother. I sincerely wish you and your daughter all the best. Darlene Barriere Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator Author: <a href="http://www.child-abuse-effects.com/my-story-of-abuse.html">On My Own Terms, A Memoir</a>

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Apr 02, 2008

Don't let him WIN!
by: Linda

I am very sorry that sexual abuse happened you. That sorry, lowdown scum took away your childhood. He doesn't deserve your forgiveness. I think forty years was to easy for him. The judge should have given him life without parole. You still have your whole life ahead of you. Separate yourself from these horrible people for your Baby's sake and yours. Seek counceling for yourself and try to move ahead with your life. Forget about forgiving that animal, Forgiving him is like making what he did to you was alright. Your mother needs to be in jail with him.

Apr 03, 2008

About forgiveness...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I'm writing this just as much for Linda who commented below as for Jennifer.

Forgiveness is not about saying what somewhat did to you was okay; what happened will NEVER be okay. And it is not about telling that person you forgive them either. Forgiveness does not mean that your abuser wins; quite the opposite. Forgiveness is saying to yourself that you will no longer allow what that person did to you control any aspect of your life. Forgiveness is letting go of the anger and the hostility, and yes, sometimes fear. Only through forgiveness can you move forward with your life, because without forgiveness, the anger and fear and emotional turmoil continue to consume you and everything you do. Without forgiveness there is no peace.

I certainly understand why you feel so strongly, Linda; but I must ask you to consider the effect of discouraging forgiveness. When you either lambaste someone for forgiving, or when you so vehemently advocate against it, your words advocate more hatred, more anger and endless emotional upheaval. I know in my heart that you don't really want that for anyone.

I wrote an article as an answer to a visitor's question on the issue of forgiveness in my June 2007 issue of Barriere Bits E-zine. It's worth a gander. You'll need to subscribe (it's free) through my subscription page. Once you sign up, you'll have access to my back issues through a link in the e-mail you will receive as a subscription confirmation—but first, make sure you actually confirm your subscription; Canadian law makes this step necessary (you'll have that ability through a different e-mail once you sign up). If you are already a subscriber, you'll find the link toward the bottom of any issue of Barriere Bits in your e-mail Inbox.

When you are on the Back Issues page, just click onto the link titled June 17, 2007 -- Barriere Bits, Issue #001 -- Grandparents vs parental rights.

Linda, before I close, I must say that you otherwise do an excellent job of posting supportive and encouraging comments to the other contributors on this site. I hope you will continue to do so. Your absence would be noticed and sorely missed.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

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Apr 03, 2008
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Submitted by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

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Comment
I'm writing this just as much for Linda who commented below as for Jennifer. Forgiveness is not about saying what somewhat did to you was okay; what happened will NEVER be okay. And it is not about telling that person you forgive them either. Forgiveness does not mean that your abuser wins; quite the opposite. Forgiveness is saying to yourself that you will no longer allow what that person did to you control any aspect of your life. Forgiveness is letting go of the anger and the hostility, and yes, sometimes fear. Only through forgiveness can you move forward with your life, because without forgiveness, the anger and fear and emotional turmoil continue to consume you and everything you do. Without forgiveness there is no peace. I certainly understand why you feel so strongly, Linda; but I must ask you to consider the effect of discouraging forgiveness. When you either lambaste someone for forgiving, or when you so vehemently advocate against it, your words advocate more hatred, more anger and endless emotional upheaval. I know in my heart that you don't really want that for anyone. I wrote an article as an answer to a visitor's question on the issue of forgiveness in my June 2007 issue of Barriere Bits E-zine. It's worth a gander. You'll need to subscribe (it's free) through my <a href="http://www.child-abuse-effects.com/BarriereBits.html" target="_blank">subscription page</a>. Once you sign up, you'll have access to my back issues through a link in the e-mail you will receive as a subscription confirmation—but first, make sure you actually confirm your subscription; Canadian law makes this step necessary (you'll have that ability through a different e-mail once you sign up). If you are already a subscriber, you'll find the link toward the bottom of any issue of Barriere Bits in your e-mail Inbox. When you are on the Back Issues page, just click onto the link titled June 17, 2007 -- Barriere Bits, Issue #001 -- Grandparents vs parental rights. Linda, before I close, I must say that you otherwise do an excellent job of posting supportive and encouraging comments to the other contributors on this site. I hope you will continue to do so. Your absence would be noticed and sorely missed. Darlene Barriere Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator Author: <a href="http://www.child-abuse-effects.com/my-story-of-abuse.html">On My Own Terms, A Memoir</a>

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Apr 05, 2008

Forgiveness
by: Emily

I believe that no one can tell you to forgive; the last article about how you must forgive to have peace.....not necessarily.

I believe you must heal within yourself and realize that you didn't deserve to be hurt. I have turned to God to help me, "Look to Jesus not the Storm". So focusing on the abuser isn't healthy...because then you re-live the abuse over and over again.

If someone truly repents and is sorry, forgiveness is required....if they are not sorry and do not repent.....I say, forgivness isn't the right term.....it is more of a letting go...it wasn't your fault.

Focusing on living a good life now and setting boundaries and not allowing others to hurt you....and focusing on what is good....not allowing the abuse to keep you in the darkness of resentment and despair. Maybe letting go is another term for forgiveness.....but I don't think forgiveness means continuuing to see the abuser.....and it doesn't mean minimzing what he or she did.

Apr 06, 2008

i will pray
by: kayla

I will pray every night that this will not happen agian to you or her

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Child Abuse Story From Jennifer

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Child Abuse Story From Jennifer