Child Abuse Story From Grace

by Grace
(Phoenix, Arizona, USA)

So Ashamed:  
When I was 8, my parents were very lax about supervising me. I would go to my cousin's house. My cousin was 3 years older than me. He and I would walk down the road to his grandfather's house, and then we would take his boat to a small island. For a long time, we just played cards there. But one day, he brought a blanket. He told me to lie down on it, and told me he was going to make me feel really good. I said no, but he insisted, and I gave in. He reached over and pulled my panties down and took off his underwear. He made me play with and suck on his penis, and he kissed and licked my privates for hours. Sometimes, after I had played with him for a long time, he would try to make me eat what I now know was cum, but I never did. Sometimes, when he was down on me, he would put suntan lotion on my anus and then put his finger into me. I think that I might have had an orgasm a few times, but I'm not sure.

This went on until I reached Junior High, and got the nerve to say no. Even though I know it was wrong...it felt so good. The guilt I now feel over wanting those feelings again is so enormous, that I find myself overeating a lot when I think of it. I'm heavy and wish I could stop the compulsive eating.

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