Child Abuse Story From Chava

by Chava
(Location Undisclosed)

i know i am not perfect
but fate you are unfair
she is my only mother
so why'd she pull my hair?
so why'd she always slap me?
a bar of soap right down my throat
and i was only seven
back then i still had hope
i tried my best for perfection
but one slip was still the end
its funny how when you pull someones hair
how far back their back will bend
my arms were always throbbing
her grasp a faint red mark
my eyes were always sobbing
to hear her snide remarks
and when she'd slap, or throw me down
or with a belt she'd chase me round
or when she'd drag, pull my pants down
and slap my butt a snapping sound
or when she'd call me bitch or brat
or bad little thing, and things like that
and when she'd embarrass, mock, and imitate
then call me abuser, voice full of hate
and after this she'd always say
i love you now and everyday
then why dear mom would you ever say
such things to me if you really felt that way
i remember when i was barely four
hiding by the bathroom door
and looking in the mirror to see
the marks the spanks this day had given me
i ask you now what i ever did?
maybe now but not when i was a kid
i did not deserve your slaps or spanks
or grabs or jabs and pulls or yanks
or bars of soap right down my throat
or therapists so i could cope
i did not deserve your threats or stares
or ignoring me, so i would care
or nails in skin, that is not fair
or face in face, with spit on mine
so i was sometimes bad sometimes id whine
but why oh mom
why would you always explode?
and ignore my pleas for love
and so dear mom i wrote this ode
to express all that above.

i am not sure what i experienced, i was not beaten. i was chased, and grabbed, and slapped, and sometimes dragged, my hair was pulled, my mouth washed out, i was spanked, and sometimes hit, my mother would stand over me her face right up in mine, shed call me names, and mock me and dig her nails into my skin.

my story is not as bad as others on this site, it may not even have been abuse.
my mother would turn on me for no reason, with out notice, for nothing all of a sudden i would be the worst child in the world and the next second she loved me with all her heart.
scenario: i was pouring some orange juice and i accidentally spilled some, my mom would freak out, shove me out of the way and scream at me about how careless i am and how i never pay attention and how i am such a bad girl, mind you i was only around 8, and of course i would scream back and thats when she would begin to chase me and slap me, she sometimes chased me around with belt, and when she caught me she would wrestle me down, take down my pants and hit me. and when i say scream i mean scream at the top of her lungs. then after this she would leave me alone and shut her door and leave me out side it, and then she would come out and act as if nothing happened, or make me apologize for about a hundred things that i never did, for being "rude" "careless" "talking back" "bad girl" etc. or she would completely forget about it until later when i did something wrong and she would literally explode at me, i don't know if this is abuse or if i am just over reacting, i know this isn't as bad as you hear about and i was just wondering if this is how normal families are. this type of situation happened around once a day...to four times a week from about 3-4 years old to 13. i am 15 now and she still explodes but thanks g-d she hasn't tried to hit me after she got cancer. thank you.

---

Note from Darlene: If I have not left a comment on your story, please understand that it is not personal; it's just that my hectic schedule no longer permits me to do so.

I hope you'll follow me on:


Email addresses, phone numbers, home addresses AND website/blog URLs in submissions and visitor comments are STRICTLY prohibited. Please don't include them, as they will be removed.